876 Days And Counting

I still remember thinking I was experiencing a midlife crisis. After all I was always told “growing old ain’t for sissies.” But, now I understand that I’m just daily battling with this awful thing called chronic pain. I can’t believe I’ve dealt with this at ages 40, 41, 42, and soon to be 43. While my wisdom has greatly increased my health has drastically decreased.

Here I am again at midnight just trying to ease the pain. My legs are literally vibrating with nerve pain. My lower back has been aching for hours. And my chest has been flooded with anxiety associated with it all. For hours I’ve had enough meds in me that would put any average soul fast asleep. But, now I’m having to take a Valium and pray my nerves settle down soon.

It’s now been approximately 876 days since my major slip and fall occurred. I won’t call it an accident because God only make appointments. But, life has never been the same since that day. The pain has been constant. The days and nights have been long. The lessons learned have been many.

I wouldn’t wish this ongoing pain on anyone. Yes, I always recognize things could be worse. I thank God daily for His constant mercy, grace, and strength. But, this battle has been constant and only God knows whether I will deal with this the rest of this short life. I know for sure that one day it will all come to an end.

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.”
Revelation 21:4