My Limitations Frighten Me
I’ve had a rather short day considering most people’s normal Friday. I didn’t even get out of bed until nearly 1pm. Therefore, I’ve only been awake for a little over 8 hours and it’s already time for my nighttime meds. Besides getting a bite to eat I’ve not left the house all day. Yet, my body already feels shot. All I’ve done is spend a few hours on the phone counseling others through life’s difficulties.
The old me would barely be getting started and nowhere near tired. Yet, my present neurological issues have melted my internal circuits in the blink of an eye. I was getting choked up earlier telling my wife one of my greatest fears. I said, “I feel such a big call on my life to build a church that will literally reach thousands. However, I can barely handle twenty five percent of what I used to be able to handle. How am I supposed to do things now?”
I could easily assume that God’s plans for my life have been drastically altered. But, I’m choosing to believe that my present condition is a major part of God’s future plans. One, I believe this way God will receive all the glory for anything accomplished. Two, I can’t help but draw desperately close to God for guidance and strength. Three, God is protecting me from trying to be everyone’s savior. Instead, I will have to share the load of God’s big vision with many others if it’s to be accomplished. So, while my limitations may be many. God’s power will be clearly seen in me and despite me. If God’s plans are dependent upon life’s unexpected we’re all doomed.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” (Jeremiah 29:11)