Many women have stepped up and taken over leadership in their homes because the man they married has shown no sign of leadership. Men, we have been called by God to lead our homes in the way God would have us to lead them. Being a leader is not an option if you hope to lead those you love towards better days. This is done best when you submit to God’s leadership and authority. Then, seek to lead your family by example, by faith, and with an unconditional love.


I’ve been guilty many times throughout my 15 years of marriage of attempting to fix my wife. I heard what my wife was saying, but I wasn’t listening to her heart. I have learned over time that it is very important to listen to what my wife is saying both verbally and non-verbally. The only way I can truly say that I’m living with my wife in an understanding way is for me to really get to know her. Your wife doesn’t expect you to fix all her problems, but she does need to know you care enough to listen.


Way beyond your physical relationship your wife needs to feel that she is loved. That love needs to be communicated and displayed on a daily basis. Your genuine love will move your wife more than any flowers, box of candy or empty words. You need to learn your spouse’s love language and always look for ways to highlight her specialness. It’s been said that the key to any successful marriage is “Learning how to fall in love with the same person over and over again.” Never stop dating, being creative, or communicating your love to one another.


Yes, you need to lead your spouse and your family. But, your wife needs to know that you are her partner in this life. That no matter what comes her way you will be there. That no matter what she does you will be by her side. Don’t treat her like she is your child, your slave, or just the mother of your children. Your wife needs to know that she can share her deepest and darkest secrets with you. Home should be a safe place and you should be her best friend. This means you have to make time for each other, communicate on a daily basis, and remember the lifetime vows you made to her.


You don’t have to agree on everything, but you should always do your best to protect your wife and kids. I know many women who could beat me in arm wrestling, but they are still looking for their man to be their defender, their protector, and their hero. Don’t stand by quietly when your wife is being ripped apart by her family, friends, or total strangers. Don’t sit on the bench when your wife needs you to be her head coach. I know many women who are heartbroken because they feel they can’t depend on their husband to step up and defend them when necessary. Fight for your marriage, fight for your children, and fight for their future.

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