Real & Raw Take 4000

I’m not gonna lie. Every time I hurt this bad I’m shocked. I’m always hoping the nightmare is over. It hurts so freaking bad in that same old spot. How can it still be this bad? What will this mean for the rest of my life?

Who am I’m kidding? I’m still trying to figure out how I’ll deal with this for the rest of this week. Since 9am Sunday morning I knew things weren’t trending in a positive direction. By that afternoon I was just pure nauseous from the pain. No bath or meds have done much to faze it.

It sucks so much joy out of my life. Makes me not look forward to anything. There is nothing you can fully enjoy when you’re consumed with this level of pain. And, I have no idea what my spinal cord stimulator is or is not doing.

Lord Jesus you know I need you. Once again, I pray you ease my aching body. Once again, please give me the strength, peace, comfort and faith I need to see beyond this season. Help me hold on to hope when I feel hopeless. Remind me often how faithful You have been all my life!

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