Lord Grant Me Favor
Today was a very intense day for me. I had a very important meeting with one of my doctors and some others. Discussed was my past, present, and potential future medical care. I felt like I was hearing about a very sad journey that has still not found a very happy ending. Anytime you hear a doctor say “we’ve done all we can do” it’s usually not a positive thing.
If there was anything positive it was the fact that I’ve not become addicted to any narcotics after 32 months of this suffering. I’ve made a 100 if you will on every random drug test. I’ve always done what I could to better my health. I’ve always followed every doctor’s order given to me. And, I’m still far from giving up hope.
The negative thing is none of it has changed my situation. Every attempt to address the nerve damage has only further revealed the permanence and level of that damage. I’ve now heard from every doctor that has taken care of me for any length of time the same words. “Mr. Crosby, this will never get better.” Every time you hear those words it throws tons of water on your fire towards recovery. However, I prayed all day today what I will continue to pray. Lord, grant me favor as I seek to do Your will every step of the way. Despite the outcome, the odds, and the overwhelming conclusions. I place my full trust in You not man or my situation.
“Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of this your servant and to the prayer of your servants who delight in revering your name. Give your servant success today by granting him favor in the presence of this man.”