I Would Rather Just Pray
Oh how much easier it is to pray for someone else struggling than to go through certain things yourself. Actually it’s easier to have faith for others than to trust God with yourself. I would much rather stay by the bedside of someone. Than to be in the bedside hurting one day myself. Not that I wish anything on anyone. Suffering is just not something any of us welcome.
All day the wind has been knocked out of my sails. Somehow God allows me to put my mind over matter why I preach. Today I truly had no choice but to stay seated. With every word prayers were uttered. The entire time I’m thinking any minute I’m going to collapse. I can’t tell you how many Sundays God has spared me from being publicly humiliated.
Yet, this was a cross I needed to bear. It’s teaching me what you can’t learn in books or just by watching others struggle. Most people think they’ve experienced brokenness until they truly encounter a season of suffering themselves. I still feel God at work every second. I still hate how I feel about every other minute. So, just as I would tell anyone else I must remind myself. It’s not about my will, but His will that truly matters.
“Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” Like 22:42