Desperate To Meet You
There used to be a time when I could easily just step away to meet with God. I would just head out my house and find some quiet place to hear God’s voice. There was no distance I wasn’t willing to drive. No sacrifice I was not willing to make early or late to just give God my undivided attention. Now, I’m fighting to come up with a new approach to remove distractions. However, it’s not because I’m not willing to do whatever it takes.
Sadly, my nerve wrecked body won’t allow me to just get in the car and drive any distance. I could do so, but I would be consumed with double my pain once I reached my destination. There’s hardly any place I can sit inside or outside my house with great comfort. Not long ago, we bought new furniture with my back issues in mind. Even still, I fight constantly to find a seating position that allows me to not just feel constant discomfort. Even my spinal cord stimulator that helps with my nerve condition fails me often. Even as I write this I’ve had to shut it off due to over stimulation.
Fortunately, God knows my heart, thoughts and every desire. I know satan will do everything he can to distract and discourage me. I’m not going to stop running towards God. I will keep seeking to remove every hindrance. From taking walks, rising early, using special chairs, staying in the tub, laying on heating pads, to seizing every moment of clarity I can find. I even limit my time on social media, interaction with others, and put my phone on silence several times throughout the day. Bottom line is I’ve got to do whatever it takes because nothing matters more than hearing God’s voice and seeking God’s will. I’m desperate for His presence, His peace, and His direction.
“As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?” Psalm 42:1-2)