First Major Meltdown In 21 Days

To a certain degree I could see it coming from a mile away. In another respect, it just ran over me without warning. All I know was one moment I seemed okay and the next moment I clearly was not. I just finished having what I’ve not had in over 21 days. I just had a stressed induced neurological breakdown.

When this happens my entire body feels like it’s being electrocuted. My mind and body feel completely out of control. Now, that I’ve calmed down a little I can only try to catch my breath. Once again, I just reached my limit. A limit I’ve learned many times before must become a respected reality. Bottom line, I’m just not who I used to be and that I have to fully accept it. I’ve tried to do too many things for too many days straight in a row. And, I’m very disappointed in myself if I’m honest.

I’ve dealt with a lot of emotional things all week. From sun up to sun down I’ve been dealing with intense ministry moments. For nine days straight I’ve been eating with extreme discipline. And, feeling great from it I might add. However, while I have been taking great care of my body. I failed once again to fully respect my condition. The fact that I just have to straight up tell people that here is what I can and cannot do. I truly believe that overall health is made up of several components. Physical, mental, emotional, social, and spiritual health all matter.

Honestly, while I’ve been doing great with what’s necessary for me physically. I’ve not consistently done what’s best for me mentally, emotionally, socially, or spiritual. I’m praying this reminder helps someone else besides just me. Seek to be healthy in all areas of your life. Because anything you let go for too long is bound to catch up with you sooner than later. Especially when you live with a condition that leaves little room for error.

Overall, I thank God for all the great days of breakthrough I’ve enjoyed. And, all the great days that still lie ahead. I would love to perfect this thing called recovery. But, there is no perfecting it. It’s just doing your best and trusting God with the rest. It’s daily seeking to learn, adjust, and seek to live life to the fullest. Well, I just had my 9 year old little faith walker pray with me and I feel much better. Now, I’ve got to do better.

Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may have life, and have it in all its fullness.” (John 10:10)

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