Pain & Hunger Don’t Mix

Because of much tougher seasons I’m pretty used to pain. I truly can’t remember waking up and not aching in some significant way. However, I feel like food can make one just as crazy. I guess you could say it was the one thing I could still control. Before, I could wake up and eat whatever I wanted. Then, all that seemed to change overnight.

It’s been 30 days, but now reality has finally hit me. If I’m going to do this I have to eat differently than most around me. I can’t just grab some ice cream, pie, cake, or banana pudding. Notice, I’m just listing a few things I would give anything for at this time. However, I know if I started feeding my real appetite things would get out of hand very quickly.

Earlier I was waiting on some salmon, asparagus, and sweet potatoes my wife was baking. All I did was walk in the kitchen to see things every direction my body shouldn’t digest. After discovering some sugar free cool whip in the fridge I began to indulge in what felt like a drug. After several big dips with some strawberries I got another big wake up call. I’m thinking to myself “this is my new reality.”

This not easy and the battle is not over. I literally yelled for my wife to come take the cool whip bowl from me before I cleared it all out. Yep, for me there really is no in between. Either I will eat disciplined or I want. Either this fight is worth the discipline or it’s not. Fortunately, my mind knows the right answer and my stomach is now full of salmon, asparagus, and sweet potatoes. But, it has left me irritable and moody to say the least.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7

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