Humbled But At Peace
I was so thrilled with the pain relief I experienced yesterday. Everything seemed to be trending forward. While I wasn’t pain free, I felt like I had once again bounced back to normal. I even had a great nights sleep. Then, I got up very optimistic only to feel my body crumbling inside.
Once again it feels impossible to bend or twist my lower back any direction. Anytime I try to get up or walk around the pain feels breathtaking. I’ve had to wear my back brace anytime I’m up for any reason. I’ve had no choice but to stay down, keep resting and keep praying.
The degree of pain in my lower back is something I’ve not experienced since 2018 or 2019. Last Monday it knocked me down for 2 days. This past Friday it knocked me down for two days. Today, it confirmed that something has to change because that particular pain doesn’t seem to be going away.
Today I was able to make an appointment with my pain specialist for this Wednesday. I’ve got to be seen before they can request and schedule me another pain injection. All I can assume is it’s just been way too long since my last pain shot.
In the meantime, I’ve got to doctor myself and rely on my divine physician. I’m having to say no to anything that is not absolutely necessary. I’m having to listen to my body with every step. Because I’ve been here many times before I’m not very anxious. However, I do have many big God assignments coming up that will require my health to improve very soon.
Please pray my pain and physical limitations will not get any worse. Any worse and I won’t be able to do much of anything. Right now, I can at least lay down or in a hot tub comfortably. It’s already hard to get up and even sit up straight. It’s like a huge brick of pain is stuck behind the titanium and screws in my lower back.
This is not my normal nerve pain. This is the kind of pain that feels like something is broke inside. However, I fully believe it’s just an indication of inflammation that is trapped and no longer under control. Pray that I don’t have to wait long to get this pain shot. I’m certain God will renew my strength in due time. This is all allowed for God’s purpose and plan. I’m simply surrendering myself to Him and trusting Him forward. Pray for my wife too because this always puts even more on her shoulders as she helps me so much.
“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:6-7)