FAITH WALKING Category
Real Pain = Real Distress
Posted on November 19, 2025 Leave a Comment
I’ll never forget a lady who told me several years ago that my pain was “only in my head.” Honestly, it was all I could do not to knock her in the head. When pain is real and intense, you’re simply not in an easy place. And the longer it lingers, the more it affects […]
Understanding a Pastor’s Heart
Posted on November 14, 2025 Leave a Comment
This has been one of those weeks where I’ve dealt with a little bit of everything imaginable. As a pastor, I’m used to carrying heavy things on my plate and on my heart. It usually takes a lot to exceed my normal weeks of ministry, but this week has been extra full of crisis, tears, […]
Tribute to Big Dog
Posted on November 13, 2025 Leave a Comment
I grew up as a pastor’s son my entire life. My dad and mom showed me what it truly means to lay your life down for Christ daily. However, growing up, I never once thought about becoming a pastor myself. In the summer of 1993, I felt God calling me into the ministry. All I […]
It Always Follows Me
Posted on November 5, 2025 Leave a Comment
Overall, I’ve had a blessed week. Great quality time with my wife and a much needed break from the normal grind of ministry and work life. Aimee and I are both so used to staying fully engaged in helping others every day. It’s always good, and necessary, to step away and breathe for a bit. […]
Very Grateful to God
Posted on November 3, 2025 Leave a Comment
As we leave today for our trip, I feel just like I would on any other Monday—grateful and hopeful. I’m thankful to say that I’m almost completely past the temporary pain caused by last Tuesday’s Rhizotomy. Praise God for continued healing and relief! God bless each of you!
I’m Doing Much Better
Posted on November 2, 2025 Leave a Comment
Things aren’t perfect, but they’re improving day by day. I still can’t bend down easily, and my legs remain weak, but I’m so grateful for every ounce of relief and healing. Of course, the colder weather never helps these aging bones. Tonight, I’m going to bed with greater peace. I’ve been leaning heavily on the […]
Painful Waiting Is Never Easy
Posted on November 1, 2025 Leave a Comment
Today has been another emotional and physical roller coaster. This recovery is definitely testing my patience. On one hand, I hardly have any of my usual nerve pain. On the other hand, new pain keeps pulling me down. My legs feel very weak, my left hip aches every time I move, and all of this […]
Better Days Ahead
Posted on October 31, 2025 Leave a Comment
Just over 62 hours ago, I had my first-ever lower back rhizotomy. I went into the procedure optimistic, but honestly unsure how things would feel afterward. The procedure itself was more painful than any of my countless steroid injections. In fact, the numbing shots before the rhizotomy hurt worse than any injection I’ve ever received. […]
Getting My First Rhizotomy
Posted on October 28, 2025 Leave a Comment
We leave at 6:30 a.m. tomorrow morning for my first-ever rhizotomy procedure. This may help me far more than the previous steroid injections. If it works well, it’s something I’ll likely only need once or twice a year. There are virtually no long-term side effects, whereas quarterly steroid injections can definitely affect bone health over […]
God Uses Every Storm
Posted on October 23, 2025 Leave a Comment
Last night, sometime after 3 a.m., I wrote these words before finally passing out from exhaustion: “Here I am again. The pain running throughout me like a wildfire. It comes with no warning. Right now, it’s suffocating and takes my breath away.” Earlier today, every nerve in my body felt like it was on fire […]
Writing with My Left Hand
Posted on September 10, 2025 Leave a Comment
Today has been a long, up-and-down day. My hand is wrapped much more than I expected, and I thought it would be able to breathe a little easier. The brace and bandages are very uncomfortable, even though I know they’re protecting the incisions. The next few days will no doubt be painful and make everything […]
Minor Surgery Tomorrow
Posted on September 9, 2025 Leave a Comment
I can’t remember the last time my right hand could lie flat. My pinky finger has been bound for years due to Dupuytren’s contracture, and it hurts anytime I try to grab something. Over time, it has continued to restrict my hand from opening fully. This condition is hereditary. I noticed my dad had it […]
Fighting with My Body
Posted on September 5, 2025 Leave a Comment
The battle with my body never seems to end. Some days, nights, and weeks are tougher than others. Heat, ice, and Epsom salts have become a regular part of my life—probably half the time, if not more. I try to be proactive, doing what I can to stay ahead of the pain. But there are […]
Dealing with Constant Triggers
Posted on September 4, 2025 Leave a Comment
If you have a chronic health condition you can probably identify with mine. My chronic pain and chronic hives can both be ignited by so many things. We’re talking water, sweat, heat, cool weather, walking, sitting, stress, thinking, not enough sleep, too long laying down, riding or driving, and honestly I can name many more […]
Understanding Chronic Pain
Posted on August 27, 2025 Leave a Comment
10 Things to Know “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.”—2 Corinthians 4:17 (NIV)
God Has You Covered
Posted on August 22, 2025 Leave a Comment
After 31 days away from Facebook, I’m back. Not because my health was at its worst, but because I needed a reset and some quiet space. Six weeks ago, I had a steroid injection that brought much-needed relief on my left side. Another one is scheduled soon. Overall, my health is about as good as […]
Such a Roller Coaster Ride
Posted on August 12, 2025 Leave a Comment
My pain is so unpredictable. One minute it feels bearable, and the next my entire body feels like it’s 100 years old. Every time I think it’s under control, it suddenly spirals out of control again. Today has been especially hard to swallow. It feels as if someone lit a match inside my whole body—every […]
God’s Grace is Enough
Posted on July 15, 2025 Leave a Comment
My recent steroid injection is giving me more relief with each passing day. Along with my pain decreasing, my stress is decreasing. Through my pain, God drew me back closer to Him. I can feel His hand upon me with each breath. Each day, I’m waking up simply seeking to be faithful with what God […]
Woken Up for Prayer
Posted on July 5, 2025 Leave a Comment
It’s 3:00 a.m., and the pain in my left side has woken me up. This is new for me, and it’s throbbing nonstop. I had been sleeping deeply, but my heating pad was off. It became the perfect storm that suddenly flooded my body with pain. Next week’s steroid injection can’t come soon enough. Only […]
Keep Enduring by Faith
Posted on July 5, 2025 Leave a Comment
My back and body have been giving me fits all day. I tried to grab a bite to eat with my wife and son, and I thought we might go see some fireworks together. However, my body quickly changed those plans. I could barely sit at the table to eat. Now, I’m back home by […]
Making Memories
Posted on June 26, 2025 Leave a Comment
No matter what life throws your way, you’ve got to seize the moments God gives you. These days, I can only do about 25% of what I used to—but even still, I don’t dwell on what I can’t do. I choose to keep striving, doing what I can, while I can. I pray my boys […]
Pain Limits Your Options
Posted on June 26, 2025 Leave a Comment
The past couple of weeks of resurgent pain have been very tough to swallow—physically, emotionally, mentally, and relationally. Life-altering pain can wreck you in so many different ways. It puts you in handcuffs without a moment’s notice. It leaves you begging for relief at any time it chooses. Somehow, I forgot how bad it could […]
God Will Make a Way
Posted on June 25, 2025 Leave a Comment
We’ve been on a lot of cruises over the years. However, none of them ever had a bathtub. Not only is our Disney ship stateroom twice the size of any other cruise line we’ve experienced, but it also has a full bath and shower room—plus a separate toilet and sink area. During any given week […]
I’ve Experienced Some Breakthrough
Posted on June 24, 2025 Leave a Comment
Yesterday, from morning until late at night, was incredibly rough. By the time I went to bed, my pain level had skyrocketed—it felt like a knife was lodged deep in my left hip. I had to double up on my medication and eventually drifted off to sleep. When I woke up at 11 a.m. this […]
Need a Big Favor
Posted on June 23, 2025 Leave a Comment
I’m currently on the road for a five-day getaway with my wife and youngest son. I’m asking for your prayers—specifically for the pain in my lower back to ease up. The sharp pain on my left side takes my breath away, and my head continues to ache, as if the spinal fluid leak isn’t fully […]
Loaded with Inflammation
Posted on June 21, 2025 Leave a Comment
I’m no longer suffering from my spinal fluid leak, which is a major relief. However, I’m now on my second day of feeling absolutely loaded with inflammation. The discomfort in my hips, back, shoulders, and neck has been about a 7 out of 10. This is likely a byproduct of the intense stress that accompanied […]
Some Challenges and Many Improvements
Posted on June 18, 2025 1 Comment
While I’m still dealing with the aftermath of a spinal fluid leak, there have been many encouraging improvements. First, my head no longer feels like it could explode. Instead, it just feels a little heavy and foggy as the fluid continues to drain from my system.Second, my lower back no longer feels like it’s been […]
A Father’s Day ER Visit
Posted on June 16, 2025 Leave a Comment
Literally, by the absolute grace of God, I made it through this morning’s services. Last night, spinal fluid was gushing through my head. All I could do was keep my head leaned back until I finally passed out asleep. When I got up this morning, I knew only God could make it possible for me […]
God Use My Life
Posted on June 15, 2025 Leave a Comment
Overall, I’m doing wonderful in my mind and heart. I’m grateful for what’s not going wrong. For some reason it still feels like I’ve got something stuck in my lower back. I just can’t stay up on my feet long without my lower back not feeling like it could give. All that said, God’s peace […]
Dear Dad 2025
Posted on June 14, 2025 Leave a Comment
It’s another Father’s Day without you here with us. Man, do I miss getting to see you, talk with you, and just getting a hug from you. You’re not thought of any less in your physical absence—instead, you live in my heart and thoughts more than ever before. They say, “Hindsight is always 20/20.” In […]
I Needed a Good Cry
Posted on June 14, 2025 Leave a Comment
Today has not gone as smoothly as I expected. I had hoped to wake up feeling much better than I did yesterday. But it turns out my recent myelogram really stirred up my nervous system. I’ve been feeling buzzing from my spinal cord stimulator in places I’ve never felt it before. I’ve also felt extremely […]
What If This Never Happened?
Posted on June 13, 2025 Leave a Comment
We were gone nearly eight hours today so I could get a CT myelogram done at the hospital. Unfortunately, the process and discomfort were worse than I remembered. If only the spinal cord stimulator company had told the truth. They promised the battery they implanted in my back was MRI-compatible. Instead, time would prove that […]
A Breakthrough Day
Posted on June 12, 2025 Leave a Comment
Today has definitely been a turning point on several fronts. I woke up very groggy, with my hands burning, and praying I could overcome today’s anxieties. But I didn’t need to take any Valium or extra muscle relaxers — a huge win. Plus, I received great news from two of my doctors. I had a […]
I Must Process Things Further
Posted on June 11, 2025 Leave a Comment
Normally, I write on behalf of others. This time, I need to air some things out for myself. Most of my posts don’t come close to revealing the full extent of my suffering. It’s just so hard to endure, share, and even acknowledge during these times. Tonight, I did everything possible to make things go […]
Be Still, Just Breath
Posted on June 10, 2025 Leave a Comment
Outside of the pure misery, I just can’t handle much right now. I’ve lost all my physical confidence for the moment. This time has truly taken me off guard. I feel like a fish out of water that is fighting to just breathe. The past two days my pain has been insane. Physically, mentally, and […]
Dealing with Chronic Pain
Posted on June 7, 2025 Leave a Comment
You wake up to it and go to bed with it. What you can and cannot do is often dictated by it. One moment you feel somewhat normal. The next moment reality surges through your body once again. This is just a glimpse of what’s it’s like dealing with chronic pain. Often, it’s only when […]
I Finally Got A Diagnosis!
Posted on May 29, 2025 Leave a Comment
Based on all my past medical information, ongoing symptoms, pictures of breakouts, and blood work, I finally have very clear diagnosis. My allergy specialist says I have “Chronic Autoimmune Urticaria”. There is no cure or way to fully control it. However, Dupixent and Zyrtec is the best I can do to keep things under control. […]
Pressing Through Your Pain
Posted on May 24, 2025 Leave a Comment
I only write here when I feel deeply led. My prayer is that anything shared might encourage someone. I know some who follow my page can totally relate to my struggles. I know some others have no clue what life altering pain feels like. So, here is my unfiltered processing of what it’s like in […]
When Pain Holds You Hostage
Posted on May 24, 2025 Leave a Comment
The hardest part about a broken body is it holds you hostage. You can’t escape the pain you feel. Often it leaves you squirming and praying for the pain to ease up. Days can be tough and nights even worse. Honestly, I can’t remember what it feels like to not be in some level of […]
Wow, What a 5 Months!
Posted on May 23, 2025 Leave a Comment
No wonder age 50 has made me feel like I’m 150 at times. In just 5 months, I’ve seen just about every kind of doctor out there. I’m trying to discover the true source of my skin outbreaks. I’m trying to discover whether my osteoporosis has advanced. I’m trying to see what has deteriorated any […]
When Your Suffering Continues
Posted on May 14, 2025 Leave a Comment
Anyone fighting a chronic health issue knows the battle never ends. You may have a great day or a great night. You may get to a greater place of healing and coping. You may reach a greater place of peace, but the hurting always sticks around. You would think after a decade of debilitating pain, […]
When You Don’t Know
Posted on May 3, 2025 Leave a Comment
Nobody feels great when absolutely nothing feels certain. This is especially true when it comes to your health. Over the past 10 years I’ve had a lot of “I don’t know” days. Now, here I am again feeling that way once again. I want to know what seems to be in my bloodstream. I want […]
I Didn’t Get a Choice
Posted on May 2, 2025 Leave a Comment
I understand many people do things to contribute to their pain or illness. However, there are many of us who did nothing to create such life altering pain. Such pain can make everything you do extremely difficult. It can leave you breathless, shaking your head and begging God for relief. Trust me, I’ve lived with […]
Pain Travels, God Travels
I’ve been a part of the severe chronic pain club for over 10 years. I didn’t choose to become a member. However, it’s now a huge part of my life. I still have to process my pain daily and deal with it every hour I’m awake. No matter where I go my pain travels with […]
Such A Painful Reality
Posted on April 21, 2025 Leave a Comment
First, I want to thank God for helping me make it through three Easter weekend services. Despite not having any caffeine, I was able to stay focused and deliver God’s word. I spent countless hours seeking what God wanted me to preach. I also spent lots of time praying for God to move in a […]
My Crazy Reaction to Caffeine
Posted on April 18, 2025 Leave a Comment
You would think by now, I would know better. I’ve had this happen so many times in years past. I put a couple cups of caffeine in my system both yesterday and today. I just needed a clear mind as I prepared for this weekend’s Easter services. Tonight, it finally throttled my entire nervous system. […]
Neurologist Visit Went Well
Posted on April 11, 2025 Leave a Comment
Finally, I feel my nerves will be adequately tested. With my extensive nerve damage this neurologist visit was long over due. We thoroughly went over my past and present issues. In early May they will do a total body nerve conduction study. They will do a (BLE) Bilateral Lower Extremity test. They will do a […]
God is Restoring Me
Posted on April 3, 2025 Leave a Comment
I’ve definitely felt battle weary all day. But with every step forward, I’ve gotten much better. God is holding back the raging waters once again. I feel myself getting stronger and stronger. I can still feel heat flooding my hands and face. However, I’ve not had any big breakdown all day. I still haven’t drank […]
When the Pain is Insane
Posted on April 2, 2025 Leave a Comment
I know I’m on the right track. I know I’m seeking God’s will. I know I’m doing everything possible to take care of this nerve wrecked body. But there are so many times this pain drives me absolutely insane. The last several hours alone have been as bad as ever. My entire skin from head […]
How Caffeine Can Affect You
Posted on April 1, 2025 Leave a Comment
I do everything I can to measure the impact of anything I drink or eat. I will be scheduled for an allergy test very soon. I believe it will confirm or reveal some things I speculate could be triggering my unexplainable skin rashes. Especially since my nerve damage makes my body super sensitive to so […]
Back In God’s Workshop
Posted on April 1, 2025 Leave a Comment
I’ve been so blessed compared to so many. God has pulled me out of so many pits. He has taken me through so many seemingly unbearable seasons. Every time He has made me stronger through the trials. Here I am back in God’s workshop. I have way more questions than answers. My body once again […]
Not Doing Too Well
Posted on March 31, 2025 Leave a Comment
I try to refrain daily from just talking continuously about my health issues. However, I’ve reached another season where I must request intercessory prayer. I’ve seen God come through in miracle fashion before and I know more miracles are to come. Unfortunately, I’ve been feeling very miserable in recent days. For the past few months […]
8 Health Steps Forward
Posted on November 12, 2024 Leave a Comment
My health has really been struggling lately. Keeping my nerve wrecked body pain free is truly a full time job. From sun up to sun down, I have to calculate every move. I feel like I’m walking on a very thin balance beam with very little room for error. For a good while my health […]
God’s Grace is Sufficient
Posted on November 4, 2024 Leave a Comment
I never started this page for myself, but to truly help others. I want my pain story to encourage others through their story. I want everything I share to bring God all the glory. That said, I have to get over my pride and keep processing things when the Holy Spirit leads. Yesterday, I experienced […]
Take Care of Yourself
Posted on November 2, 2024 Leave a Comment
I’m happy to report that I am doing much better than a few days ago. Over 48 hours ago, I started back on the diet that changed my life back in 2019. I’m back on a total non-inflammatory diet. So far it’s been just what I needed during a very painful season. By God’s grace […]
Prayer, Peace, Progress
Posted on October 30, 2024 Leave a Comment
Today has been very long. I went to my orthopedic appointment with mixed emotions. I was very prayerful every step of the way. I prepared myself to communicate things clearly as possible. I knew my doctor’s assistant would truly care and give me the best guidance as possible. I started out trying to explain how […]
Weary, Discouraged, Hopeful
Posted on October 29, 2024 Leave a Comment
I’m not sure where to even begin with this post. There must be someone out there who needs to hear these words. As a person of strong faith, I don’t want to ever sound like I’m only complaining. However, the truth is I’m feeling very tortured and discouraged. I still have no idea why my […]
God Deliver Me Again
Posted on October 25, 2024 Leave a Comment
I believe most of us can identify with the following words. If it ain’t one thing it’s another. Unfortunately, that continues to be the same case with my health. The pain in my lower back has been bearable as long as I stay on a heating pad. My overall nerve pain has felt mostly under […]
Overwhelming Suffering
Posted on September 13, 2024 Leave a Comment
I just finished having another major earthquake inside of my entire body. I had just completed Sunday’s sermon prep. Next thing I knew, every nerve inside my body felt electrocuted. Just imagine someone unplugging all of the nerves within you. Then, plugging each of them into the wrong outlets, leaving you gasping for relief. My […]
MY BACK IS ON FIRE 🔥
Posted on September 9, 2024 Leave a Comment
The inflammation in my lower back has been rising and rising the past few days. I’ve pretty much been staying on heat or ice constantly. Early this morning, I knew I was in for a very long day. Not just because my entire day would be busy. But, I just knew my deep pain was […]
When Your Pain Won’t Stop
Posted on August 29, 2024 Leave a Comment
One thing has proven to be true the past 8 years of my life. My health will never be the same this side of Heaven. I do about everything a human can to improve my health condition. However, permanent nerve damage throughout my body makes everything difficult. I absolutely hate admitting this fact. However, I’m […]
Another Unexpected Divine Moment
Posted on August 15, 2024 2 Comments
Right now I’m lying on ice. I’m recovering from another epidural steroid injection. I’m now having to get them done every three months. However, I praise God they are able to relieve some of my pain. They literally make the difference in me being able to get up and about. Earlier, due to very heavy […]
Back on the Pain Train
Posted on July 20, 2024 Leave a Comment
Well, it’s been quite awhile since I’ve written about my pain. I guess that in itself is a praise report. It’s not that I’ve not had pain, but the pain has not been holding me hostage near as much. However, this week I’ve been living on the pain train. Anyone who has been in this […]
God Keeps Restoring
Posted on June 2, 2024 Leave a Comment
Sorry I’ve not been in contact more. I’ve just needed to get myself back on track. The past 2 weeks knocked a lot out of me. But, God has restored my health once again. Surprisingly my ribs are much much better. I believe what happened was just caused by me suddenly pouncing over the side […]
Nights Aren’t Easy Anymore
Posted on May 30, 2024 Leave a Comment
My days have been okay and my ribs seem to be healing very well. However, the moment I lay down to rest my right side hurts so much. It’s like I have nothing to protect my bruised or fractured ribs. This has been the case for eight nights straight and sleep is not coming easy […]
God Keeps Answering Prayers
Posted on May 26, 2024 Leave a Comment
I’ve had one of my toughest weeks ever between my physical pain and emotional challenges. I’ve had so many up and down moments. All I could do was call out to the Lord for help. God keeps answering so many prayers. He has proven His faithfulness over and over again. God gave me the strength […]
Keep On Praying Please
Posted on May 24, 2024 Leave a Comment
Ministry for me lately has been very overwhelming. In fact, tomorrow I will preach the most difficult funeral I’ve ever preached or attended. I believe God plans to work in a mighty way. I don’t have any magic words, but I do have God’s word. I’m wholeheartedly seeking to let God have His way in […]
Lift Me Up Please
Posted on May 22, 2024 Leave a Comment
Monday night and all day Tuesday have been very rough. This time my greatest pain is coming from an unexpected direction. Monday I went fishing and really enjoyed some much needed quiet time with God. Then, came another rib cracking moment. Two years ago, I fractured a rib on my left side twice in a […]
Another In The Fire
Posted on April 30, 2024 Leave a Comment
My physical pain itself is not more than usual. However, this level of neuropathy can drive you completely crazy. My hands, feet, and face feel on fire. For this particular issue I’m hoping Benadryl and time will calm the fire. Fortunately, my actual nerve pain has been staying under control most days. This has been […]
I Can’t Stop Crying
Posted on April 25, 2024 Leave a Comment
I knew when my daddy passed away certain days would come. Days when I just wanted to share “GOD” news with him. Days that conversations would have to be saved for Heaven. However, knowing that has not stopped the tears from flooding down my face. In fact, I can barely see to write this message […]
IT’S BEEN A WHILE
Posted on April 21, 2024 Leave a Comment
Anyone who has dealt with severe chronic pain long, can relate to my post. Once you experience major breakthrough you never wish to go back in time. Sure, you remember the days of such struggle, heartache and stress. However, you hope your health never severely declines again. Last night my health totally crumbled again. The […]
I Know It’s Exhausting
Posted on March 20, 2024 1 Comment
Well, I know it’s been awhile since I’ve talked about my pain. There are a few reasons that’s been the case. One, I’ve been having more good days than bad overall. Two, when things have been really bad I just didn’t have the strength to share. Three, I really try hard not to feed my […]
God Will Help You
Posted on March 8, 2024 Leave a Comment
This week has not been good on my nerve pain at all. Since Monday morning, I’ve had a whole lot of flared up nerves. I’ve discovered so many things that can escalate things to new heights. However, nothing cranks things up more than anxiety and stress. Sometimes the only reason I don’t write about things […]
14 Days Seeking God More
Posted on February 19, 2024 Leave a Comment
Well, I will turn 49 years old on March 4th. Wow, just writing that number down gives me a lot to ponder. However, I’ve never been more excited with what the future holds. God has me seeking Him more than ever before. So many God things are happening daily. Ministry wise I’ve got a little […]
Sickness Finally Caught Me
Posted on February 14, 2024 Leave a Comment
Well, after dodging sickness for many months it finally caught me. I started feeling light headed late Sunday night. Then, Monday came and I was really feeling bad. Then, Tuesday came and I felt even worse. I wasn’t able to get a local doctor’s appointment before today. So, I just let my wife be my […]
Suddenly Zapped Again
Posted on February 12, 2024 Leave a Comment
I’ve gone 3 1/2 days without my nerve pain crashing me. Seems I’ve found the right medications and routine that is working for me. However, time always proves that my stimulator, medications, steroid injections, and routines are just tools. They only cover things up that never really go away. Today I’ve had a very productive […]
Another Super Sunday Ahead
Posted on February 11, 2024 Leave a Comment
My nerve pain has been under control for the past two days. After a minor medication adjustment I’m doing much better. I’m also sleeping much better. However, I’m having to put myself to bed much earlier than usual. Tonight I’m going to bed very grateful for my pain relief. I’m also feeling very dependent on […]
Things That Can Aggravate Nerve Pain
Posted on February 8, 2024 Leave a Comment
Why is nerve pain worse at night?By Dr. Bussell It can seem like living with chronic nerve pain is a never-ending merry-go-round of discomfort. With a constant struggle during the day, why does it seem to flare up at night? Let’s take a closer look at why pain comes in droves when the sun comes […]
He Is With You
Posted on February 8, 2024 Leave a Comment
I’ve had a very decent and productive day. However, something is definitely buzzing like crazy in my nervous system. My hands feel like they are 100 degrees. My hands, legs, and feet continue to vibrate. I hate it when I have no clue how to stop it. I prayed a lot more than usual today. […]
The Battle Never Ends
Posted on February 7, 2024 Leave a Comment
Battling with chronic pain day after day can be so exhausting. In fact, it can be quite discouraging. It sucks the joy out of so many things. No matter where you go unfortunately your body goes with you. Unfortunately, you can’t take a break from a battle that is living within you. Seems my physical […]
Posted on February 5, 2024 Leave a Comment
Monday Morning Hangovers Being a minister in today’s world can easily deplete you. It feels like you’re always counseling someone, intervening in a crisis or preparing a sermon. After awhile it feels like your days simply run together and you lose track of time. However, no day feels more draining than a Sunday. You prepare […]
Everything Keeps Improving
Posted on January 30, 2024 Leave a Comment
The past few days I’ve felt the healthiest I have in quite some time. This is a result of several things coming together at once. One, the steroid shot I received 12 days ago has given me maximum relief. Two, I’ve been eating much healthier the past 7 days. Thirdly, I’m back to exercising daily. […]
Resting In His Strength
Posted on January 23, 2024 Leave a Comment
Over the past 14 days God has proven that He alone is my strength. Somehow, He helped me to preach at 4 funerals, 4 worship services, and to minister into countless situations daily. In the past, my nerves would’ve completely gone over the edge. Only by God’s grace did I not completely fall apart. When […]
God Supplies Our Strength
Posted on January 21, 2024 Leave a Comment
This morning marked three days since my last steroid injection. I woke up feeling really good. My mind was clear and it felt like someone put a generator inside of me. I knew God had given me the answer to so many prayers. I thank God for everyone who lifted me up in prayer. After […]
Another Injection Tomorrow 🙏
Posted on January 18, 2024 Leave a Comment
Tomorrow will be 16 days since my last steroid injection. In the morning, I will get another injection to build on the last. Overall, I’m much better than I was prior to the last infection. However, bending straightforward is not an easy task. In fact, not bending forward is what has kept my pain under […]
I AM SO RELIEVED
Posted on January 11, 2024 Leave a Comment
I’m just getting home from seeing my pain specialist. They told me I would definitely be able to have another steroid injection asap. I was told this is not abnormal to get a second injection so soon. Due to such high level of inflammation the second injection will need to build on top of the […]
God Works Things Out
Posted on January 11, 2024 Leave a Comment
I’ve been up since early this morning. Ice and heat remain two of my best friends. I’ve been swallowing my disappointment and discomfort all day. However, I’ve kept things in prayer mode and trying to keep taking the next right step. I contacted my pain specialist to discuss the pain that has returned in my […]
Not Out The Woods Yet
Posted on January 10, 2024 Leave a Comment
Well, I’m not sure where I am right now in my pain journey. I definitely experienced significant relief initially from my steroid injections. However, just seven days later I’m shaking my head in disbelief. It appears there is still very significant muscles pulled in my lower back. Like it’s just pinned underneath the metal in […]
Everyday Is Brighter
Posted on January 6, 2024 Leave a Comment
It’s now been exactly 84 hours since my steroid injections. Overall, I’m a whole new person compared to my previous state. I can sit up myself with no problem. I can now do some stretching exercises. Everyday has been more promising than the day before. I can tell that due to whatever these shots are […]
GOD DID IT AGAIN
Posted on January 4, 2024 Leave a Comment
As I lay here on Ice this morning I can’t help but look up to Heaven with Thanksgiving. Today, marked exactly 14 days since I’ve been able to bend over and put both socks on by myself. Well, that streak just ended my friends. Theses steroid shots continue to renew me hour by hour. It’s […]
5 Things I Choose To Believe
Posted on January 1, 2024 Leave a Comment
Heading into 2024 full of back spasms and still not able to bend over. I’ve been relying on ice, heat, epsom salt, tens units, pain medications, and faith things will change. This is definitely not my first rodeo so I know things will get better in God’s perfect timing. I can’t wait to get my […]
Heading Into A New Year
Posted on December 30, 2023 Leave a Comment
Over the years I’ve always been excited about New Year’s Day. Not because it’s just another big day to celebrate. Mainly because it feels like a great opportunity for new beginnings. Of course, I hope to reduce my love affair with Little Debbies. However, my biggest goal is to become more of the man God […]
Continuing To Faith Walk
Posted on December 29, 2023 Leave a Comment
It’s been another long day, but also a God made day. Putting on my own socks and shoes is still quite a challenge. Leaning forward period still hurts really bad. However, besides my lower back the rest of my body is doing much better. I’ve really been helped by therapy, adjustments, rest and continuing to […]
Walking Through Fiery Trials
Posted on December 28, 2023 Leave a Comment
For about an hour earlier I had no major pain. It felt like I could finally breathe again. Now, that extra pain medication is no longer working. It feels like all the pain has come rushing back into my body. I’ve found myself back in a place that I had forgotten. I forgot how it […]
Sometimes It’s Just Harder
Posted on December 28, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’ve still been nursing extremely pulled muscles in my lower back. The past 48 hours I’ve iced my back countless times. It’s the only thing that runs out the pain. However, I’ve been miserable anytime I’m not knocked out asleep. Tomorrow will be 6 days I’ve battled this different and extra pain. I woke up […]
Blessed & Broken
Posted on December 26, 2023 1 Comment
This post is mainly for those who are presently walking through severe chronic pain. You feel like most don’t understand. You feel like most can’t see past your friendly smile. You feel like words can’t fully describe what you are feeling inside of your body and mind. Trust me I totally understand. Nothing has been […]
Grateful for God’s Grace
Posted on December 25, 2023 Leave a Comment
It’s been a long, but God made day. Getting out of the bed before 6am was extremely hard for my body. However, there was no way I was missing today’s Christmas Eve Services. I knew I had prepared myself as much as possible. I also knew the only way I could make it was relying […]
Feeling More Hopeful
Posted on December 23, 2023 Leave a Comment
I want to thank everyone for your continuous prayers. Please pray that God continues to take the edge off this discomfort. Pray that my pain doesn’t serve as any distraction for both upcoming Christmas Eve services. I feel very prepared for what God has given me to preach. I just need my mind and body […]
What A Long Day
Posted on December 23, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’ve had to continue taking muscle relaxers every 8 hours. I just don’t have any choice right now. Getting up, sitting up, and even lying down is still very uncomfortable. The muscles in my lower back and shoulders are going off like fireworks. My body and mind are exhausted from a long day of battling […]
Satan Found Another Window
Posted on December 22, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’ve actually had a really great week overall. My nerve pain has stayed under control. Despite anything I’ve eaten or how much I’ve had on my shoulders. However, I should know by now that Satan is always looking for another window to knock my down. I usually never lift anything more than five pounds per […]
Rest, Pray, Trust
Posted on December 17, 2023 Leave a Comment
Sometimes the air is just knocked out of your sails. Pain can make everything feel like a battle. Pain can drain your strength and emotions. You can feel so battle weary that it’s hard to even pray. However, it’s in those moments we all desperately need prayer. I’ve experienced all of these things the past […]
Pray With Me Please
Posted on December 14, 2023 Leave a Comment
After 30 plus years as a minister God has richly blessed me with so many opportunities these days. Daily God puts me in position to be His instrument to so many crisis situations. In my heart, I want to help every possible soul. However, time and my health issues have made it clear I have […]
What’s Your Thorn?
Posted on December 11, 2023 1 Comment
Last night I had another extremely tough night. In fact, I was in the bed by 7pm because every nerve within me was fried. All I could do was wave my white flag and say help me Lord. Praise God I was able to get to sleep rather quickly. I believe it was due to […]
Another Breakthrough for Asher
Posted on December 10, 2023 Leave a Comment
Well, my little buddy finally hurdled another barrier. He has struggled so much emotionally the past two days when it came to removing all his knee bandages. After a few intense hours he can finally breathe a sigh of relief. Not only was everything removed, but he took his first shower in 7 days. He […]
It Breaks Your Heart
Posted on December 9, 2023 Leave a Comment
So, it was time to look at taking Asher’s bandages off of his knees. Sadly, as soon as Asher saw all the blood he freaked out. He just kept crying as his anxiety went through the roof. He didn’t even want me to pray beside him tonight. For me these have been the toughest moments. […]
Little Faith Walker’s Progress
Posted on December 9, 2023 Leave a Comment
Well, it’s now been a little over 4 days since Asher’s recent surgery. This surgery definitely brought him much more pain than the one before. He kept telling us that his left foot was hurting so much more than his right ever did right after surgery. He said it felt like someone just dropped a […]
My Growing Faith Warrior
Posted on December 5, 2023 Leave a Comment
We finally made it home from the Shriner’s Hospital for Children in Greenville, SC. Over the past 7 months my 13 year old has endured so much physically. He’s now had surgery on both feet, both calves and both knees. Basically from the knee down desperately needed to be realigned. Plus the issues created by […]
Always Hard To Swallow
Posted on December 1, 2023 Leave a Comment
For the first time in a few years we’ve got all four of our boys together on one trip. Even my daughter in love made it to Orlando. My youngest son Asher wanted to take a trip to his favorite place before his next big surgery. So, on Wednesday afternoon we all travelled to Universal […]
My Little Pastor
Posted on November 27, 2023 Leave a Comment
My Little Pastor Today, I experienced something very special. Towards the end of my 2nd worship service message, I experienced quite an emotional roller coaster ride. The spirit of God was churning within me. God’s grace in my continued pain journey was realized more than ever. While I may have been preaching to others, God […]
I’m Doing Very Well
Posted on November 16, 2023 Leave a Comment
Many have reached out wondering how I was doing. Therefore, I thought it was best I give this update. God has been in the process of rearranging a lot inside of me. I’ve had to go back to living with healthy boundaries so that I can actually be healthy. Anyone with my level of chronic […]
Stepping Away Until Further Notice
Posted on November 8, 2023 Leave a Comment
My health has once again demanded a total reset in my life. I can’t deny the fact that anything can flare my nerves further at this time. So, I’m going to step away from all social media for quite awhile. I’m also going to step away from anything not absolutely necessary in my life. I’ve […]
Peaceful Moments
Posted on November 8, 2023 Leave a Comment
Typically, I only write things to process deep pain and encourage others through their pain. I’m usually writing while in the vice grips of misery. I’m holding on to hope, but still longing for relief. Right now, I’m writing from a place of great peace, comfort, and gratitude. My night time meds have settled all […]
Just Be Still
Posted on November 7, 2023 Leave a Comment
I slept okay last night and my body woke me up really early. By God’s grace I’ve gutted out another long day of ministry. However, something is just not holding down my extra nerve pain. I’ve got a nonstop burning sensation running throughout my nerves. My excessive nerve pain seems to escalate early afternoon each […]
When You Can’t Run Away
Posted on November 6, 2023 Leave a Comment
I can’t count how many times I’ve wished running away from my own body was possible. Lying here feeling like every nerve you have is on fire never feels good. Other than knocking yourself completely out with medication all you can do is pray. Severe chronic pain is something I don’t wish on anyone. I […]
Full Circle Moments
Posted on November 6, 2023 Leave a Comment
I can’t help but think my daddy would be smiling his head off today. He served over 45 years as a faithful pastor. He and mom dedicated their lives to serving the Lord. They were living examples of two imperfect dedicated people, following daily a perfect savior. Today, God led me back to one of […]
What’s On Your Nerves?
Posted on November 1, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’ve had a very long day of ministry. However, I thank God for the strength He has given me. The fact that God can still use me in my shipwrecked condition still amazes me. I’m definitely able to lay my head down in peace knowing I’ve given God my all today. Due to my health, […]
Another Stormy Day
Posted on October 30, 2023 Leave a Comment
I typically try not to do anything more than necessary on a Monday. After Sunday services and a long week of ministry my body typically crashes. Today has been no exception. My wife helped me crawl out the bed after lying in bed close to 15 hours straight. Then, I immediately had to put some […]
PRAYING FOR YOU
Posted on October 27, 2023 Leave a Comment
For the one who is battling some overwhelming pain. For the one who is dealing with a life altering situation. For the one who feels all alone and like no one really understands. For the one who feels their situation is hopeless. For the one who just needs to know somebody cares and is praying […]
GOD WILL FIGHT FOR YOU
Posted on October 25, 2023 Leave a Comment
Like water to a thirsty soul my body is being replenished by my spinal cord stimulator. Minute by minute I can feel it it pouring it’s magic throughout my lower back, legs, and feet. What wisdom God gave man to create such a device. It revitalizes your nerves even if they are totally shipwrecked like […]
As Real As It Gets
Posted on October 24, 2023 Leave a Comment
This will be as real as I can get with most of you. Right now, I’m laying on my side just trying to catch my breath. Just 30 minutes ago, I was wrapping up several hours of sermon prep and other ministry efforts. Then, boom out of nowhere my entire body was wrecked again. Physically, […]
Brighter Days Coming
Posted on October 24, 2023 Leave a Comment
Many have reached out wondering how my day turned out. The short answer to that question is “long, but as well as possible.” I survived 16 1/2 hours without my stimulator running. Fortunately, I was able to sleep over 10 hours straight of that time. Only once I woke up did I start feeling any […]
Another Big Faith Step
Posted on October 23, 2023 Leave a Comment
Earlier my spinal cord technician scheduled me a 12:15pm appointment tomorrow to get things readjusted. However, she has requested something for me to do prior to the new adjustment. She wants me to turn my stimulator off as soon as possible, so we can start over with a clean slate. For whatever reason tingling from […]
One of My Worst Nights Ever 🔥
Posted on October 22, 2023 Leave a Comment
Last night was definitely one of my absolute worst nights ever. Sometime between 12am and 2am is all I can truly reference. I thought I was just struggling to fall asleep. Next thing I know my entire body felt like someone lit it on fire from within. I remember desperately calling for my wife to […]
A Few Praise Reports
Posted on October 21, 2023 Leave a Comment
To continue positive momentum you have to recognize your blessings. In the midst of a lot of issues this past week, I’ve really had a lot of breakthroughs. There has just not been anything that could fix itself instantly. However, right now I’m still more encouraged than discouraged. First, I’ve been completely on top of […]
No Clue Right Now
Posted on October 21, 2023 Leave a Comment
I finally got my stimulator adjusted yesterday for the first time in 17 months. I was very excited for this appointment and very optimistic headed back home. The lady who has always made my adjustments for the past six years retired. So, instead of a veteran adjuster I had a very nice young lady who’s […]
Finally A God Made Night
Posted on October 19, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’m just waking up after nine wonderful hours of sleep. Last night, I was in bed by 7:45pm and fast asleep by 8pm. My body was desperate for rest and relief. It appears I’ve finally got my spinal cord stimulator back on track. Time keeps proving that without my stimulator my entire life would be […]
The Trials Keep Coming
Posted on October 18, 2023 Leave a Comment
At this point, I shouldn’t be surprised. Nothing is coming easy for me right now. This will be the fourth night in a row that has felt like a torcher chamber. This time there seems to be some kind of allergy underneath my skin. This allergy is creating a nonstop prickling and burning sensation in […]
I Can See Daylight
Posted on October 18, 2023 Leave a Comment
I finally got out of the house this evening. It was my first time out of the house going anywhere since Sunday. Everyday has been a battle and today was definitely no exception. I’ve had buzzing nerve pain all over my body most of the day. One of my boy’s birthday gathering inspired me finally […]
Another Painful Night
Posted on October 16, 2023 Leave a Comment
For the second night in a row I’m going to bed flooded with pain. It’s as if someone lit a match and threw it inside my lower body. My legs are aching and my nerve pain is raging. Fortunately, it’s been awhile since I’ve had back to back nights like these. God has been so […]
Time For Change Again
Posted on October 11, 2023 Leave a Comment
Five years ago, I went on an extreme diet that further helped my nerve pain get under control. In a little over 3 months I moved from weighing 205 lbs down to 165lbs. For the longest time, I never gained back more than 10 lbs. Then, eventually I gained back a total of 20 lbs. […]
One Day It Will Be Over
Posted on September 19, 2023 1 Comment
Having another one of those evenings where the pain has been rising and rising for hours. My lower back, hands, feet and face feel on fire. It knocked the wind clean out of me several hours ago. I wish the pain was only physical. However, what I’m feeling emotionally and mentally honestly feels worse. For […]
Sometimes I Forget
Posted on September 16, 2023 Leave a Comment
You would think I’d be used to this by now. However, time proves that intense pain always disrupts your life. I’ve been battling some resurrected pain in my left side all week. It keeps feeling like it’s going away, but lingers just enough to keep me miserable. This pain is in the same area that […]
Still Giving It All To Him
Posted on September 6, 2023 Leave a Comment
The past eight years of dealing with my nerve damage has felt more like eighteen. So many surgeries, rehab sessions, doctor appointments, shots, breakdowns, breakthroughs and life altering adjustments along the way. Just the journey to get back to my new normal has taken everything I’ve had to give and more. Fortunately, God has been […]
A Very Rare Night
Posted on August 27, 2023 Leave a Comment
Tonight I’m going to bed feeling the best I’ve felt in what seems like forever. Usually on a Saturday night my body becomes very anxious. I have felt God’s peace all day long. Physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually this is the strongest I’ve felt since I can even recall. Sure, I still have limitations I […]
God is so Good
Posted on August 26, 2023 Leave a Comment
My stimulator seems to be working consistently and is no longer over stimulating me. I’ve never been doing better when it comes to eating a daily anti- inflammatory diet. Not only am I staying away from inflammatory foods, but I’m eating foods that fight inflammation. Back to eating green leafy vegetables, berries, lean meats, nuts, […]
Taking The Mask Off
Posted on August 23, 2023 Leave a Comment
Well, the good news is I’m making some progress. The bad news is the past few days have been absolutely miserable. Honestly, I hate how extreme chronic pain torments and discourages you. Even when you’re full of faith it just stomps continuously on your heart. The longer the pain lingers the lower you feel inside. […]
The Pain Lingers Most Nights
Posted on August 22, 2023 Leave a Comment
I should’ve already gone crazy by now. Every night, I know it’s coming my way. My only hope is to get to sleep before the pain spirals out of control. This usually requires that I take plenty of nighttime meds and fall asleep quickly. It’s after 3am and my body is aching so deeply. I’m […]
Need Those Prayers Again
Posted on August 19, 2023 Leave a Comment
Well, my nerve pain has been very bad the last 2 days. Honestly, you would think that someone was frying my entire body inside with electricity. It’s been awhile since I’ve felt pain this deep level. Just like before it’s radiating from my feet into my face. I’ve been doing all I can today to […]
Praying Like A Child
Posted on August 6, 2023 Leave a Comment
A little while ago I called my 13 year old on his cellphone. I said, “you mind praying for God to give me great sleep, strength and a clear mind for both Sunday services?” He didn’t hesitate one bit to respond. He said, “I don’t mine praying for you at all.” Then, he started praying […]
Even On A Cruise
Posted on July 20, 2023 Leave a Comment
My wife and I are presently on a cruise together. We’ve been looking forward to this trip for quite sometime. By God’s grace, we will celebrate 26 years of marriage this August. This has been a wonderful time of refreshment and reflection. God keeps taking our relationship to deeper and deeper levels. Unfortunately, no matter […]
GOD IS ALWAYS WORKING
Posted on July 7, 2023 Leave a Comment
I realize some people just holler out “praise God” in regards to anything. However, my praise is not about me or just simple words about God. I have felt so much better today. Still dealing with some periodic mind fog. But, my nerve pain feels completely under control. Trust me, usually when I’m writing on […]
Empty But Hopeful
Posted on July 6, 2023 Leave a Comment
Well, it’s been another very long day. Lots of tossing, turning and leaning on God’s grace. Praise God, I was able to gain clarity in preparing this Sunday’s God led sermon. Also, I’ve always got a long list of things to do for so many I care about. That said, I’m definitely running on empty […]
My Daily Thorn
Posted on July 5, 2023 Leave a Comment
If you’ve never dealt with extreme chronic pain you simply can’t understand. The last few days have reminded me why I used to feel like I was going crazy all the time. It’s so hard being stuck in a body full of pain. Especially when you can’t change it or predict it from one moment […]
Making Progress
Posted on July 5, 2023 Leave a Comment
Today has been much better for me overall. I’ve been guzzling water and eating a whole lot smarter. I’ve been listening to my body and doing necessary exercises. I wanted to get out on my boat so badly today and yesterday. However, I knew it was best I just keep taking it easy physically speaking. […]
Keys To Coping
Posted on July 3, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’ve been in bed all day long. The root of all my nerve damage in my lower back keeps making everything unenjoyable. Fortunately, a hot heating pad or hot bath is able to keep the pain under control. However, the moment I take the heat off the pain comes rushing back. I don’t always know […]
Thank God For Strength
Posted on July 3, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’ve been battling this new found weakness for eight years now. It’s taught me a lot about life and myself. For instance, no one needs to convince me that I’m weak. I know I can’t even walk without God holding my hand. I know that life can knock you down in the blink of an […]
Prayerful and Thankful
Posted on July 1, 2023 Leave a Comment
I’ve spent all night and day in the bed. I’m doing my best to rest away this discomfort in my body. I believe I’m progressing and not regressing. Unfortunately, there is no quick fix once certain things get a hold of you. I’m not sad, mad, or glad about my health issues. I am certain […]
That’s Just Pain Speaking
Posted on July 1, 2023 Leave a Comment
No matter how many times you deal with a certain struggle. You never enjoy being in pain. Even when you know God has used it and is using it. Even when you know it will eventually pass. Even when you know God is in control. Pain has a way of drastically changing your emotions any […]
Running Into Walls
Posted on June 30, 2023 Leave a Comment
Sadly, God frequently has to give me reality checks. Anytime I go quite awhile without extreme pain I begin to think I’m fully healed. So, I go and do things that used to be normal and boy do I pay for my ignorance. Here I am again feeling like I’ve got a big brick stuck […]
Sleep Is Essential
Posted on June 28, 2023 Leave a Comment
You can do lots of exercise and take lots of steps. You can eat very healthy and drink lots of water. You can think positive and keep taking the next right step. However, no matter what you do or don’t do each day. You’ve got to make sure you get enough sleep. Now, I realize […]
Pastor Craig Crosby 