Feeling Misunderstood Hurts

Written: Jan 13th, 2018

Earlier I was in the middle of a simple conversation with my boys. Next thing I know I feel my nerve pain flooding throughout my body. It’s in that moment I know I need to cease conversation immediately and exit the room as soon as possible. Why? Because the moment my nerve pain takes over my body I will have little control over my emotional processing or mouth. The old me would have worked tirelessly to explain my condition. But, I’ve discovered that in most cases it will only further confirm that most just don’t understand.

So, I got in my car and headed home leaving everyone else at another family gathering that I hated to miss. I left away heartbroken, embarrassed, and definitely misunderstood. I cried most of the way home as I’ve felt this way so many times. I’ve concluded that if you look healthy people can’t believe you’re so sick. And, that unless someone has been in your specific battle they just can’t relate or understand. They mean nothing personal by their lack of understanding.

But, we each long to be understood and comforted. When we already feel like we’re on the edge of a bridge about to tumble down we need every bit of encouragement we can find. Praise God for a wife that did understand the urgency of my condition. She didn’t hesitate by saying, “Don’t worry about what other people might think. Do what’s best for you I know you wouldn’t leave if you didn’t feel so bad.” Just that little bit of understanding love helped me do what was necessary to settle my nerve pain.

The greatest thing you can do for someone going through a tough time you can’t totally understand is to love them with as much grace and encouragement as possible. In the process, you will lift their spirit instead of only crushing more of their heart.

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
Ephesians 4:29

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