I Surrender

White Flag

For reasons only God knows my body and mind remain under attack. This coming week I will have my back operated on for the third time in just twenty one months. I may not have any tattoos, but I’m building up a pretty good scar collection. I used to joke all the time that I may not have given birth, but according to my scars I’ve already had an A, B, C, D and E-section.

Unfortunately, it was discovered recently that my spinal cord stimulator battery I had implanted just seven months ago is not fully MRI friendly. So, scar section E will have to be reopened years before I expected and replaced with a new battery. The present battery has a life span of 7 to 10 years before replacement. But, the MRI friendly battery taking it’s place only last 2 to 3 years before another surgery replacement. The new battery is significantly larger than the present battery. Therefore, not only will they have to open an incision that took months to heal. They will have to cut me even more to make room for this larger battery. All this by the way is not my fault. I was told the battery I first had implanted was completely MRI friendly.

However, I have to say that each surgery has prepared me to better handle the next. My first major surgery was by far the worst. Then, the second one was bad, but it seemed nothing like the first. And, now while I don’t look forward to more incisions I feel stronger than ever going into this next surgery. Just because I don’t like the trials doesn’t mean God is not using each trial. He is building my endurance. He is elevating my faith. And, He is preparing me for other trials to come that hopefully don’t involve surgeons. It’s just the way God works and in the process makes us stronger.

“ Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.”
James 1:2-4

1 Comments on “I Surrender”

  1. I don’t know a lot, but what I do know is your fighting from Victory to victory pastor. From glory to glory!…We love you pastor and we are always praying!

    Like

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