Critical Thinking Paralysis

Depressed

It’s something I’ve done for years. In fact, I’ve helped well over a thousand plus process critical situations. It was a gift from God to be able to encourage and help others discern God’s best in some of life’s toughest moments. But, my present limitations just keep shutting me down. I mean that statement in a very literal way.

It always seems to catch me off guard. I can be talking to a family member, friend, or stranger. Then, boom my entire nervous system is rocked due to critical thinking. Practically any conversation that involves the slightest bit of stress or concern for something or someone can melt me in seconds internally. My body vibrates and aches within. I feel faint and all I can think is I need a Valium real quick.

I hate it so much because I know it makes no sense to others. However, it’s a reality that affects every aspect of my life. Even trying to prepare a Sunday sermon takes every ounce of energy and focus I can muster. What used to not be a challenge is now completely overwhelming. I ask God by the minute to help me deal with what feels like a form of mental and physical paralysis. Never more than now have I had to rely totally on God’s strength in the midst of my incredible weakness.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
Philippians 4:13

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