When Your Best Falls Short

Today every fiber of my humanity was exposed. Without warning my health failed and my nervous system totally wrecked. My spinal cord stimulator obviously quit keeping my nerve damage under control. Which for me is like taking oxygen from someone with severe COPD. I felt like crying my eyes out practically all morning.

I preached the best I possibly could while barely able to see through the thick fog inside my head. Deep within I always strive for perfection, but today all I could do was rest in the perfection of God’s grace. Not for a moment was I comfortable. Not for a moment did I feel an ounce of confidence. But, sometimes you just have to rest in the competence that only comes from above.

You’re not always going to feel in control. You’re not always going to be able to rely on yourself. In fact, every now and then God must allow us to fall. To realize that apart from Him we can do nothing. Apart from Him we’re bound to fall apart. Trust me, I hate looking like a fool who is far from having it all together. However, I do understand that it’s very important we realize our total dependence on Christ. Something I’m not sure we totally can until we’re broken, shattered, and desperate for divine intervention.

“It is not that we think we are qualified to do anything on our own. Our qualification comes from God. He has enables us to be ministers…” 2 Corinthians 3:5-6

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