Can I Get A Hot Tub?
Posted on December 21, 2017 Leave a Comment
12-18-17
Here I go again having to lay back in our jet tub. Seems I reach a point everyday where it’s the only thing that will calm my flaming nerves. I spend an average of two to three hours a day in a hot tub. Laying here brings such such peace to my body and mind. I thank God above for the relief amidst the chaos within my body.
But, there is only ONE that can bring peace to my soul. There is only ONE that can settle my fears of today or worries of tomorrow. There is only ONE that can bring me calmness no matter how my body feels. There is only ONE that can restore my strength once it’s depleted and my hope when doctors say it’s gone. His name is JESUS.
I praise God for giving me a Refuge in the storms of life. I praise God for giving me a constant peace in a life full of uncertainties. I thank God for sending Jesus to die for my sins and eternal salvation. I thank God that no matter what the crisis I can call on and count on Jesus to rescue me. All I have to do is free fall into His arms and let Him comfort and carry my heavy load.
“Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30
Miracle Of Mercy
Posted on December 21, 2017 Leave a Comment
Written: 12-17-17
Well today has been a pretty awesome day. Seeing God work around me, despite me and through me always lifts my spirits. I’m learning that I don’t have to be at my best for God to deliver His best. All I need to do is surrender the best I have to offer for God to use for His glory.
Right now I’m reminded of a song I use to listen to all the time. It’s by Steven Curtis Chapman and it’s called “Miracle Of Mercy.”
“If the walls could speak of the times I’ve been weak
When everybody thought I was strong
Could I show my face if it weren’t for the grace
Of the one who’s known the truth all along
If the walls could speak they’d say that my only hope is the grace
Of Jesus, the grace of Jesus
But, oh the goodness and the grace in Him
He takes it all and makes it mine and causes his light in me to shine
And he loves me with a love that never ends
Just as I am not as I do
Could this be real, could this be true
This could only be a miracle
This could only be the miracle of mercy.”
While I’m going bed exhausted. I’m going to bed with God’s peace that passes all understanding! A peace that only comes when you know you’ve put it all in His hands.
Suffering Is Everywhere
Posted on December 21, 2017 Leave a Comment
Written: 12/16/17
This post is less about my pain and more about awareness of the struggles of so many young and old. I’ve felt uncomfortable in my own body since early this morning. I’ve adjusted my spinal stimulator twice today and I’ve done everything to help better my situation. Still I wait second by second longing for relief from the constant physical torment. And while you might hear my cry for help there are countless silent cries throughout the world you may never hear.
There are so many fighting an addiction that stems from trying to cope with their pain. There are so many who feel stuck in an abusive relationship from Hell and they feel helpless. There are children all over who are living in environments that keep them with constant tears and fears. There are those who have given up that anyone even cares and who truly feel they would be better off dead than alive.
You see, pain comes in many forms. We need to see beyond our own pain. We need to realize that most we just see as trouble are most often troubled. Those we seek to alienate often need the most love and prayers. We need to pray for one another knowing each day is full of trouble. And, without Jesus none of us can make it through the next day.
“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your Christian brothers and sisters all over the world are going through the same kind of suffering you are.”
1 Peter 5:8-9
I Met A Man With No Hands
Posted on December 16, 2017 Leave a Comment
Recently, I was inside a store looking to buy some ginger bread houses. While searching the shelves I realized the boxes I needed were out of my reach. I then asked a gentleman on the other side if he would kindly hand me the boxes I needed. At first, he gave me a look like “ok I will try my best.” All I saw was his face at that time.
It wasn’t until he handed me the three items that I realized his limitations. One of his arms had no hand attached to it. The other arm had maybe two fingers still in tact. Even Still this man with a wonderful smile on his face handed me the items. I thanked him as I pondered how much more difficult life must be for him.
I couldn’t help but watch him in the check out line. You could tell many eyes were glued to the man who had no hands. From the shape this man was in I had to believe his accident had to be recent. He appeared to be someone who once has such great strength. Now, he’s looking around as he faces the challenge of putting all his items on the checkout counter without anything dropping. You could see the anxiety on his face.
God used this man to reshape my perspective. While my pain run deeps I’ve still got both hands. I can still hold my wife’s hand. I can still take one of my boys by the hand . I can still clap in celebration. I can still easily pick up light items and move them from point A to point B. Bottom line is I’ve still got my hands.
It’s amazing how God puts people in our path just to transform our perspective. To help us see that someone always has it worse than us. I walked away thanking God for my hands. And realizing that I’m even more blessed than what I could see at the moment. Thank God for the man with no hands.
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
Phillumenists 4:4-8
God Will Pick You Up
Posted on December 15, 2017 Leave a Comment
A little over 3 weeks ago I finally reached all I could take. I was truly having a nervous breakdown. My body was exhausted, my energy was gone, and my belief that anything would change was almost gone. I felt compelled to wave my white flag of surrender. I even concluded that I could not even preach on Sundays anymore.
Honestly, I was so low physically and emotionally that at best my prayers were only whispers in my mind. I had not totally lost faith, but I had certainly lost my ability to fight. I sought every bit of counsel I could from others who might bring comfort. I didn’t want to live in denial if my health had finally changed my future. I didn’t want to fall apart any further as so much was at stake. All I remember saying was “God, please help my unbelief. God resurrect my faith to trust what You can see even though I can’t.”
Over the next few weeks God began to restore my motivation towards my recovery. God began to rearrange my perspective. I was at least beginning to see my glass half full instead of just nearly empty. I remember one day recently just crying out “Jesus I Believe. I believe you can and will complete the work you’ve started in me.” I literally free fell into the arms of Jesus as I had totally reached the end of being able to carry myself.
I’m hear to tell you that God totally heard and answered my prayers. He reached into my heart and massaged it back to life. He took the blinders from my eyes and helped me see He is still at work. Today, He returned my hope the devil was determined to take away.
While nothing concerning my health has dramatically changed God has renewed my mind, heart, and hope. God has done a 180 within me and all I did was surrender everything to Him. You see, it’s in the moment that you truly give things up to God that He then picks you up. He will put the wind back in your sails and carry you where you can’t carry yourself.
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the fullest.” John 10:10
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” James 4:10
You Never Get Used To It
Posted on December 15, 2017 Leave a Comment
Written: 12/13/17
Right now my lower back feels like a huge piece of metal is misplaced inside. Oh, what I wouldn’t give for someone to take it out. Some people say that pain is just something you’ve got to put mind over matter. Well, unless I can be hypnotized I’ve found no way to totally ignore it. Certain levels of pain just scream out for your attention.
After over 2 years of this pain I’m no longer trying to ignore it, but rather live with it. To a great degree it changes much of life as I once knew it. I can no longer just sit down or lay down in any position very long. I’ve got to calculate my every move and consider anything that might increase or decrease the pain. I never have a moment the pain is not at least in the back of my mind. The only time I’m ever pain free is when I’m knocked out asleep with medication.
So, instead of trying to ignore my painful reality I’ve got to find the best ways to deal with it. I pray without ceasing for God’s comfort and strength. I speak often with others who might offer support and perspective. I seek to take things hour by hour and day by day. There’s no use in adding future worries with enough present concerns. The good news is I find time and time again God’s grace is sufficient. No matter how deep the pain goes God always has an answer. I’m sure He will carry you through your pain as well.
“I love you, Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I called to the Lord, who is worthy of praise,
and I have been saved from my enemies.”
Psalm 18:1-3
The ELEPHANT In The Church
Posted on December 13, 2017 Leave a Comment
Before you even get started reading this article I need to make something very clear. I believe very strongly in the church and its mission to tell the world about Jesus. Therefore, nothing I’m about to write has anything to do with putting any church down or comparing churches. I only write articles after God puts something heavy on my heart that needs to be spoken. So, here I go with speaking the cold, honest, truth about something being thought in churches all over the United States.
Earlier I had a lady share with me something very disturbing with tears filling her eyes. She said, “What do you do when you know the only reason you’re still going to your church is because you want to make sure no one takes your burial spot?” I responded, “Sadly you’re far from the first person that has ever told me that. In fact, it’s something that has been mumbled by many “use to be” faithful church goers for the past 20 years. But, it’s definitely starting to surface more and more as times get tougher.”
Understand that this wasn’t just any church goer. This was someone who’s been at the same church for over 65 years. This was someone who has maintained commitment through the good, bad, and now even worse. This was someone who would give anything she could to help her church withstand the test of times. But, even with her extreme commitment she realizes that her church is daily dying a slow death. The other seniors at her table chimed in by saying “We’ve got no future because we’ve hardly got anyone that is not a senior citizen.”
Now, I could write volumes about this subject matter and what must be done to turn things around. But, unfortunately most don’t want to accept the truth. The truth is that 80% of churches that exist today won’t still be here in the next decade or two. Why? Because most of them are simply existing. Meaning someone is still opening the doors, paying the light bill, and holding services. In the meantime, rarely do they ever see a new face along with seeing many old faces go away. This is indeed sad because many of these churches used to have great impact.
Sadly, most churches have become inward focused and forgot that the greatest mission happens outside the church. Sadly, most churches have continued with methods that haven’t worked for decades and therefore they’ve seen little fruit for decades. Sadly, most churches are full of people who operate with no clear vision and no clear mission. Sadly, most churches are full of just a handful of people who were taught to run a members-only club instead of a hospital for sinners like you and me. Sadly, most churches haven’t decided to do whatever it takes to reach people who are presently far from Jesus. Sadly, most churches will spend more time trying to defend their agenda instead of getting on board with God’s agenda.
Now, this article is not about comparing a traditional church with a contemporary church. Quite frankly to be contemporary simply means to be doing everything you can in the present to make an everlasting impact for Jesus Christ. It’s not about whether your church has pews or chairs. It’s not about whether your church sings hymns or has a full band. It’s about realizing that the church of today needs to wake up. We aren’t called just to turn the lights on, but to be light to those around us. We aren’t called just to gather with ourselves, but to always be genuinely concerned about those who aren’t gathering and desperately need Jesus. I pray in some way, shape, or form God uses this article to light a fire underneath every believer in Jesus Christ that makes up the church. We’re greater together than we are apart.
Jesus said, “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:19-20
Caught In A Storm
Posted on December 12, 2017 Leave a Comment
Every time I try to lay down it feels like I’ve gotta huge metal plate lodged in my lower back that just desperately needs to come out. Laying down simply exposes the pain and issues like nothing else. The past two days and nights are beginning to wear me down. Everything depends on me being able to rest well at night and being able to keep my nerve pain contained.
My legs have been killing me all day and it’s obvious the nerve pain is ramping up throughout my lower body. Right now I feel like I’m on a boat that is caught in a sudden storm. I see the waves crashing and I’m starting to get very motion sick. I’m also starting to get very concerned because I know I desperately need things to die down.
I know for certain Jesus is in the boat with me, but this storm is no joke. I’m trying to stand firm in my faith no matter how I feel. I know with just one word Jesus can calm this storm. While I’ve been in this kinda storm many times it never gets easy. All I know is their is only one way through and that’s by keeping my eyes on Jesus. Only He can calm the storm or His child.
“Then he got into the boat and his disciples followed him. Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!” He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm. The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him!”
Matthew 8:23-27
Let Faith Arise
Posted on December 12, 2017 1 Comment
Not having a good day with my back at all. It won’t allow me to sit in any position and even laying down on my side is barely bearable. Most every night is tough, but this is my first really bad day in a week. It’s amazing how after all this time the pain in my lower back is just as bad as it was 2 years ago.
While I’ve been able to find ways to improve everything else the actual root of my pain has never changed. I can accept having moments of discomfort the rest of my life. But, the level of pain in my lower back has got to change. I will be seeking out further professional opinions in time. And, I would be open to further surgery if that’s what it takes for a chance at greater relief.
But, I would never enter another major surgery without lots of insight and belief it’s the right step. Main thing is I can’t allow how that pain makes me feel physically to affect my approach to rehab mentally. I’ve gained some momentum the past 7 days and I don’t want to lose my recovery rhythm. It’s no easy task and only with God’s help can I keep moving forward.
“But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
Matthew 19:26
Her Support Is Everything
Posted on December 12, 2017 1 Comment
She watches me struggle day in and day out. She’s been observing my uphill climb of recovery for literally years now. But, she still does everything possible to help me up that hill. If it’s within her power she is willing to do it.
My wife has never made me feel worse. Instead she patiently just stays by my side assuring me I’m not alone. She has wiped many a tear. She has worked out many a tense muscle. And she has prayed over me when I literally felt no strength to pray for myself.
Even now the road ahead for my health feels so uncertain. But, what is certain is her commitment for better or worse. What is certain is her love which speaks loudly through every act of undeserved support. If she said “I quit” no one could blame her. Instead she just keeps being to me daily the arms, feet, and heart of Jesus. Aimée Crosby is no doubt my “Wonder Woman” sent down from Heaven above just for me. And, I thank God for her everyday.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
Ecclesiastes 3:9-12
Evil Has A Face
Posted on December 12, 2017 Leave a Comment
More than ever before in my life I feel I’ve seen the face of evil. I’m not just saying this because we’re living in troubled times. I’m not just saying this because of things I’ve only seen recently. I’m saying this because it took me many encounters to see the many faces of evil.
When you see someone full of hate you’ve seen the face of evil. When you see someone bound by destructive addiction you’ve seen the face of evil. When you see someone that is in such a dark place you can’t even describe it you’ve seen the face of evil. When you see anything you know a good, loving God would never endorse you’ve seen the face of evil. We’ve all had times we’ve looked into the mirror and we’ve seen the face of evil.
You see, evil is all around us. Not just in the obvious things, but in the less obvious. You see, Satan doesn’t want us to know it’s him so we’re often left to confusion. Satan is methodical and gradual in the way he attacks. He typically tries to sneak up on us if possible. That way he takes us down when we’re spiritually sleep walking and least expect it. Satan doesn’t want you to easily recognize his face because then you will surely run the other way.
Evil entices us with things it can never deliver. Evil leads us to believe that what scripture clearly says is wrong can’t be that bad. Evil seeks to get some control in hopes of gaining full control. And once evil is allowed to have control it destroys everything within its path.
So many are quick to believe there must be a God, but they want to believe there is no evil. My friends evil is not only everywhere, but there is an adversary. His name is satan and he is constantly looking for his next victim. You better stay alert and you better take him seriously. Otherwise you will be his next victim and the next face of evil. Through the power of Jesus Christ alone you can live victorious. But, if you try to walk alone you are bound to find yourself in the grips of the evil one. Often, the very one thinking they are in control is the very one satan knows he has total control over.
“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.”
1 Peter 5:8
“For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.”
Ephesians 6:12
A Sad World We Live In
Posted on December 12, 2017 Leave a Comment
Earlier I sought to pick up an item my wife ordered online on Craigslist. Of course, nether of us ever met personally the man she talked with by phone. All we knew was it was an older man who moved to the Low Country from Minnesota. He sounded totally harmless for sure. So coming upon the residence I had no major concerns.
After reaching his apartment parking lot the gentleman came out to my car. I knew he was supposed to put the item into my car due to my back issues. To my surprise he said, “Come on and follow me inside. I would love for you to meet my wife who has been battling Parkinson’s for over 7 years.” My heart couldn’t tell him no so I followed him to his apartment and then inside.
We had just walked through the living room towards the bedroom when suddenly my heart started racing. Red flags starting popping up and I just had to turn around. I said, “I’m sorry sir, but I don’t feel comfortable walking any further so I’ll just wait outside.” He seemed stunned by my response and I totally hated to not provide him and his wife with some much needed ministry of presence.
This 81 year old man did eventually come out to the car with the item my wife purchased. I said, “Sir, I would’ve loved to visit your wife, but I’ve just seen too much over time. I’m sure you are a stand up guy, but you just never know who you can trust in this day and time.” He said, “Oh I know it’s getting worse everyday.”
I could tell he was so overwhelmed as a caregiver and so lonely. I asked him could I pray with him and we bowed our heads right there in the parking lot. Afterwards I told him we certainly can’t put our faith in this world. Every time you turn around there is trouble at your door. We both agreed that we all need to look to Jesus if we ever want peace in the midst of such chaos. We then said our goodbyes and I wished him and his wife a very Merry Christmas.
Jesus said, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33
Control What You Can
Posted on December 2, 2017 Leave a Comment
My therapist just spoke some simple, but life changing truth into my life. He said, “I know you feel like you’re drowning in pain. And I know your pain affects every area of your life. But, instead of focusing on all you can’t control focus on what you can.” While nothing he said was new it renewed me at this time.
Sadly my pain has been my identity lately. And slowly but surely I’ve been consumed with my worries and discomfort.. I’ve quit walking daily to keep things moving forward. I’ve quit setting daily attainable goals with my recovery. I’ve quit thinking positive because quite honestly things have not been heading in a positive direction.
I see clearly how I’ve just got to return to doing the basics well. I’ve got to pull back out my journal and take daily notes of goals and progression. I’ve got to get back to consistently walking forward as it brings healing to both my mind and back. And, I’ve got to seek to do all I can while fully trusting God for all I can’t.
“Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 3:13-14
Deep Confessions Of A Pastor
Posted on November 30, 2017 Leave a Comment
depressed man sitting against the light reflected in the water
Every time you read my posts on this page you are hearing directly from a broken pastor. My humanity can’t help but reveal itself as I’m forced from within to be honest. My honesty is key to my own processing and healing. I would hate for anything I write to make you discredit my faith or realness in Christ. I’m simply sharing both my feelings and hopefully my faith as well.
Right now I’m in such a battle. My pain and discomfort demands my attention and disrupts my life in every way. Being a messenger of God to others is not something I take lightly. While being a pastor is a joy it is also a quite a burden. Preparing a powerful sermon alone is not something that just happens easily. You’ve got to be able sit still before the Lord. You’ve got to hear clearly what He is wanting to be said both to you and the people. You’ve got to put forth great effort in studying God’s word and preparing things the right way.
Presently, none of these things are easy for me. I struggle to stay focused for even one minute due to my condition. My prayers are often just whispers. My thoughts are dominated by pain, frustration, and sometimes fears. My stomach is constantly churning because my soul is so overwhelmed in the present. Even still I’m reaching out to God with everything I’ve got. And, I know deep down that is all I can do.
All I can pray is that those around me choose to love me with the same understanding and grace that I choose to love them. I often wonder when others will simply get tired of me being sick. I know I’m tired of being sick. My constant prayer is that I might allow God to accomplish His will despite my afflictions and great weakness.
“You see, we don’t go around preaching about ourselves. We preach that Jesus Christ is Lord, and we ourselves are your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, “Let there be light in the darkness,” has made this light shine in our hearts so we could know the glory of God that is seen in the face of Jesus Christ.
We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.
We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies.”
(2 Corinthians 4:5-10)(NLT)
The Best & Worst Of Times
Posted on November 30, 2017 Leave a Comment
Written: November 28th, 2017
Everyday has been an uncertain challenge for over 26 months. Yes, I still battle with as much uncertainty now with my back and nerve pain as I ever did prior to any surgery. This has been the most painful and meaningful journey of my life. I do my best not to let my pain define me while I’m certain God is in the process of refining me.
Over 19 months ago I endured my first major back surgery. I really thought it would turn everything around, but it only made each day that much harder. 30 days into my recovery I was still pushing a walker over 2 miles daily throughout my subdivision. It was at that time God made one thing crystal clear. He said, “You’re not just on a painful walk you are on a faith walk.” He even made clear that the first book I will write will be called “Faith Walking.” The only thing keeping me from writing the book is I’m pre-occupied with the actual journey.
For so long I’ve hoped this journey was close to the end. But, honestly I’m not sure there will be an end to this suffering this side of Heaven. What I do know is I’m being humbled daily. I’m learning how to keep the faith when all you feel like doing is falling apart. I can better understand the pains of others while still going through much pain myself. God is developing within me a level of perseverance that is beyond human. Even greater God is getting much glory as He displays His great strength in the midst of my greatest weakness.
I’m clearly experiencing the best and worst of times. I see God constantly at work, but I feel pain all the time. I feel God taking me deeper in my faith yet my feelings are all over the place. I literally hate my present life circumstances, but I’m so grateful for all God is faithfully doing through it all. There is no doubt when this book is ready to be published it will be a total God story. A story about a man who totally reached the end of himself and then God reached in and carried him forward.
“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.”
(1 Peter 4:12-13)
Take Your Mask Off
Posted on November 27, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’m used to meeting people in difficult places. In the middle of great crisis is where most ministry opportunity begins. One thing I’ve noticed over time is how so many people feel compelled to apologize for how they are feeling and where they are in the moment. I just feel compelled to tell them it’s alright to struggle, to doubt, to wonder, and to not have everything figured out. Really what I’m saying is it’s alright to be human my friend and take your mask off.
Most who really know me know I’ve been wandering through a painful, uncertain wilderness for some time. Honestly, I feel guilty ever telling anyone how I truly feel. Sometimes it’s because I would like them to think I’m not falling apart. Sometimes it’s because I really don’t want to think about it myself. Yet, many times it’s because I only end up feeling guilty for my struggle, my doubts, and my fears.
For the person secretly struggling please know you’re not alone. All of us have things and seasons we go through where life just knocks us to our knees. In these humbling moments just getting up each morning can be a chore. Just taking one step forward in the middle of the storm is an accomplishment. Don’t ever think you need to apologize for where life finds you. You can only be where you are at the moment.
Scripture makes it clear that confession is healing. It’s healing to be real and raw with those who really care about you. It’s healing to process what’s so heavy on your heart. It’s healing to acknowledge that without divine intervention you can’t get up or walk another step. It’s healing to not have to wear a mask pretending like everything is fine when everything is not fine. It’s healing to simply come to Jesus “as you are” so that he can give you rest.
Jesus said, “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matthew 11:28-29)
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” (James 5:16)
God Deserves A Thank You
Posted on November 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
As I write this I’m in some kind of shape. My body is exhausted from being sick, nauseous, running fever and coughing all week. Add on top of this a tooth that has been throbbing around the clock for two days straight. Then, throw into all of that back and nerve pain that continue to be a normal part of my life. My wife just looked at me earlier and said, “I don’t know what I’m going to do with you?” It was just minutes later God prompted within my heart the need to write Him a thank you letter.
Even as I write this I’m listening to a popular worship song that says what I mainly need to express. “You’re a good, good Father. It’s who You are. It’s who You are. It’s who You are. And I’m loved by you. It’s who I am, it’s who I am, it’s who I am.” You see, no matter what is happening or ever does happen God’s goodness will never change. God’s amazing love, grace, and faithfulness are constant even in the midst of ever changing circumstances. God certainly deserves a thank you.
God, I thank you that because of Jesus I won’t get what my sins truly deserve. I am forgiven. I am changed from the inside/out. I am destined for Heaven because Jesus paid all my sin debt on that cross. God, I thank you for the strength you give when my strength is gone. God, I thank you for all the things you do for me, through me, around me, and despite me. God, I thank you for family and friends who walk beside me in life. God, I thank you for the breath of life and a purpose for waking up each day. God, I thank you for the trials you’ve brought into my life that are developing my faith, strengthening my resolve, and accomplishing your greater will. God, I thank you for a place to call home. God, I thank you for food on the table and for taking care of all those who gather around that table.
God, I could go on and on with this letter of thanksgiving. Please forgive me when I fail to give you the thanks you so deserve. Please forgive me when I stay so focused on my few hardships that I fail to see your many blessings. I praise you God for all You have done, are doing, and will do. You are a good, good Father that takes such great care of us day by day. I thank you God from who all blessings flow!
“I will praise you, LORD, with all my heart; I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done.” (Psalm 9:1)
“Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:18)
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” James 1:17
God Is Not Done Yet
Posted on November 14, 2017 Leave a Comment
Everyday is such a physical struggle for me. Even when I look like I’m fine I feel I’m just one step away from not getting back up. My legs feel so heavy, my lower back aches continually, and my limitations are many. But, I can feel God at work every step of the way.
Yes, my flesh is still kicking and screaming over this struggle. Yes, my mind has a very hard time comprehending how this could impact the rest of my life. Yes, I feel often that I’m not capable of doing all the things I would like. But, I can’t deny what God is doing.
God is tearing away my self-dependence. God is getting my full attention. God is increasing my prayer life. God is increasing my compassion for others who suffer. God is using my suffering to touch the hearts of others who suffer. God is growing my faith, endurance, and character.
You see, you don’t have to like something to see that it is good. I realize that in this short life only God’s will matters. I totally trust God’s plans no matter how my life feels impacted. Whatever God allows He allows for a reason. Whatever God does He does for the best. Wherever God leads it’s worth following Him every step of the way. I know in my heart that God has brought me this far and He will take me further. I will never walk alone or without hope. And, whatever happens God will work it all out for my good and His glory.
“And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” Philippians 1:6
Dear Confused
Posted on November 9, 2017 Leave a Comment
I would like take the time to introduce myself. I’m a born again believer in Jesus Christ. My life was forever changed the day I asked Jesus into my heart to be my savior and Lord. Now, I’m not perfect but by God’s grace, through faith in Jesus Christ alone I’m heaven bound. No longer do I have to wonder through life aimlessly wondering about my life’s purpose.
You see, most people think they have to create their life purpose. But, I discovered through God’s word that I simply need to discover my life purpose. God created us all with amazing plans in mind. He knit us together in our mother’s womb by grand design. He prepared in advance before we even took our first breath the great works He has for us.
Let me encourage you my friend. Don’t keep searching aimlessly for your life purpose. Everything you are looking for begins and ends in Christ alone. Future certainty is only found in Jesus. Present peace is only found in Jesus. The greatest reason to wake up each day is only found in Jesus.
Your new life begins the moment you put your faith in Jesus’s death, burial, and resurrection. He promises to forgive you of all your sins. He promises to give you eternal life in Heaven and fullness of life here on earth. Quit looking to a confused culture to help with your confusion.
Open up God’s word called the Bible. Let it shed light on the darkness and guide your every step. Choose to put your little hand in God’s big hand and He will take you places you could never otherwise dream or imagine. The devil will do all he can to keep you feeling confused, guilty, and hopeless. But, Jesus simply wants to give you life to it’s fullest.
“For God is not a God of confusion but of peace.” 1 Corinthians 14:33
Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the fullest.”
John 10:10
The Dam Finally Broke
Posted on November 7, 2017 Leave a Comment
Written: November 6, 2017
I realize many look at me and think he can’t be in that much pain. But, after almost 26 months of daily constant nerve pain it takes its toll. I’ve felt for so long that I’m just one step away from literally having a nervous breakdown. God just keeps carrying me.
Everyday I try to just take the next God led step. My condition and recovery guide my every thought. I can honestly say that I’ve given 100 percent effort from sun up to sun down daily towards trying to get better. I’ve also sought to let my faith guide me and not just my feelings.
But, today was so different. I could feel the pain rising within and flooding from head to toe. For whatever reason my heart was so overwhelmed and I just couldn’t hold it in any longer. Fortunately I had a previously scheduled counseling appointment today. Not even five minutes into conversation the damn just broke and the tears never stopped rolling. My counselor just said, “It’s ok you need to let it and sometimes cry it out.”
Later after I got home my pain got to me once again. I could barely get any words out as I just told my super supportive wife all I’ve been feeling. I said, I just hurt so bad physically it’s breath taking at times. I know so many are praying for me and depending on me. But, I’m just exhausted from trying and still feeling the same pain. This kind of pain just steals your joy when it comes to doing anything. I don’t want to give up hope, but I’m losing hope that anything about my health will change.
While not much was resolved the tears were healing. After all, God gave us tears for a purpose. I believe tears flush out things within us that just aren’t good left inside of us. So, I thank God for the cleansing and healing tears. I thank God for always providing just what I need and who I need at just the right times. And, just so you know “Big Boys Do Cry.” Well at least any that hope to be healthy and whole.
“Jesus wept.” John 11:35
Lord Help My Unbelief
Posted on November 7, 2017 Leave a Comment
Written: November 3, 2017
My stimulator has not been working great, my lower back hurts so much, and the pain is keeping me nauseous. I would be lying if I didn’t say I’ve been pretty miserable and discouraged lately. But, I’m not going to fall to pieces I’m just gonna fall to my knees.
In the meantime I’m putting together every plan I possibly can to stay healthy minded and hope to get healthy period. Therapy 3 days per week has not been going well. The hour drive one way and then back home has been terrible for my back. The 1 1/2 hours of therapy has just been painful and unproductive of late. Starting next week we will try only twice a week to see if that works.
Next week I will head back to see my professional counselor that I’ve not seen in weeks. I’m long overdue for that visit. Plus, I’m praying they can get my stimulator back on track as it’s quickly draining all my energy and progress.
What do you say? What can you do in times like these? All you can do is keep doing all you can to get healthy and never quit trusting God for the miracle breakthrough you desperately need. I’m not afraid just struggling. I’m not in denial it’s just not the time to give up the faith. In fact, there never comes a time that faith is not critical.
“Jesus said to him, “If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.” Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” (Mark 9:23-24)
Don’t Blink Parents
Posted on November 7, 2017 Leave a Comment
If you have kids you will especially understand what I’m about to say. One moment you’re celebrating their birth and the next you’re bracing yourself for their departure. You hear people tell you early on that they grow up so fast. Well, those people are absolutely correct.
I still recall the dramatic entrance of my firstborn son of four. We all anxiously awaited for that little girl to arrive. Two ultrasounds had revealed it would definitely be a princess. God showed us all who really knows things when we were surprised with a 9 pound 10 ounce boy. We were in shock for the first 24 hours and finally came up with the name Matthew which means “Gift From God.”
I’ve found that each child has been a total gift from God. Sure you have your battle of wills contest when they hit the teenage years. But, I wouldn’t trade any one of my four boys for any amount of money. But, what’s starting to become my reality is whether I like it or not they are growing up way too quick.
This past year I cried way harder than I expected when my oldest son graduated. Now, I’m already pondering the life altering fact that my next to the oldest will graduate next school year. How can this be when it was just yesterday we started our young family. We did start young marrying when we were just 22 and 20. Then our first son was born just two years later.
I recall so many vacations where everyone was nothing but smiles. We played on the beach, experienced snow for the first time, fished, swam, camped out and just enjoyed the constant adventures of growing up together. Now my oldest is in his first year of college and his brothers are not far behind. I guess that’s why I really cling to every moment. I especially cling to every moment with my youngest knowing time is flying.
Parents may we not let time just pass us by before we wake up. A house doesn’t make a home. The family inside that house makes a home. Don’t miss another minute or the next special moment. Seize the joys God has placed in front of you and know that children are a true gift from God. But, in the blink of an eye those gifts will grow up so treasure them each day.
“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
Psalm 127:3
You Just Don’t Understand
Posted on November 7, 2017 Leave a Comment
Written: November 1st, 2017
I’m just leaving my 2nd Of 3 physical therapy sessions this week. And here soon I will call an older gentleman I just met for the very first time. You see, while there may be nearly 25 years between us there is so much we have in common. Most of all we both know what it feels like to feel knocked down physically and emotionally everyday we wake up.
Even while struggling presently myself I just couldn’t ignore that painful look on his face. I’m all too familiar with what it’s like to keep wondering if you’ll ever feel great again. I could tell his confidence was fading and his discomfort was overwhelming. Enough so that I just had to get up off my therapy table and take down his name and number.
I can’t wait to provide him some long overdue encouragement. His therapist actually admitted to me that he had to pretty much beg him to even come to today’s visit. That was final confirmation that this guy desperately needs to hear from someone that truly understands his suffering.
God made it very clear to me that “Tag sir, you’re it. I’ve allowed your suffering for such times as this and I’ve equipped you to minister to this gentleman.” So, let me get on with my God given assignment. Oh and make sure you don’t miss yours my friend.
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.”
2 Corinthians 1:3-5
My Breaking Point
Posted on October 31, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’m passionate about being able to help others sort through life’s most difficult moments. I simply help them apply God’s never changing truth to their ever changing circumstances. But, I’ve learned that sometimes I must say “It’s me, It’s me oh Lord. Standing in the need of prayer.”
Now, please don’t inform others that the Pastor just admitted his humanity. I might also add that I’ve been on the verge of my breaking point for quite sometime. All it requires is for life to get a little more demanding and it blows my cover every time. I think to myself “Pastor aren’t you supposed to have it all together? Don’t you have enough faith to trust God beyond your present circumstance?”
To that I reply, “I absolutely have faith God will see me through. After all, He has never failed me before so why should I doubt him now?” But, that doesn’t mean you can ignore your feelings. I’ve learned that pure honesty to yourself and others is one of the first steps forward.
You see, you have to conclude that without Jesus you can’t make it. You have to realize that you must run to Jesus or else your well will run dry. And, don’t just run to Jesus for a momentary bailout, but in full surrender. Lay it all at His feet. Humble yourself at the foot of the cross and nail all that overwhelms you on that cross. For it’s when we reach our breaking point that once again we realize where true strength, rest, and peace are found. I pray we all reach for Jesus the only real power source!
Jesus says, “Come to me all who are weary and heavy burdened and I will give you rest.”
Matthew 11:28
Don’t Assume Things
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’ve said this often and I believe it wholeheartedly. You don’t really know anyone until you know their story. We have all been guilty of assuming things about others based on what we think we know from outside perception. You have to take the time to get to know someone before you can know much about anyone.
Maybe that person in front of you has lived a life of neglect and abuse. Maybe that person in front of you never had parents or a great place to call home. Maybe that person is bleeding inside because of a grief that has taken their breath away and they just need someone to care. Maybe that person in front of you simply doesn’t know Jesus the only peace maker.
Instead of jumping to conclusions about anyone make sure you know who you’re talking to and what you’re talking about.Otherwise, you’re very likely to assume things that aren’t true.
“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged. “And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.” Matthew 7:1-5 (NLT)
You Never Get Used To It
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
Maybe it’s been building? Maybe it can just be triggered in the blink of an eye? But, regardless of how it happens I never get used to it taking my breath, confidence, and joy away. I just had to pull out my heating pad and take a Valium. Once again nerve pain is surging through my body leaving me nauseous, hurting, and with a heart that keeps racing.
I’ve had such a great week considering my condition. I guess satan couldn’t wait to knock me down. You would think by now I would be used to this feeling. But, every time it puts a knot in my stomach and doubt in my mind.
Even with all my steps forward it feels like I’m back to ground zero. I know that is exactly what satan wants me to believe. He will do anything to get me to give up and quit trying. He noticed my momentum and pounced on me when I least expected it.
I’ve learned that all you can do in these moments is hold on. Don’t over think your circumstance. Don’t think this is just a physical battle, but for certain a spiritual war. You must choose to believe that Jesus is life and will get you through this valley.
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the fullest .”
John 10:10
Written: 10/20/17
Nights Are Most Painful
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
What is it about the night that makes your pain so much stronger? Why is it you’re so exhausted all day, but then can’t sleep so easily at night? Why do things seem so much more unbearable at night? I think I’ve got some answers to those questions.
One, its in the stillness of the night that you have plenty of time to think. For many years it’s been said, “an idle mind is a devil’s workshop.” The more you ponder things the more they become your reality. It’s often at night that the things that worry you most consume your every thought.
Secondly, it’s usually at night that you are forced to feel. Maybe work or other busyness serves as a temporary distraction from the pain. Maybe during the day you can put your pain on a shelf in some ways. Maybe it’s only at night that you can’t escape where you are, how you feel, and the pain that surfaces your present reality.
Thirdly it’s often at night that things have just really built up. Throughout the day we usually seek to put mind over matter. We simply do all we can to live a normal life. Maybe during the day we seek to bury our pain while every moment it just keeps building.
All I know is my pain always seems greater at night. It has a greater hold of my mind and body. Therefore, I have to remember that the night doesn’t last forever. That while my pain may feel greater at times God is still good all the time. Therefore, I just need to hold on knowing regardless of how I feel in the night hope comes in the morning.
“For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime! Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.”
Psalm 30:5
Written: 10/18/17
Day 762 Of Nerve Pain
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
PROGRESS for me these days is a very big word. As much as my morning and evening therapy is stirring up my nerves like crazy I can feel some mobility returning. My body has just been stuck for so long it needed help awakening. I really do feel this is doing more good than harm. I feel a fresh wind and fire in my recovery. I feel the hope of striving to even reach 25 percent improvement. I realize apart from a miracle I will battle with this to some degree the rest of my life. But, it doesn’t mean I should just sit around and give up on improving. I’ve got too much worth fighting for as I seek to live out the second half of my life. And, I pray that at the end of my life I can say the following words.
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”
2 Timothy 4:7
Written: 10/18/17
A Breakthrough Moment
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
I just finished up my second session of Physiotherapy. During this time I’ve had to move body parts that have been protected and stiff for sometime. Basically I was at ground zero with the motions needed to move forward in my lower back recovery. Honestly, every pain I felt was a good kind because I knew it was a huge step in the right direction.
At the end of my session they had me watch a 15 minute video about pain signals. It revealed how quickly pain travels to our brains and then convinces us we’re not doing so hot. This really transformed my thinking in my present recovery season.
Most of you know that I’ve been constantly honest about my ongoing pain. I often make post even when I’m agonizing through the eye of the storm . But, I believe it’s necessary to take a different approach now.
Instead of continuing to focus on my pain I’ve got to stay focused on the praiseworthy. After all who by worrying or dwelling on pain changes anything. Sure, I will readily admit when I’m just having a tough day. But, from here on out I’m not gonna let the pain dominate my thoughts and conversation. I’m going to feed a different message to my mind and heart. I’m going to get back to true faith walking and not just pain talking.
Maybe this helps someone else who has been gripped in pain for far too long. Never ignore your pain, but don’t let your pain consume your every thought. Because when it does it’s toxic and paralyzing. And God wants us all to walk in freedom and with full faith no matter what life throws our way.
“And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”
Philippians 4:8
Written: 10/17/17
He Will Carry You
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
For quite awhile I’ve felt like an outmatched boxer just one punch away from being knocked out cold. One moment I feel I can beat this battle the next my head is spinning. If I was sizing things up based on odds alone I would been thrown in the towel. However, I must admit I’ve been holding that towel in my hand for longer than I care to admit.
Who wouldn’t feel this way humanly speaking if after two years of nonstop recovery sweat you still feel as bad as before? In fact, you’re even more tired and medicated. You’re even more convinced than before this will take a miracle. It wasn’t until weeks ago that I ever uttered the words “God, I just don’t want to live if this remains my condition the rest of my life.”
Now, it’s usually at those moments I either contact my paid counselor or my mom who is always waiting on standby. Through into that mix that my wife should be certified by now as a registered nurse and home therapist. God knows if it weren’t for many people in my corner I would have long ago collapsed.
I’m really starting to believe in that “Footprints” poem. Maybe it’s not just some cute words intended to make us feel better. Maybe it’s just stating the obvious for us all that often we can’t even walk without God holding our hand. Maybe not only have we never walked alone, but most of the time the Lord was carrying us through the sadness, madness, suffering, and outmatched adversity. Thank you Jesus for carrying me!
“Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.”
Isaiah 46:4
Written: 10/16/17
When Your Heart Beats Fast
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
I woke up this morning in a thick cloud. I assumed that soon I would be able to shake the fog my medications had given me. But, even 4 cups of coffee and an energy drink couldn’t phase it. Honestly, I would have given anything to not have to preach in such condition. But, it was the hand I was dealt and I prayed continually that I would not get in God’s way.
By the second service I was doing everything I could to focus on my next words. I could have easily fallen asleep about 5 minutes into the 11am service. The only thing I knew to do was be honest about my struggle and just hope it encouraged someone else that was struggling.
One lady came up to me after service. She said, “I just have to tell you how much it means to me for you to be so honest about your struggle. When my dad was battling cancer I wish he would’ve been so honest about his battle. It really touched my heart.” It was at that moment I felt somewhat relieved. I felt like it was ok to have not been ok. All because someone didn’t make me feel worse, but made me believe that God was still using me even at my worst.
I’m sure someone left with a different impression. I’m sure today’s sermon was far from my best delivery. But, it was the best I had to offer at the time. After all, God only asks that I give my best and then trust Him with the rest.
Even now my heart rate continues to stay around 100. My blood pressure has been high as it appears my stimulator is still running too high. Turning it down a few notches has already left my lower back feeling like I’ve been kicked repeatedly. No, I still don’t understand it all. But, I’m convinced God can use it all if I will continue to put it in His hands.
I have my first appointment at Results Physiotherapy at 7am in the morning. And hopefully soon things will have settled down in my heart and life.
“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:6-7
Written: October 15th, 2017
Why Is This Happening?
Posted on October 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
I think to myself often “if only I didn’t have this thorn in my flesh.” My Life would be so much easier. After all I hate living with what presently is such a handicap. It literally affects every moment of my life. And just when I think the worst may be behind me my nerve pain suddenly intensives with no warning.
Now, I certainly know I’m blessed beyond measure. I count God’s blessings out loud quite often. Just this morning I was praising God in my car. I’m not paralyzed, blind, deaf, lonely, depressed, hopeless, forsaken or unhappy. I simply deal with something daily that makes life much more difficult to enjoy and do the things I would like to do.
But, God has grown my perspective quite a bit over the past two years. Is life really about my plans or God’s plans? Is life more about my comfort or courageously carrying out God’s will? Is life about what I see or trusting what only God can see? I could go on and on with these questions.
For sometime now I’ve been exhausted with this season of suffering. However, I no longer question whether this is God’s will for my life. I know God is using it to keep me close and humble. I know God is using it to help me minister to others in a much deeper way. After all, how can we recognize brokenness in others if we never experience it ourselves? I truly believe God allows us to go through things so we can be used to help others get through things. We may not always like how God is working, but we can’t deny that it’s through suffering God does His greatest work in us and through us.
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.”
2 Corinthians 1:3-5
Written: October 14th, 2017
When You’re Being Rocked
Posted on October 12, 2017 Leave a Comment
There are moments that all you can do is just hold on to the God of all understanding, peace and power. You feel the boat you’re in presently is rocking so much you’re just not sure how much longer you can “fake it.” Yes, I said “fake it” because many are just trying to pretend they have it all together. The reality is none of us have anything under our control. And when life rocks you to your very core that is clearly revealed. What we do know is who is in control. We serve a God who does not sleep. We serve a God who never questions anything because He holds all the answers. We serve a God who will hold us together even when we can’t hold it together. May we free fall into His loving arms knowing He will catch us and carry us every time!
“For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” Isaiah 41:13
In The Valley
Posted on October 12, 2017 Leave a Comment
You would think I’d be used to this by now. But, you never get used to something that keeps you miserable all the time. Every night especially feels much like a nightmare until my medication finally drifts me off to sleep.
Right now my entire body feels like it’s vibrating. It’s as if my nerves are ringing a bell within to let me know they are still not doing very well. The aches and pains are so great they demand my full attention. And, once again I’m reminded that God needs my full attention.
I desperately want to move on, but you can’t dodge pain in this life. All you can do is ask God to help you through it. As my first physical therapist once told me “sometimes you’ve just got to walk through the pain.” He was so right! So, here I go continuing to walk through the pain over 2 years later.
Am I exhausted? Yes! Am I miserable often? Yes! Am I sure God will continue to carry me through these tough and uncertain times? Absolutely Yes!
“Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.”
Psalm 23:4
Please Forgive Me God & Mr. President
Posted on October 12, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’ve got something to admit that God has convicted me about. I have never “liked” Donald Trump before or now. However, God has made clear to my heart that acting just out of my feelings is rarely best.
You don’t have to like someone to treat them how you would want to be treated. You can’t justify your bad attitude by the fact they have a bad attitude. And, while you can’t take responsibility for everything they do, you are responsible for what you should do.
All this to say that God has convicted me that my attitude must change towards the president. And most particularly my response to him being president. No I don’t have to change my approach but it is certainly best for everyone that I do. I’m afraid that most of us are guilty of buying into society’s constant protest mode. And just in case you’re wondering protesting alone rarely changes anything. Love and respect change much more.
Will I ever deny the truth, NO. Will I ever agree with behavior that is not acceptable, NO. But, will I begin from this moment forward actually praying more than complaining, YES. Will I seek to fully respect the position Donald Trump has been placed in, absolutely yes.
If I call myself a believer in Jesus Christ? If I believe the Bible to be God’s Holy, infallible word? Then, I must live to please and follow my true commander and chief Jesus Christ. He says that I need to do the following in reference to my president and all those in positions of authority.
“I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people— for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior, who wants all people to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth. For there is one God and one mediator between God and mankind, the man Christ Jesus, who gave himself as a ransom for all people. This has now been witnessed to at the proper time.
1 Timothy 2:1-6
Now many will read this and think it’s just one more person with an agenda. No my friend the only agenda I care about is God’s. And this is clearly the way He wants us all to approach this matter. So, please put down your weapons, agendas, and soap box. And get down on your knees for that is where change begins both in us and around us!
I Needed Real Life Support
Posted on October 12, 2017 Leave a Comment
Lately it’s been hard just to breathe. Trying to process anything other than my next breath has been a huge challenge. Lord knows I’ve tried so hard to be strong. Lord knows I’ve tried so hard to get well. Lord knows I’ve prayed and prayed things would turn around. Then, to my complete surprise things have actually gotten worst at times.
I’ve been to so many doctor visits, tests, and procedures I can’t even keep count. I’ve been to more physical therapy visits the past two years than most will ever go to in their lifetime. I’ve endured several painful shots with zero results. I’ve had two surgeries and have a spinal cord stimulator implanted. Trust me, I know what they mean when they say “sometimes you’ve got to crawl before you walk.” I’ve been proactive with my entire daily regiment since day one striving for recovery. I’ve studied hundreds of other people’s journey that are dealing with major back and nerve pain. I’ve got enough hours in dealing with pain I should have my master’s degrees, but instead I barely feel I’ve reached first grade in what I need to know.
I finally had to just admit that my approach is not working. Not that I regret any of my prior efforts, but they have just not produced the results I hoped. Everyday I’ve become more and more aware that doctors can’t do everything. That sometimes life just stinks and leaves you in the corner crying your eyes out. I’ve had enough struggling nights to fill a river with tears. Thank God I do have a strong faith and a very good support system. Otherwise, I’m certain I would have long ago been admitted into the crazy house.
For countless reasons I’ve had to re-evaluate my life support. I’ve concluded that I can no longer rely on others or myself for healing. If those two things could have delivered it would have already happened. So, I’m turning it ALL over to the only One that won’t disappoint. I’m plugging in my heart to the only One in full control. You see, I need a life support system that won’t continue to let me down. I need one that won’t change like the weather at the drop of hat. Therefore, from this point forward I’m counting fully on a God who never changes. I’m relying fully on a God who never wonders how things will work out, but who will carry me through until things do workout.
“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” James 4:17
“Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.” Ephesians 3:20
Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may have life, and have it in all its fullness.” John 10:10
He Breaks My Fall
Posted on October 4, 2017 Leave a Comment
Right now as I write this he is on the top bunk and I’m on the bottom. I’m just lying here as it settles him to fall asleep quicker. But, little does he know that it’s his presence and his prayers that settle me. But, how can you fully explain that to a 7 year old.
If he only knew how many times his daddy has been near a total nervous breakdown. If he only knew how miserable his daddy is from sun up to sun down. If he only knew his daddy was just one step away from giving up.
But, then he steps in and gives me one more hug. Then he tells me he just can’t wait until our next daddy day. Then, as we near the end of another long day he says, “daddy we’ve got to pray before we go to bed.”
He always prefers that I go first so I do. Then, he bows his head and the miracles come to life. He says, “Dear God, please help my daddy’s back to feel better so we can have more fun together and have lots of daddy days.” In that very moment I feel hope in the air. In that moment the spirit of God within me is once again resurrected.
And while my faith is fading I can tell that his faith is strong. He knows God will take care of us all. And that should we fall God will be right there to pick us up. Thank you God for a little boy that much like your only son breaks my fall every time I feel I’m about to break.
“Though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the LORD upholds him with his hand.”
(Psalm 37:24)
A Nervous Wreck
Posted on October 4, 2017 Leave a Comment
The nerve damage within my body is so sensitive to everything. It’s triggered by every move, every thought, and even loud machinery. Awhile back my dad was grinding a stump nearby and it felt like he was literally grinding me. Within just a few minutes it took my pain from a level 4 to a level 8 out of 10.
I’ve said many times it’s as if someone has gone into my body, unplugged all my nerves, and plugged them all into the wrong outlets. The discomfort is so deep within the very fibers of my body. Understanding the surge throughout my body is a never ending mystery. It impacts my every thought and move.
I try my best to ignore it, but it’s just not possible most of the time. I told my counselor before that it’s like a form of paralysis. It simply hinders my life in so many ways. Most moments are just not enjoyable. However, I’m always grateful for what I can do.
Daily I’m learning how to live with this handicap. I’ve come to understand that many handicaps can’t be seen with the human eyes. Honestly you never really know what anyone is going through until you take the time to understand. Even still God is good. Even still God is faithful. Even still God is in control.
” I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:11-13)
It Hit Me Like A Hurricane
Posted on September 23, 2017 2 Comments
September 17th, 2017 marked the two year anniversary of the most life altering event of my life. I had just finished visiting with several hospice patients inside a nursing home facility. I was walking towards the cafeteria for lunch. Next thing I know I’m three feet in the air right before pounding the cement floor with my lower back.
Next, I’m face to face with a lady from housekeeping I had never met before. She says after reading my badge, “Chaplain, I think you just broke your back.” I quickly responded by saying, “No mam, I just broke my pride and made you a good YouTube video. She said, “Well, do you mind staying right here for a moment while I get something to clean this mess up.” It was only then I realized I had just walked through a huge, lengthy spill on the floor that had no warning signs anywhere near it. While she was gone I heard a voice coming from behind me. This man says from his wheelchair, “Reverend you know a fall like that could have killed one of us.” Having seen that actually happen before I knew what he was saying was very true.
Now, at the moment I just felt very sore and I prayed that doctors would discover that I did just brake my pride. However, within a short period of time I had nerve pain raging through my body. And, I remember telling my wife “I know you don’t want to hear this, but something is really different back there. Something I’ve never felt in my life.” MRI results would go on to reveal that I had a very significant tear and damage to my L5 S1 disc. Time would also go on to prove that my nerve pain would turn my life upside down.
Probably one of the most telling moments was just a few weeks after this incident. With my nerve pain running throughout my body I traveled desperately to an after hour medical facility. The lady said, “What should we tell them you’re here for this evening?” I said, “Tell them I’m going crazy!” The look on her face was priceless, but at that time I was not joking in any fashion. For the first time in my life I was dealing with pain that sent me somewhere physically, mentally, and emotionally I had never been before.
Speed forward to two years later to where I am today. Almost seventeen months ago I had major surgery to replace the L5 S1 disc in my back that two doctors told me just could not be repaired, but only replaced. Then, almost three months ago, I had surgery to implant a spinal cord stimulator into my back. This is a device that was made to deal primarily with nerve pain in the lower or upper body. However, it can take a while to find a setting that helps you best over time. Well, I’ve had numerous adjustments to my implanted device and I’m still waiting to see what can change over time.
I’m not going to lie. This past week alone was one of the darkest weeks of my life. Why? Because on two different days I dealt with a level of pain I never dreamed possible again for countless hours. Why? Because even after both surgeries my nerve pain is still raging. I presently take four times the amount of nerve pain medication I was ever taking prior to any surgeries. I can’t tell you how many tears I’ve cried and how many desperate prays I’ve prayed over this time of my life. I’ve not been able to work full time in nearly twenty months. Which for a man who was used to helping people day and night it’s quite the humbling experience.
Now, as I write this my mind is clear and my heart is right. I can clearly see how God is using this never ending storm. One, I’m closer to the heart of God than I’ve ever been. Two, I’m more compassionate and understanding than ever towards others who battle life altering chronic pain. Finally, I can see how God is using my pain not only to grow me, but to glorify Himself. Not only to speak to me, but to speak to so many others through my pain. Now, I don’t have many physically comforting moments awake. But, I am comforted in knowing that God is still God. That God still knows what He is doing and has amazing plans for my seemingly endless pain and suffering.
“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” (Romans 8:28)(NLT)
Parents We Must Teach Truth
Posted on September 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’m reaching that point with my boys where it’s impossible to avoid uncomfortable conversations. I know they live in a world that doesn’t clearly distinguish right from wrong. The least I can do and should do as a parent is guide them with unchangeable truth. And, I plan to do just that as long as there is breath within me.
What they do with that truth is between them and God. Parents the worse thing we can do is be silent when we know truth must be spoken. It’s not called being mean or overbearing. It’s called being a parent and loving them enough to play your part in their life. Trying to just be the cool parent will only lead to greater heartache.
There are too many examples of parentless kids in society. So, I’ve decided I’m not just going to be a chaperone, but I’m gonna step up and be a parent. I know one day they will be grateful that I cared enough to step up, speak up, and do my best to prepare and protect them while I could. Yes, parenting is never ending, but totally worth every ounce of our effort!
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” Deuteronomy 6:5-7
Searching For God’s Will
Posted on September 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
Many times in life you’ve simply got to fight to hear God’s voice above the noise both outside and inside. But, what you don’t need to do is let your gut be your God. Just because you think it doesn’t make it true. Just because you can do it doesn’t mean you should do it. And just because you think it’s a great idea doesn’t mean it’s anywhere close to God’s best idea. Don’t be afraid to wait on God as He always reveals Himself in perfect timing to those who seek Him with all their heart.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:11-13
God You Must Think I’m Strong
Posted on September 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’m sure you’ve heard the old saying “God won’t put more on you than you can handle.” Well, I beg to differ with that statement. God has put way more on me than I can handle for quite awhile. And just when I feel like I can handle things I realize I just can’t.
The past 2 years have been the toughest years of my life. Prior to my severe nerve pain I already felt called to do things far beyond what I could ever do alone. Now, you might as well have knocked my legs out from under me, tied both hands behind me and then covered both eyes. I’m well aware that I can’t physically or emotionally handle more than 25 percent of what I could before. Yet, the call on my life feels even bigger than ever.
Now, I’ve tried giving myself daily pep talks. I’ve tried to beat my body into submission through strict training. I’ve even tried to just ignore my limitations and walk forward by faith. But, the painful reality that I’m just not able to overcome things in my present condition just keeps slapping me in the face. Honestly, the only option I have on the table to cope is to absolutely free fall into the arms of Jesus.
You see, if I’m to accomplish anything great it’s going to be only by the grace of God. Apart from the grace of God I must fully rely on the strength of God. I guess anything God-sized is not about what I can do after all. It seems it’s about God being glorified even in the midst of our greatest weakness. So, for my sanity and His will to be done I’ve had to digest the truth that “I can’t do much, but Christ through me can do anything.” I’ve just got to keep trusting that if God has called me to it He will take me through it.
“Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
Approach God Like You’re 7
Posted on September 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
It’s so refreshing having a seven old in your home. He reminds me what it’s like to have a childlike faith. Whatever he prays he expects God to answer. Everyday he thanks God for what he calls the “best day ever.” He still thanks God for watching over his “Boo Boo” our family dog that died tragically almost 4 years ago.
He says “daddy we have to pray because the world needs us to pray.” So he closes his eyes, folds his little hands, and simply trust in a God he cannot see, but evidently knows very deeply. Every time he prays I smile, but sometimes I cry. Because when I grow up I want to be just like him. Free falling in the arms of Jesus never doubting he will catch me every time!
At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore , whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.” Matthew 18:1-5
When Relationships Go Wrong
Posted on September 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
I don’t think there is anything harder to heal from than relational hurt. Especially when someone you really love has left you with a feeling of betrayal. You’re left lying awake for countless hours wondering what you could have done differently. Not to mention the fact you feel like you are slowly bleeding inside.So, what should you do? Or better yet what can you do? Here are a few things you might consider.
#1 Choose to forgive them!
It may not feel deserved or be deserved. But, without forgiveness there is no chance of healing. Whether you get the chance to do it in person, by phone, by letter or just in your heart. Choose to forgive if you want any chance at moving forward in peace.
#2 Forgive Yourself.
Hindsight is always 20/20 and none of us are perfect. Don’t keep dwelling on what you could’ve and would’ve done differently. Ask God to forgive you and He will do so instantly. Then, choose to embrace God’s forgiveness and forgive yourself.
#3 Keep Processing Your Hurt.
Hurt at certain levels just can’t be ignored. Therefore, if you don’t deal with your emotions properly they will continue to deal with you. Seek counseling if needed. Find a healthy support group. Choose to fellowship with other believers in a God who is always bigger than anything we will ever face. Don’t just take to social media and say many things you will live to regret. But, do find safe, non judgmental venues to confess and process your hurt, anger, bitterness and feelings of grief.
#4 Let God Be God.
The normal human reaction is to make them hurt like you’ve been hurt. Trust me, trying to get even by getting ugly just makes matters worst. Trust God to deal justly with each person’s sinful behavior. Put them and all your feelings in God’s hands. Time has a way of surfacing the truth. God has a way of dealing with and working all things out. So, let God be God no matter how you might feel or want to retaliate.
Sometimes You Gotta Decrease
Posted on September 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
I just got off the phone with my spinal cord stimulator rep. I informed her that I had my unit turned up way higher than ever over the past few days. And, that it’s as if my nerve pain is even worse and that the device is doing nothing. That my legs and lower back are worse than a week ago.
She said, “It sounds like you have been so over stimulated that it’s too saturated in there to do anything. What I need you to do is turn the entire device off for 2 hours. Then, turn it back on at a level 5 instead of 15. I have seen this situation with many others and it should help things to decrease the stimulation.
Honestly, I came close to crying over hearing those words. You see, I desperately needed to hear that things could improve and this was not all in my head. I have never given up hope so far, but after a few days with this level of nerve pain it takes you down quickly. While I’m used to some level of pain we all have our limits and we all need continuous hope.
So, I’ve turned off the unit for now. And I will dial back the settings to give myself greater hope. Sometimes things have to decrease in order for things to increase. Just like in order to become more of who God created us to be we have to become less of who we used to be so He can lead the way.
“He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:30
Confession Is Healing
Posted on September 8, 2017 Leave a Comment
I realize not everybody finds it easy to share what’s on their heart and mind. And, I’m not saying it’s best you always say what you’re thinking or feeling. But, I do know it’s very healthy to have somewhere you can just unload your heavy heart.
If you can’t be honest with your friends are those really friends? If you can’t be honest with family then who can you be honest with? You see, I believe it’s all in our head that we must keep things bottled up inside. When you do that all it leads to is an eventual explosion from unprocessed emotions that built up over time.
So, don’t be afraid to share with others what’s really going on in your life. It’s healthy for you and helps others realize that everyone struggles. I find that people are drawn to true transparency and authenticity. So pray about everything, but don’t be afraid to process anything that is weighing you down. True friends and family will still love you. And you my friend will feel so much better.
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:16
Sometimes You Can’t Change A Thing
Posted on September 7, 2017 Leave a Comment
Presently I’m sitting in the parking lot of my pain specialist office. All I can do is pray that they will be able to adjust my spinal cord stimulator to the point it gets back to covering more of my nerve pain. Presently, I can feel every nerve within me screaming things just aren’t ok inside.
I knew when I got this surgical implant 2 months ago it wouldn’t fix everything. But, I still live with the hope that it can cover some pain and enable me to live a much better quality of life. Deep inside I know my body will never return to its healthiest form. But, I also know I serve a God who has no bounds to what He can do.
In the meantime, apart from God performing a miracle my hands are tied. Meaning there is nothing else I can do presently to change a thing. This reality compels me to stay on my knees. This reality compels me to trust in a never changing God in the midst of my ever changing circumstance. This reality compels me to looks for ways God can use this instead of me wasting time fighting with what I can’t change.
No, I don’t like the cross I’ve been called to bear. However, I remember that Jesus totally died on a cross so that I can have faith, hope, and love. So, here I go again free falling into the arms of my savior Jesus Christ who won’t ever let me go or let me down.
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” Hebrews 12:1-3
Watch Your Mouth
Posted on August 14, 2017 Leave a Comment
Feeling Inadequate
Posted on August 14, 2017 Leave a Comment
So often the realization of God’s call on my life is overwhelming, intimidating, and nerve wrecking. How can I ever do this with such limited understanding, health issues, and knowing I’m so far from perfect? Then God clearly says, I will guide you, I will strengthen you, and I will accomplish MY work through you. Just keep surrendering and praying “Thy will, not my will be done.”
I’ve been a minister of the gospel for nearly 24 years. Not one day have I felt qualified, in control, or capable of accomplishing everything in front of me. I have realized that I’ve been called to a God sized mission. A mission that apart from divine intervention is doomed to fail.
Remember it’s not about you, but what you are willing to let God do through you. None of us have it all together or figured out. And we’ve not been called to figure it all out. We’ve been called to trust and obey God every step of the way to work things out. You will never get all together, but God has promised to hold you together forever.
“Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.” 2 Corinthians 3:5
In The Repair Shop
Posted on July 17, 2017 Leave a Comment
Why You Gotta Be So Mean?
Posted on July 17, 2017 Leave a Comment
Flat On Your Back
Posted on July 17, 2017 Leave a Comment
Take Time To Recover
Posted on July 17, 2017 Leave a Comment
Almost There
Posted on July 3, 2017 1 Comment
I’m just 5 days away from the implant surgery of my long awaited Spinal Cord Stimulator. The past year has by far been the most difficult season of my life. I’ve been trying to recover from major back surgery the past 14 months. I am very optimistic this implanted device will significantly reduce the nerve pain that presently surges throughout my lower body.
Of course, just like with my back surgery there are no guarantees. Anytime you implant something man made into a God made body there are no perfect scenarios. However, I did have the opportunity of trying out this device for a week. Based on that positive experience greater hope appears in front of me.
Now, I could never put into words how this journey has impacted my everyday life and family. First, I’ve not been able to return to full time work for over 17 months and counting. Secondly, I’ve not been able to “enjoy” doing much of anything physically. Thirdly, I’ve just felt like my entire life has been at a standstill since experiencing a slip and fall accident that occurred 21 months ago.
I would be quick to say that while I’ve had many times of heartache I’ve seen God at work every step of the way. I’ve seen that no matter where life finds you God is near. I’ve learned that even when you feel totally uncertain God is still very certain. I experienced the fact that God’s grace is sufficient and His strength is enough. I’ve concluded that it’s definitely during the greatest of trials that God not only teaches us the most, but plans to use us the most.
After all, what greater platform for God to showcase His ability than when it’s obvious you have little to no ability. I’m convinced that whatever hardship we experience God has plans to use it for our good and His glory. Yes, it’s often hard to enjoy a relentless storm in our lives. Yet, it’s also hard to deny all the ways God uses that storm to teach us and grow us.
Now, if you asked me how I presently feel my answer might not sound very positive. For I would quickly say that I’m exhausted, miserable, and would just like this all to be over. However, I would never deny the fact that God has used this time to build my endurance, faith, and character every step of the way. You see, I know deep within that God’s will is what matters most in the end. Therefore, I’m willing to embrace this uncomfortable, but fruitful time in my life. I would greatly appreciate your prayers as my implant surgery takes place this Thursday, July 7th. God bless you all.
“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” (James 1:2-4)
Still Waiting On God
Posted on June 26, 2017 Leave a Comment
Well, folks this is a big week in my life. I’m finally meeting with my surgeon to discuss and schedule the implant of my spinal cord stimulator. I feel like I’ve been waiting in the doctor’s office sick as a dog for nearly 2 years. Honestly, I can’t even remember what it feels like to get out of the bed with ease and walk through the day without great discomfort. But, hopefully better days are ahead based on the recent results I experienced from my trial of this device.
While waiting for what has seemed like forever God has revealed so much. As the former USC running back Marcus Lattimore once said, “Adversity introduces a man to himself.” Honestly, I’ve seen the good, bad, and the ugly of myself during this process. I’ve learned that before I really had not idea what it meant to be patient. I’ve learned that telling someone to trust God through the tough stuff is much easier said than done. I’ve learned that with God all things are possible, but walking by faith through the Hell is always a step by step process.
Now, I still don’t like the word wait. But, I’ve come to understand that waiting is often critical to the development of our faith. Waiting teaches us to fully rely on a never changing God instead of our ever changing circumstance. Waiting is not something that should be feared because during that time God is doing some of His greatest work. Our lives may feel like they are at a stand still. But, during this time God is working on us, in us, through us, despite us, and around us.
I’ve definitely concluded that waiting on God puts our lives back in order. You see, before we may have thought we were in control and called all the shots. Before we had the greater tendency to run ahead of God and think at times we didn’t need God. Waiting most often keeps us on our knees as we feel totally dependent upon what only God can provide. I know for me that waiting has taken a load off of my shoulders. I no longer snap my fingers and just expect God to do things instantly. I know deep in my heart that God makes all things beautiful in His time. And, God does work all things together for my good and His glory. I’m absolutely certain God will work the same way in your life as you learn to wait before Him.
“Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.” Psalm 27:14
“For we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Romans 8:28
More Than A Feeling
Posted on June 19, 2017 Leave a Comment
I don’t know about you, but my feelings change like the weather. One minute I’m high and the next I’m low. One minute I have great peace the next moment I feel that uncomfortable sensation called anxiety. Some want you to think that if you have such feelings you aren’t really a Christian. But, my bible reveals that this means you’re human. This is why I must be stabilized by my faith in Jesus Christ alone and not my fragile feelings.
It’s been said “you’ve got to stand for something or you fall for anything.” The devil is hoping that you don’t stand on the solid truth found in God’s word. Why? Because if you don’t stand firmly on God’s truth you will fall prey to anything the devil throws your way.
You see, momentary feelings will lead you constantly astray. They can wreck relationships, ruin your integrity, and cause you to question everything that comes your way. However, trusting in what God’s words says instead of just how you feel is critical to a stabilized life. Too often, what people refer to as God is simply their gut. And, last time I checked you shouldn’t trust your gut more than your God.
So, as you go through this roller coaster called life. Make sure that you maintain a firm faith in God and His word. If not your ever changing feelings will lead you away from a never changing God. Your faith must be more than feelings. Your faith must be what you rely on when your feelings are misleading you by the moment.
“Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong.” 1 Corinthians 16:13
“…You must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” James 1:6
I Just Had To Try
Posted on June 9, 2017 Leave a Comment
After months of research and great anticipation the big day finally arrived. I got to try for 7 days a temporary spinal cord stimulator in hopes of finding significant pain relief. Wires were put into my back and connected to a battery back. Then, everything was taped so much to my back that even the strongest tornado couldn’t shake it loose. I couldn’t bend, lift, twist, or reach for the next week. I was not allowed to bath or shower the entire time. My 7 year old didn’t quite understand these instructions. He said, “Daddy, I know you can’t take a bath, but at least you can go swimming.” I told him to go and ask his mom how the two of those things were quite similar.
Anyway, along with this unit came a device used to control the level of pulses sent throughout my lower boy. With just a few clicks I could feel sensations from my lower back all the way through both feet. After I got past my initial discomfort, I was able to discover the potential of this device. I received nearly 100 percent relief while I was lying down. It gave me as much as 75% relief while on my feet. It took a lot of trial and error to discover whether I would want this stimulator to be surgically implanted in days to come. Praise God, I discovered this unit could definitely help my situation.
Now, do understand this is not a cure for anything, but advanced technology that helps you to not feel extreme nerve pain. You still have to recognize your limitations, but man it’s nice to not have to cry yourself to sleep. You will still have tough days, but man its nice to get out the house a few hours without feeling like you’ve been hit by a car. This unit basically gives you back some quality of life. Instead of spending the rest of your life with a miserable level of pain.
There was only one thing I had to do to experience this relief and that was try it. After all, how else would I know if it could help me? I knew worst case scenario I would have wasted 7 days of my life trying. But, I knew that was nothing compared to spending the rest of my life having never tried to find some relief.
You know sometimes God puts opportunity in front of us. Maybe it’s a certain job, relationship, or window that could lead to brighter days. Or maybe it’s a spinal cord stimulator that could change the course of your life. Whatever the opportunity you can’t know the possibilities unless you give it a shot. Personally, I would rather die trying than to have never tried at all. Thanks to my seven days of trying I now know that better days await me. However, I would have never known if I had never tried.
“Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.” (Ephesians 5:16-17)
Why You Gotta Be So Rude?
Posted on June 5, 2017 Leave a Comment
Recently my oldest son Matthew graduated from Colleton County High School. There could not have been two prouder parents watching that day. We took every picture we could and enjoyed all that day had to offer. The only thing I didn’t like was what we encountered in our attempt to exit the school parking lot.
Do realize there were hundreds of people filling Cougar stadium that day. So it was expected that it would not be an easy task to get anywhere quickly. My graduate son and I rode together on our way to his graduation party not even a mile away. Well a mile might as well have been one hundred miles.
I’m not joking when I say it took over 30 minutes before we even moved out of our parking space. We watched as car after car passed by determined not to let anyone take the space in front of them. I had never seen anything like it. I’m talking about people that would look you dead in the face like they might kill you should you pull out in front of them.
I must admit that this preacher was doing all he could to let the spirit of God continue to lead him. At one point, I literally rolled down my window to speak out kindly to one lady the words “What are you teaching your children?” My graduated son was like “Daddy you’re going to get us killed.” To which I replied, “Sadly, you’re probably right son. But, I just can’t believe someone would conduct themselves in certain ways while their kids are watching their total unselfishness.”
Now, I can’t speak for those folks, but my momma raised me differently. I was raised to consider others’ needs more than my own. I was raised to open doors and look for ways to show kindness. Honestly, I find the opportunity to do such things is a joy, not a burden. It was obvious that many passing me by that day did not feel the same way. You could see it on their face and in their actions.
For those who have had this kind of stuff happen to them before I don’t feel the need to explain. I do want to challenge all reading this right now to not be that person. Don’t be so rude, but look for ways to show kindness. Don’t be all about yourself, but consider others above yourself. Don’t rob yourself of the blessing that comes when you love your neighbor as yourself.
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” (Colossians 3:12)(NIV)
Young Parents Please Read
Posted on May 26, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’m writing this shortly after watching a slide show my wife made for my oldest son’s graduation party. The first time I watched it I’m sure I cried a bucket full of tears. The second time just a gallon of tear drops fell. But, by the fifth time I cried zero tears as there was nothing left within me to fall. My present feelings have compelled me to speak to every young parent that will listen. Here are a few things you must know before it’s too late.
First of all, before you know it your child will be graduating high school. For an entire week I’ve just kept saying “It was just yesterday that boy was born.” I’m sure many parents could tell you that it really does feel like yesterday. I remember finding out that we were expecting our first born. I remember how proud I was when he was born. In fact, I spent hours just staring through that nursery window at the hospital. Trust me, it’s going to feel like your child grows up overnight. So, you better make the most of your time together.
Secondly, you will miss these days. God has blessed me with four healthy boys. But, I remember well when the three oldest were just ages 5, 3, & 1. I thought to myself back then, “If we can just get past this stage and these kids get older.” Man, was I totally wrong with my thinking. I would give anything for those days to return. Those were the best days of our lives. Listen, things may not feel easy at times in your life. But, trust me you’re going to miss those moments of easy hugs, kisses, cuddles, games, vacations, and laughter.
Finally, you must begin with the end in mind. By the grace of God my Matthew has grown into a wonderful young man. And, I give God and my wife much credit for her consistency over the years. But, I’m willing to admit that my firstborn taught me just as much as I taught him. I learned how important it is that I seize the moments in front of me. I now have weekly daddy days with my youngest son something I wish I had started years ago with him. I now know that once they are raised you have to release them. Remember that you are preparing your child to live without you, not just live with you. So, you have to do everything you possibly can to make sure they are prepared for whatever lies ahead in their life. They are worth your time and the extra effort you can give them.
So, young parents simply know this for sure. This time will go by in a blink. Treasure every moment you have with those children. Seize every moment you can to love them like Jesus, point them to Jesus, and encourage them to live for Jesus. Then, what God has invested through you will touch many more lives through them.
(Psalm 127:3) “Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
(Proverbs 22:6) “Train up a child [a]in the way he should go,Even when he is old he will not depart from it.
Dear Son, I’ll Try Not To Cry
Posted on May 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
Anyone who has ever watched a child grow up right before their very eyes will totally get what I’m writing. Anyone who has ever heard someone say years ago “before you know it that child will be all grown up”, you now understand. Anyone that is about to watch their son or daughter walk across that graduation stage you will totally relate to the words you’re about to read.
Dear Son, I’m trying so hard not to cry. But, I’ve got a feeling that soon the tears are going to just start rolling. As your high school graduation gets closer I’m finding that you’re constantly on my mind. Maybe it was seeing those graduation invitations be mailed. Maybe it was looking through all those pictures of you as a baby that I’m convinced were taken yesterday. Maybe it’s simply the fact that I totally realize you’re about to spread your wings and leave home.
Ok, I totally lied. Forget trying not to cry because the tears are now rolling. Trust me these aren’t tears of disappointment. Daddy could not be any prouder of the young man you’ve become. Your character, heart, and achievements make daddy look like a much greater father than I really am. Yes, I’ve tried my very best to be the man you needed in your life. But, some things in life can only be credited to our Heavenly Father who is always good, great, and faithful.
You were my first of four boys. When you came along your mother and I were still figuring out adulthood ourselves. Your mom was only 22 and I was only 24. We had only been married two years when God blessed us with you. It did take us a little while to name you since two ultrasounds led our doctor to believe you were a girl. Then, you were born and surprised the whole world.
I literally had to take pictures out into in the crazy waiting room crowd to prove that you were a whopping 9lb 10oz boy. Just so you know, your original name was Ansley Breanna Crosby. We already had a cute little dress with that name embroidered on it. Then, you threw us a curve ball. We had to return nearly 75 girl gifts we had received from baby showers. Thank God back then Walmart took back just about anything!
After being totally surprised that day we knew we needed to call you something other than “Baby Boy.” God led us to call you “Matthew” which means “Gift From God.” Boy have you lived up to that name everyday of your life. You’ve brought us so much joy since the day you were born as that unexpected boy. But, now you’re about to graduate from high school, head to the University of South Carolina, and whether I like it not, leave home. Yes, I knew we were raising you to know how to live without us, but I never imagined it would be this hard on my heart. Here are a few things I pray you never forget:
One, God has amazing plans for your life. You weren’t born by accident, but God has laid out purpose for the rest of your earthly life. I pray you settle for nothing less than God’s best for your life. Wherever God leads I will always fully support. Whatever you do I will always believe in the God who I know lives within you. I’m so excited to see all God is going to do both in and through you as you seek His good, pleasing and perfect will.
Two, God is always with you. You might recall a framed letter daddy gave you a few years ago. It says, “Daddy will always love you. Daddy will always be proud of you. But, Daddy can’t always promise to be there for you.” As much as I will always strive to be super dad I can’t match your Super Heavenly Father. Only He can promise and prove to always be there for you and to never leave you. Even when all of life has changed and you’re not sure what to do next. Never doubt, that God is always there, still has a plan, and will never leave your side.
Three, God has everything worked out in detail. From the college you will attend, the roommate you will have, to the degrees you will receive. From the person you are meant to marry, the career you are meant to pursue, to the place you will start your young family. I have discovered over the years that all I’ve got to do is keep putting my little hand in His big hand and let Him lead the way. Never doubt that God has it all figured out. You don’t have to create your plans. You need to keep getting down on your knees and seeking wholeheartedly His plans.
Well, I’m sure I’ll cry some more in days to come. I’m sure my heart won’t easily let go. But, you can bet that every tear that falls is only because I love you more than you can ever dream or imagine. And, one day I hope you get the joy of writing a letter to your son because he has brought you such joy. I love you Matthew Aaron Crosby. Love, Daddy.
Uncomfortable In My Own Skin
Posted on May 15, 2017 1 Comment
Mother’s Day started out as a pretty good day. I woke up very grateful for the mother I’ve been blessed to have all my life. In fact, I preached about how grateful I was before many others at church. Everything was great until nerve pain began to surge throughout my body. I’m talking about the kind that makes my entire inside feel like I’m on fire, but nothing will put out the flame.
It’s in these moments that I find I’m desperate to find someone who truly understands my pain. It’s in these moments that I feel the most misunderstood. I find that my words can’t make someone else understand what they’ve never experienced. I find that their lack of understanding only makes me feel more misunderstood. In fact, it just simply makes me feel totally uncomfortable in my own skin.
Now, I’ve come to the conclusion that there is no one to be upset with concerning this matter. I’ve also concluded that it’s during such critical moments that we each desperately need to be understood. We all long for someone to recognize our pain and encourage us through our pain. And, I believe this can only happen when the person in front of us can truly identify.
Ever since chronic nerve pain has interrupted my life I’ve found myself drawn to others who have similar pain. When I run into anyone who can really identify it settles my soul deeply. Why? Because we both speak similar language. We both know what it’s like to go day after day just wishing for that particular pain to go away. We both know what it’s like to pray every night that we aren’t up all night.
You see, we all need to feel that we can confess our struggles without being judged. We all need to bare our souls without being misunderstood. And, we all just need to get certain things off of our chest before we explode. I’ve concluded that this is done best when the person in front of you not only cares about your pain, but can identify with your pain. Whatever your pain the encouragement of others is critical. I encourage you to find your tribe and those people who can truly understand your struggle and encourage you through your present battle.
(2 Corinthians 1:3-4)(NLT) 3 All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. 4 He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.
Miracle On Chestnut Street
Posted on May 1, 2017 2 Comments
I received the following text message from a friend on Saturday night, April 22nd at approximately 11:26pm. “Sorry to bother you so late. Chris and Fannie’s baby John is being flown to MUSC. He has a fractured skull and is not responding. He walked behind a bat after it was swung and was hit in the head. Chris (his dad) is also in the emergency room as they thought he may have had a heart attack.”
Honestly, I felt like I could have a heart attack just hearing what just happened to my friend’s 2 year old little boy. I would soon find out that both the baby and the family were presently still at Colleton Medical as they awaited the arrival of the helicopter that would fly Little John to MUSC Children’s Hospital.
I arrived at Colleton Medical shortly before Little John and the family departed. The fear I saw in each parent’s eyes said it all. Both were literally scared to death as they just weren’t sure what the next moment might hold for their little boy. By the grace of God, John was still breathing and was now somewhat responsive. As I led the entire family in prayer that frantic night all I could do was beg God for a miracle if it were His will to save Little John.
Now, anyone taking a full bat swing to the back of their head would be lucky survive. But, when you’re only a toddler the odds of your survival decrease significantly. The next day after Little John’s accident I get the following text message concerning his condition at MUSC. It read, “His Skull fracture is on major vessels. They did more scans and all the doctors are reviewing them. Then, they will decide what to do next.”
Well, while the doctors continued pondering what they should do, God began revealing even more what He could do. They decided at that time that it was best they let some of the swelling go down before they did anything further. Messing with what they presently saw on those scans let them know they would need some divine intervention.
GOD IS AT WORK!
Recovering So You Can See What God Can Do!
Literally, just two days later after this breathtaking accident, Little John was holding his daddy’s hand and smiling. In fact, he and his little brother were eating Krispy Kreme donuts in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit together. Now what once appeared life threatening doctors said simply appeared as bruising in the back of his head.
Who Can Resist Krispy Kreme?
On April 24th, just 4 days after this accident John would have surgery on the back of his head. On April 26th, just 6 days after a blow to his head that should have easily taken his life, he was released to come home. On April 26th, just 8 days after that nightmare night Little John attended the afternoon wedding of his Aunt and Uncle.
Daddy Let’s Go Home!
When I saw this child myself in person I could not believe my eyes. There was no longer a cast or any protective covering on the back of his head. In fact, there was no sign of anything wrong with this 2 year old kid who just stared death in the face only 8 days before. All I could say is “How great is our God!” And, I can tell you that I saw firsthand a miracle that lives on Chestnut Street. I saw the face of God when I looked into the eyes of Little John that day. And, I told his parents, “that in over 23 years of ministry dealing with countless crisis I had never seen a miracle like what God did in the life of Little John. And, it’s something that will inspire my belief in miracles for the rest of my life.”
Little John on the right heading to a wedding!
(Matthew 19:26)(NIV) Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
Christopher “John” Hiers IV is the son of Christopher John Hiers Sr. & Fannie Hiers. Both of them and their family are so appreciative of all the prayers many in our community prayed on their behalf.
Thank God For The Pain
Posted on April 26, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’m more grateful for the things I used to overlook. Before I never thought it was a big deal to be able to work, play, and run whenever you choose. Oh, what I would I give to be out on a boat fishing with my almost 16 year old. Oh, what I would give to take my wife out on a date and not feel like the pain was disrupting conversation. Oh, what I would give to take my 7 year old on a piggy back ride. In fact, I bet he would love it if daddy could just jump on the trampoline with him.
I’m certainly more aware of other’s pains. I’ve always loved people, but now I know how pain disrupts every aspect of life. I know what its like to feel powerless to change your circumstance. I know what it’s like to feel like your pain will never end and that you’re always a burden. I can easily recognize pain deep in other people’s eyes. And, I always take the time to bring what comfort I can because I know they need someone to care and seek to understand.
I’m by far more prayerful. Let’s just be honest, it often takes crisis to bring us to our knees. But, when the pain is never ending it keeps you on your knees. I’ve never prayed harder or longer about something in my life. Most of all, I’ve learned to pray sincerely “His will, not my will be done.”
I know my faith is stronger. God has been building my faith step by step through this journey. I’m learning how to endure, be patient, and trust even when I can’t clearly see where this will lead. For many months now I’ve known this was a purposeful journey that God has allowed in my life. It’s not my job to figure it all out, but to trust that God will work all things out.
“These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold–though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.” (1 Peter 1:7)
Don’t Be Afraid To Wait
Posted on April 24, 2017 2 Comments
PATIENCE. I’m just not sure that any of us are born with this ability. Yet, it’s something we all must develop if we plan to accomplish anything great. Why? Because life is full of waiting seasons. However, waiting never seems to be easy for most of us.
Before we ever even breathe our first breath we find ourselves waiting. Typically for nearly nine months we remain in our mother’s womb as our parent’s anxiously await our earthly arrival. I’m sure most of us were kicking and screaming to be delivered earlier than expected. But, God knew what was best.
When you’re very young you can’t wait to grow up. You can’t wait stay up later. You can’t wait to get your driver’s license. You can’t wait to get out of school and control your own destiny. Most of us just had no idea that we were living the good life with no bills, no job, and no adult problems.
As we get older we discover that waiting is still a part of life. In fact, as we grow wiser we discover that waiting is a necessary part of life. For example, we learn that if we can’t afford something its best we wait until we can to purchase it. Before we jump into marriage we need to make sure that we’re ready to make that lifelong commitment. Before we just jump into any career we need take time to know we are pursuing something we enjoy.
Now, at this point in my life I thought most of my waiting would be over. But, here I sit constantly waiting for many things to happen in God’s perfect timing. While I’ve not reached any point where waiting was easy I have come to realize that waiting is absolutely necessary. You see, I would rather wait on God’s perfect plan than to run ahead with my own any day. I encourage you to not be afraid to wait. For I believe with all my heart that good things do come for those who wait on the Lord. Seek to do things His way and wait on His perfect timing.
(Isaiah 40:31) But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.
*Craig Crosby is the Senior Pastor @ Refuge Church of Walterboro, SC. Find out more information and listen to past sermons by going to http://www.RefugeChurch.org.
It’s Just Tough To Be Here
Posted on April 8, 2017 1 Comment
The days and nights are so long. I’m so far from feeling like myself. In fact, I’m simply somewhere in life I’ve never been before. I desperately wish things could just go back to normal. Yet, even after much prayer the pain is still real and the reality is constant. I can so relate to the many times others have said to me, “It’s just tough to be here.”
Maybe you’re somewhere in life you’ve never been before. You just wish you could go back to the good old days. When life was seemingly more predictable. When your aches and pains were far less. When your heart felt so much more settled. Yet, you realize just like me that going back in time is simply not an option.
I believe it’s so critical in these times that we realize our pain and suffering will not last forever. Yes, this life is full of ups, downs, wins, and losses. But, one day for every true believer in Jesus Christ this roller coaster ride will come to an end. And, therefore we can still look forward with great hope.
In this life, Jesus promises to give us peace even in the midst of the chaos. In the next life, God promises complete peace, no more pain and no more chaos. Yes, in Heaven everyday will be total paradise. Thankfully God’s word reveals promise for all who are in Christ both for now and later. So, in the midst of feeling hopeless we have to cling to this hope.
Revelation 21:4 says that one day in Heaven “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”
Just Get It Off Your Chest
Posted on April 3, 2017 Leave a Comment
As I write this I’m sitting in bed with a brace around my neck, ice on my shoulders, and a heating pad on my lower back. I would like to say this is an abnormal experience, but lately it’s become rather normal. For over 11 months since my major back surgery recovery has been a day and night, painful experience. But, I can promise you that I’m continuing to faith walk.
Now, I’m always aware that there are many that are tired of hearing about my struggles. They would rather me say I’m suddenly healed or just keep my mouth shut. After all, I am supposed to be a man of great faith. Well, let me make this very clear to anyone listening. We all struggle, we all fall short, and we all deal with things daily we just wish would go away.
If there is one thing I’ve discovered for sure during this seasonal journey it’s the fact that confession really is healing. First, there is nothing harder than living a lie. Secondly, just to get things off your chest makes things so much more bearable. Thirdly, allowing God to use your struggle gives you a clear view that your pain in not in vain.
Now, I don’t know what you have going on in your life at this time. But, I know these things for sure. Confession is healing. Confession of your struggle builds a bridge from your heart to the hearts of others who are struggling. And, confession is critical to God being able to use your weakness to reflect His greatness. It’s alright to cry. It’s alright to shout. And, it’s healing to let it all out.
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4)
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)
God Spoke Through Tiger Words
Posted on March 21, 2017 Leave a Comment
I just finished watching an interview of Tiger Wood’s on Sports Center. Tiger was asked, “Will you ever be able to return to playing championship level golf again?” I could totally relate to his every response!
Tiger said, “I can! Of course I’ve got to get a lot stronger, get back out there on the golf course, and feel like I can compete again. But, I’ve still got to get a lot better.”
He was told “You know there have been glimpses of us thinking you were becoming the old Tiger and then suddenly we hear issues about your back again. Is there some specific thing you can put your finger on that happened?”
Tiger responds, “Well, it’s the fact that I’ve had 3 back operations. My back will never be what it “used” to be. Unfortunately that’s the reality of it. I’m going to have good periods and I’m gonna have bad periods. For the rest of me life. I wish it was different. But, once you operate on it, it’s never gonna be the same.”
“Was it surprising when it acted up again?” Tiger says, “Well, yes it was surprising that it hurt that much. I’ve had moments where it’s hurt before. But, I’ve just got to accept that this is the way it’s gonna be with continued ups and downs.”
“I want be able to work like I used to. I want be able to train like I used to. But, I will have to alter and find other ways around it. And that’s just the reality of the situation.”
How much time have you thought about this life change? “A lot. Not being able to compete at a high level like I used to. And then not being able to participate in my kids lives. That has probably been the most difficult.”
“My kids are very active. They want to play different sports and they want daddy to play. And when I was struggling there laying on the ground, laying in the bed, not able to do those things. That really took a toll on me mentally. Because I wasn’t able to participate in my kids lives.”
“Have I looked at things differently going forward? Absolutely! But, my number one priority now is making sure I’m able to do the things with my kids like I would like. My priority to participate in golf at the same level is not the priority it used to be. That’s just the way it is.”
Wow! Do you see how four time Master’s Champion Tiger Wood’s perspective has changed through his pain and suffering. Before all he saw was golf, golf, golf. But, in his interview I could see a sincere heart change. And with heart change comes life change.
Maybe we need to let our pain redirect us towards things that matter most. I know just after one back surgery I can totally identify to the continued life struggle, but also much heart change. And, even in the pain I’m grateful for the renewed perspective!
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:2-4)
Dear Married Man
Posted on March 18, 2017 Leave a Comment
Almost everyday in the midst of many Christian songs, I intentionally listen to the song “Better Man” by the country group Little Big Town.
Why? Because I want to remind myself what I’ve seen over and over again in counsel situations. I’ve looked in the face of so many “used to be married” eyes where one’s spouse is just crying and praying that the love of their life would just seek to be a “Better Man.”
Listen, marriage can’t work unless you work at it. Men there comes a point you need to wake up, grow up, and step up. If you want to be respected then start living respectable. If you want that lady to stay by your side, then be her fearless and spiritual leader. Learn how to love her unconditionally and presently.
I’ve seen many married women that never gave up, but eventually did give out. If this message just saves one marriage it was worth every word. Trust me, I’ve run into way too many men that aren’t willing to listen until it’s too late.
Husbands love your wife as if it were the last day of your life. Don’t take them for granted and don’t ignore the signs that “YOU” need to change. And by the way, real change happens when you get over your pride, get down on your knees, and ask God to help you become the man you were created to be.
Oh, and know that your wife is not looking for you to fix her. She just needs to know she is loved and worth fighting for daily.”Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25)
Dear Sick & Healthy
Posted on March 10, 2017 Leave a Comment
One of the biggest things I’ve learned in this health battle journey is what many long term patients feel. Life changes for you. You have few moments you come up for air, but most of the time you feel under the weather (Just Not Yourself).
You never feel quite normal and you can never fully accept things have changed so much. Every good moment matters so much more than before. Things others take for granted you now see as a gift.
People’s encouragement and prayers are life giving. You remember every kind and inspirational word. You don’t ever want to feel like a burden, yet you’re totally aware of your desperate need for grace & support.
If this describes how you feel know that you’re not alone. And know that God will be with you every second of every day. His grace is sufficient and His strength is enough.
If you know someone going through a tough stretch of health hear me clearly. Don’t ever make them feel like a burden and don’t ever make them feel insignificant. Know that your kindness means a lot and prayers carry them far. And know it’s only by God’s grace you’re not in their shoes.
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” (Colossians 3:12)
A Fight Beyond The Flesh
Posted on March 10, 2017 Leave a Comment
Anytime you get closer to the goal line the defense rises to another level. I can feel the enemy’s attack even greater than before. There is no making sense of it except to call it spiritual warfare.
I know some of you think this is just preacher talk. But, trust me when Satan sees you making God-sized progress the greater tests will come. You suddenly experience things you never saw coming.
With no extra stress my heart has been racing. With no extra physical activity my body aches even more. And for no clear reason, I can feel a dark cloud seeking to hover over me.
To counter the lies I turn to God’s word. To bring peace to my soul I pray and give thanks to God. To not get caught up in my feelings I cling to my faith in Jesus day and night. To keep renewing my perspective I ponder all the times God has made the otherwise impossible, possible.
No, it’s not easy. But, I know my heart is pure before God. And I know God will watch over me and grant me favor.
“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.” (1 Peter 5:8)
“For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.” (Ephesians 6:12)
Dear Stuck
Posted on March 2, 2017 Leave a Comment
Sometimes you just find yourself in a tougher season where nothing feels easy and momentum just can’t be found. It doesn’t mean God is not at work, but you just feel stuck.
In these moments you must “Be still and know He is God.” In these moments you need not panic about anything, but you need to keep praying about everything so heavy on your heart and mind.
These times come to us all. They remind us that it’s not about our control, but knowing God is always in control. They grow our faith as we’re compelled to seek God more desperately than we usually do when things feel much easier.
So, if you feel stuck don’t underestimate what God is doing this very moment. Remember His faithfulness in days gone by. Be calmed by the assurance of His faithfulness in the present. I know that in God’s perfect timing your breakthrough will come if you keep the faith. So, stay the course, trust God with the process, and keep the faith!
“And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.” Philippians 1:6
*Join Pastor Craig Sundays 9:15 or 11am @ Refuge Church. They are located @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Dr, Walterboro. Come as you are, Never leave the same!
When You’re Going Through Hell
Posted on February 24, 2017 Leave a Comment
For those right now going through a battle way beyond your control. I know you are scared, hurting, and wondering when it will all come to an end. I’ve been in that kind of season for over 17 months now. Here are some things I’ve discovered will help you deal with things.
#1 Be honest with those who love you. Trying to look tough when you’re falling apart only increases the pain. Those who love you want to know how they can help and encourage you through this journey. Hiding pain from loved ones is never a good thing.
#2 Take One Day At A Time. I now know why this was one of my Granddad’s favorite songs. Sometimes life is way too overwhelming to look ahead or behind. Just focus on the next moment and seek to take the next right step.
#3. Pray, Pray, Pray. Some times it won’t matter how hard you try things won’t change by your efforts alone. Prayer is putting things into the hands of a God that can change anything. If you can walk, I strongly encourage you to prayer walk. It refreshes the soul and takes things off your chest that are way too big for you to handle.
#4 Open Your Bible. Every word in the Bible is God speaking to you. You must meditate on and digest God’s truth especially in the midst of your chaos. Your mind and heart can make you feel hopeless. But, God’s word will remind you that in Jesus Christ hope always remains.
#5 Find A Support System. I daily reach out to others who are battling with similar struggles. I often call or text someone that I know will pray for me in my most unbearable moments. I know that without the right support system you will fall apart. But, having others walking with you can make a great difference.
Whatever you do, don’t give up! God will take you through this valley and give you the strength and comfort so desperately needed at just the right time! I’m praying for you!
“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:6-7)
Looking for a church support system? Join Pastor Craig Sundays 9:15 or 11am @ Refuge Church of Walterboro. Come as you are, Never leave the same!
Let Go And Let God Work
Posted on February 6, 2017 Leave a Comment
I spend a lot of time daily with my heating pad, bible, and note pad. Sometimes late night and always early morning. I can thank my present trial for a lot of present gifts.
Now, I know I’m not the only one in pain. Every time I even head out my house I run into someone much worse than myself. I feel so drawn to come alongside others hurting and give them reason to hope.
Right now someone needs to hear these words. You are going to be alright. God is with you and God will never leave you.
Don’t let fear of the unknown shatter your faith. In fact, let it help you cling even tighter to your faith in Jesus Christ alone.
You see, before something life altering happens we think we’re in control. Then, unforeseen circumstance makes it clear we never were calling the shots.
God is not allowing this trial to destroy you. But, God plans for it to awaken you, develop you, and let you see where true hope comes from.
People and circumstances will change like the weather. Therefore, lasting peace can only be found in a never changing Heavenly Father.
So, in your time of seeming desperation don’t get bitter, but cry out to Jesus like never before. He will pick you up and carry you through the present valley.
In God’s hands there is no such thing as useless pain or hopeless situations. Every second of your struggle is divinely purposeful. So let go and let God work. You will discover God is faithful time and time again.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:2-4)
“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6)
What About The Caregiver?
Posted on January 20, 2017 Leave a Comment
What I’m about to write comes from a lot of firsthand observation. Not just outside my home, but inside my house. When someone is sick and struggling the patient normally gets the bulk of the attention. The concern and prayers are often focused on an audience of one. But, what about the caregiver?
My own personal health has been like a never ending roller coaster ride. One moment I think I’m getting better and the next minute my nerve pain has me thinking I need a psychiatrist. Months before my back surgery and now nearly 9 months afterwards my wife Aimee is still helping me day and night.
Aimee knows what it’s like to help me out of bed day after day. She knows what it’s like to have to tie a grown man’s shoes. She knows what it’s like to feel like a full time nurse and waitress. Thank God, she also knows how to just take me by the hand while tears are rolling and just pray. She even listens to the same painful complaints day after day. She not only has to watch me suffer constantly, but inside she is suffering. Not to mention having to still carry on with so many other daily responsibilities as if she were a single mother. After all, we do have four boys that need attention.
While serving as a hospice chaplain I’ve spotted this issue quite often. First, I would recognize and get to know the actual patient that was obviously battling some life threatening illness. However, I knew it was impossible to ignore the other person who loved them dearly and was always by their side. We call that person the primary caregiver. Meaning that person was the main one who looked after the care of their loved one all the time.
I’ve learned over time the significance of pulling aside the primary caregiver for a private conversation. I wanted to look into their hurting eyes and recognize their heavy heart. I would tell them something I knew they desperately needed to hear. “Hey, I just want you to know I realize there is more than just one struggling patient in this house.” Often, the tears would roll down their cheeks. As for just a few moments they got to express their struggle, their pain, their heartbreak, and get the much needed attention they deserved.
So, when you see someone going through something big and life changing. Don’t just check on the patient, but recognize the caregiver. Take time to pray for and encourage that person who is fighting daily to encourage the patient they dearly love. Because I know personally that without a great caregiver it’s hard to make a great recovery.
You see, even though I feel in the greatest physical fight of my life. I’m constantly realizing that without my wife being such a great caregiver I would never make it through. So, caregivers out there who don’t feel appreciated enough know that we realize your priceless importance. And that you not only hurt for the patient, but you are hurting yourself.
“So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
God Spoke Through A Legend
Posted on January 2, 2017 Leave a Comment
As I write this it’s just two days into the New Year. God has been getting me out of the bed a long time, but this season is so different. It’s taking everything I’ve got and so much more. But, Satan might want to watch out because God is carrying me forward.
Today marks 12 days of consistent day and night physical therapy. I’ve eliminated caffeine out of my life as I’ve learned to guzzle water daily. I know if I just stay in that bed and do nothing I will only become further depressed and Satan will have won.
No, the pain has never ended even 8 months after surgery, but my perseverance and faith sure keep growing. I sincerely thank God for every millisecond of this trial that only He knows the outcome.
You see, it’s not our job to paint the picture, but to let Him paint through us. Worrying changes nothing and pity parties only drown us in despair.
I just finished pressing through 10 sets of physical therapy exercises that might be easy for many others. But, for me it took Jesus Christ pumping through my veins and sometimes tears rolling.
At one time John Legend’s song, “Love Me Now” was blaring through my headphones as I begged God’s strength on that treadmill. You know what I heard?
I heard Jesus asking, “Are you gonna love me now? While the pain is still deep and the future feels so uncertain with your health. Will you love me now or will you just be like most professing Christians, just another fair weather fan!”
“These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold–though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.” (1 Peter 5:7)(NLT)
Join Pastor Craig throughout January as he shares X-Factors that could make 2017 your best year yet. Services @ Refuge Church are 9:15 & 11am. Wear what you have, Come as you are, Never leave the same! They are located @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Dr, Walterboro.
None Of Us Have It Figured Out
Posted on January 2, 2017 Leave a Comment
I’m So Tired Of Fighting
Posted on December 19, 2016 2 Comments
The hardest tests to deal with in life are the ones that last much longer than you would like. In fact, you wonder if they will ever end.
These tests change life as you once knew it. You are forced to make drastic adjustments and free fall in the arms of the Almighty.
For a season we all kick and scream over our lack of control. Humanly we feel certain tests are just stealing our quality of life. The future appears ruined!
Then, we finally learn to quit fighting with the process. Especially once we realize the battle is so beyond us.
If we take God’s word to heart we know it’s not a wasted season. God just has us in His workshop. Our faith is growing and our perseverance is being developed more than ever. We’re learning what it means to really trust God in everything.
At some point, we will see clearer the reason for the season. But until then we have to trust God has a purpose and plan for it all.
So, don’t let the valley steal your joy. Keep fighting the good fight, keep the faith, and expect God to use everything in ways you never dreamed.
“The Lord will fight for you. You need only to be still.” Exodus 14:14
I Met A Little Angel
Posted on December 10, 2016 1 Comment
Recently, my 6 year old son and I ran into a lady who could barely walk to her car. The burden on her body and soul were so obvious on her face. The holy spirit within me said, “Stop what you’re doing and check on this lady.” Come to find out she and her daughter were homeless. We could not ignore the need this lady had for somebody to care.
From there we made sure they had some basic necessities for their present camping site. Mainly they needed things to keep warm, food to keep fed, and God’s love to lift their spirits. With each step down the Walmart aisles she was so overwhelmed with gratitude. She constantly said with tears flowing, “Y’all are my angels.”
After things were loaded in her car my 6 year old son prayed over her. With every word he spoke I could see her spirit coming to life like Frosty The Snowman. We left knowing this was a divine appointment.
My son got back in the car and just cried. I asked, “Why are you crying?” He replied, “I just want them to have a house and be warm.” I assured him that we had done our best to help them be both warm and fed for a few days.
Then I asked, “Why do you think that lady called us her angels?” He said, “Because we just did what Jesus does for us and just loved them.” My heart was so full. I’ve not been able to forget the simple, profound words God spoke through my 6yr old. God has called us all to be angels.
Jesus said, “For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’
“Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’
*Craig Crosby is the senior pastor of Refuge Church. At Refuge you will always be loved as you are, but never left the same. Experience the difference Sundays 9:15 or 11am @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Drive, Walterboro, SC.
Keep Faith Walking!
Posted on December 5, 2016 Leave a Comment
It’s been exactly 7 months since my back surgery. I feel like I’m at the halfway point of a very big game. I’m exhausted, I’m sore, and I wish things were easier & faster. But, quit is not an option. So, I’ve got to keep taking the next right step forward. I can’t focus on my weaknesses or speculate about days ahead. It’s about doing what is best now for my recovery.
For sometime, God has been leading me away from just praying for my physical healing. Who am I to question what He is doing while I feel so very limited. Maybe it’s not about me and more about Him. Maybe it’s more about the journey than me just reaching my desired goal.
I will keep faith walking forward. I will keep trusting God with every step forward. I will continue to pray daily that my journey might encourage someone else’s journey. And if it does it’s worth every struggle.
There are many things I don’t know, but I know this to be true. Confession is healing, perspective is critical, and God has a purpose for every moment.
(1 Peter 4:12-13)Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice in as much as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
(Romans 8:28) And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Are You Ready For The Big Game?
Posted on November 21, 2016 Leave a Comment
Me & My Two Brothers A Few Yrs Ago
This week many will get ready for the big game. Those who might not have watched a second of football all season will suddenly scream for either the Gamecocks or the Tigers. In fact, if you grew up in the state of South Carolina you completely understand this rivalry game that has become known as the “Palmetto Bowl.” This rivalry game dates all the way back to 1896. It’s the longest uninterrupted series in the South and the second longest uninterrupted NCAA DI-A/FBS series in the country.
Fortunately, this year’s big game will be played two days after Thanksgiving. This way hopefully family members in South Carolina can enjoy some undivided time together before they go to war on the football field. Of course, I’m sure there will be some trash talk taking place while enjoying that homemade turkey and dressing.
As many as 86,000 screaming fans will watch the big game live inside Clemson’s Death Valley. Well over 2 million will watch the game broadcasted live through ESPN during its 7:30pm prime time slot this Saturday. Countless dollars will be spent, many hours given, and much energy will be put forth to watch young men run back and forth on a football field.
Now, anyone who really knows me knows that I can’t wait for kickoff. I don’t plan on missing one second of this big game. I have friends on both sides of this rivalry while I’m clearly pulling for my side. But, after years of living and watching football I’ve really learned to keep these games in perspective. In fact, I give myself a personal pep talk before any sporting event of this nature.
You see, this is just a game. The final score will not determine my future. The final score will not fix any of my present life problems or struggles. The final score really won’t offer me any hope whatsoever in this life or the life to come. So, I’ve got to make sure that I don’t put my hope in such fleeting man-made stuff such as football.
The only hope that is certain, secure, and won’t ever let me down is Jesus. Only in him can I find lasting peace, purpose, and eternal hope. And, whether my team wins or loses my hope in Jesus Christ will not change. So, before I say “Go Tigers” or “Go Gamecocks” I’m making sure that I’m putting my full hope in Jesus. Hope you all enjoy the game!
(Hebrews 6:9) We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.
(Hebrews 13:8) Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
(John 3:16) For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.
*Craig Crosby is Pastor of Refuge Church of Walterboro. Listen to his sermons online @ http://www.RefugeChurch.org. Visit him on Sundays 9:15 or 11am @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Dr.
After You Vote….
Posted on November 7, 2016 Leave a Comment
Saturday, I voted early for the next president of the United States. I approached this moment with a little anxiety, but after much prayer and processing. When it finally came time to vote I was actually way more nervous than I thought I would be. Suddenly, making such a big decision didn’t feel so easy. For the next few moments I just stared at the voting screen, but most of all begged God for divine intervention. I prayed, “Dear God, Help me make the most God honoring decision possible and trust you with the final results.”
After casting my vote, I was very encouraged by one lady working the voting booth. She said, “Hey Pastor Craig, I really enjoy reading your weekly articles in the paper. And you and I know that no matter what happens with this election God is still on His throne.” Sometimes you just need to hear certain words more than ever. Even if you’re a preacher you still need to let the truth sink deep into your heart.
As I left out to go home I felt relieved. Not because I had solved all the world’s problems or knew what the future would hold. But, I was greatly comforted by the fact that no matter what happens God will not be taken by surprise.
You see, God has been large and in charge since the beginning of time. The same God that spoke this world into existence. The same God that breathed life into each of us. The same God who has always been there for us since forming us in our mother’s womb. That same God has not changed and will not change. He will not change this week, next week, or forever.
There is no denying that this presidential election has been packed full of drama. Mixed emotions and constant media commotion has divided a nation. Each side has done its share of screaming at the other. Many have admitted that they just don’t know who to believe anymore. And, bigger than all of this is everyone’s concern for where is America headed with either candidate.
My friends, I have good news for us all. After you’ve made your prayerfully, processed vote. After the election results have been finalized. Trust that God is still God. Trust that God is still bigger than man’s greatest sins and mistakes. Trust that God has blessed America with eternal hope in Jesus Christ that can’t be taken away. Trust that even if everything changes around us, God’s goodness and faithfulness never will.
(Isaiah 41:10) “Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”
(Malachi 3:6) “For I the LORD do not change…”
(Proverbs 3:5-6) Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
WHERE AM I ?
Posted on October 24, 2016 Leave a Comment
Please allow me to say something before I start writing. This article requires me to take off my mask and may compel you to do the same. As I continue to go through one of the most challenging seasons in my life I’ve found myself often over analyzing where I really am right now. After much processing and prayer I’ve come to a very strong conclusion. I really have no clue.
I’m convinced that most of us spend way too much time trying to make sense of everything. Our minds become consumed with what if this and what if that had not happened. In our fight for control we try to humanize things only God can see in full view. We worry way too much about what we can’t control instead of focusing on that which God is in control.
I don’t know where I am, but I do know who I am trusting. I’ve decided that no matter what life throws my way I will put all my trust in the God who created me and carried me this far. I don’t have to understand anything to trust God with everything. While I don’t have a clue about this moment, I totally trust God with each moment. I place my confidence in a never changing God in the midst of my ever changing circumstances.
I don’t know where I am, but I know who is leading my life. Most people are living clueless, reckless, aimless, and anxious lives. Most are living in a way that Jesus described as “harassed, helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” No doubt, when you don’t’ know who is leading your life it swells ups great anxiety within you. Nothing brings greater peace than giving God the full reigns of your life. I can’t imagine how I would feel if I was actually trying to call the shots in my own life. Instead, I’m allowing the only One who is all knowing and all-powerful to lead me down the path He has prepared for me well in advance.
I don’t know where I am, but I know who is with me. I’ve felt a lot of emotions over the past year, but one thing I’ve not felt is alone. God’s reminds me over and over in His word that I will never walk alone. He says, “I will never leave, nor forsake you.” He says, “I am with you always even to the end of this age.” He said, “Even in the valley I am with you.” Yes, even when I take a wrong turn and don’t have a clue how to get back on track. God is there to hold me, comfort me, and carry me through the otherwise unbearable.
Finally, I don’t know where I am, but I know where I’m headed. God’s got my back, my hand, and holds my future. I’ve been preaching a series of messages @ Refuge Church recently called “Made For Eternity.” It has settled my soul to find so much confirmation in God’s word. I love the fact that regardless of where this life finds me I can be certain of where I’m headed when this life is over. (1 John 5:13) “I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God (Jesus) so that you may know that you have eternal life.”
There is no questioning that this life is a roller coaster ride you wish you could shut down. But, it’s ok to not know where you are at the moment. Just make sure you know who you can trust, who is with you, who is leading you, and you who holds all of eternity in His hands. God bless you on your journey!
Looking for answers in your life? Join Pastor Craig Crosby Sundays 9:15 or 11am @ Refuge Church. They are located @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Dr, Walterboro. Come as you are, Don’t expect to leave the same!
Lessons From A Hurricane
Posted on October 10, 2016 Leave a Comment
Death Toll Continues Rising In Haiti After Hurricane
God taught me this a long time ago. Things are always different when they are in your own backyard. Well South Carolina and beyond certainly got hit hard recently by Hurricane Matthew. Unfortunately, no matter how much you prepare there are always things such storms reveal.
One, we were never in charge from the beginning. We think we’re calling the shots until certain life event reveal otherwise. The hurricanes in life remind us that we are not in charge. There is a God, but we are not Him.
Two, we need to keep life in perspective. Things like football are a big deal to the average person in the south. However, when a big hurricane threatens your life suddenly the meaningless stuff doesn’t matter so much. You move from thinking about that big game to thinking about the value of life itself.
Three, we need to understand the difference between a need and a want. Over 800,000 residents in South Carolina lost power due to hurricane Matthew. It’s at that point we realize how dependent we’ve become to things like the internet, television, lights, running water and the perfect temperature. While uncomfortable for a little while we realize what we really can and cannot live without.
Four, we need to thank God constantly. Just being able to live in America is a blessing from God. God bless the people of Haiti who were hit by Hurricane Matthew with no warning. Hundreds of lives were taken in Haiti. Yet, so many here in South Carolina only suffered damage to their property. Storms remind us that we should be so thankful for the blue skies above, the roof over our heads, and the God who watches over us day and night.
Finally, we need to maintain a storm mentality. Many storms happen for a season, but every storm happens for a reason. God speaks the loudest to us when He has our full attention. In the storm, our faith takes center stage. In the storm, we become mindful of others in need. In the storm, we are forced to really consider every step in front of us. Honestly, we begin to live life as it was meant to be lived. As the old familiar gospel song says, “One day at a time sweet Jesus.”
(Psalm 107:28-31) “LORD, help!” they cried in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress.He calmed the storm to a whisper and stilled the waves.What a blessing was that stillness as he brought them safely into harbor! Let them praise the LORD for his great love and for the wonderful things he has done for them.
Ageless Truths
Posted on October 1, 2016 Leave a Comment
No matter what you’re age it’s always important you keep life in right perspective. Here are some timeless truths all grounded in God’s word that can help us all continue to live wisely.
#1 Live In The Now.
Too often we’re caught looking back in our past or waiting for what we think lies ahead. “Yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not promised, and today is a gift that’s why they call it the present.” There is no more important moment than the one that sits in front of you. So, make the most of where God has placed you right now. Love while you can. Do what you can. Put your total faith in Jesus while you can
#2 Learn To Be Content.
We live in a society that always must have more and more. We’ve just got to have a better cell phone, a newer car, a bigger house, and of course way more money. There is nothing wrong with any of these things. But, until you learn to be content no matter your circumstances you will never find joy despite your circumstances.
#3 Quit Comparing Yourself To Others.
I love social networking as much as anyone. What I absolutely hate is how it makes many feel that life is always a competition. We compare our appearances, accomplishments, relationships, and even our children. Every person is different and no two situations are the same. Be the best you that God created you to be and don’t spend your time constantly comparing yourself with others. Let Jesus Christ be your example and God be your God.
#4 Live Like You Are Dying.
Based on pretty solid statistics 100 percent of us will die one day. Death has no respecter of age or position. Try swallowing this worldwide statistic my friend. An average of 151, 600 people die each day. Over 55 million people die each year. No matter what you do in life make sure you are living with eternity in mind. Why? Because that is your next destination and your appointment will be here way sooner than you think.
#5 Stay On Your Knees.
Anytime we think we’re large and in charge we’re bound for disappointment. Life is full of humbling moments. You will never be able to face life’s constant ups and downs alone. You’re not smart enough or strong enough. You can get through anything with the help of your Heavenly Father. Get on your knees and stay on your knees before God. Seek His will above else, let Him guide your your every step, and trust Him to strengthen you.
(Ephesians 5:15-17) “So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.”
Don’t Give Up
Posted on September 5, 2016 1 Comment
Recently I reached the four month mark since major back surgery. I would like to say I’ve been miraculously healed, but I’m still struggling. Over time my recovery process has worn me down physically, emotionally, and mentally. Satan has tempted me often over the past month to just give up and accept things will never get better.
Fortunately, I learned that the only way to overcome fear is with faith. I know that God will never up on me and I have no reason to give up on Him. Satan loves to pounce on us when we’re feeling down, discouraged, and depressed. Satan loves to make us believe that our situation is totally hopeless.
You see, Satan knows that if he can get into your mind he can get access to your heart. You might not be where you would like to be, but trust me with God’s help things can change. That change starts by putting your little hand in His big hand. Then, letting God carry you where you can’t carry yourself.
For me, I simply had to return back to the basics of my faith. I needed to believe that God is not done with me. I needed to believe that with God’s help I can do anything. I needed to keep faith walking day by day. This is simply doing everything I can, while trusting God to do everything I can’t.
I don’t know what you’re going through right now. But, I encourage you to never give up. Never give up on a God who will never give up on you. You might be weak, but He is strong. You might be tired, but He can renew your strength. Here is a passage of scripture that you should take to heart.
“Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. 30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; 31 but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” (Isaiah 41:28-31)
Daddy, Can We Play?
Posted on August 5, 2016 Leave a Comment
I’m a Pastor to many and husband to one of the greatest women on the planet. But, I’m beyond blessed to have four boys that call me daddy. Very soon I will have a 17, 15, 13, and 6 year old. Of course the youngest is beyond spoiled by us all.
Recently I bought him a Super Hero matching game. My hope was this would provide us with some quality times together. After over a week of being purchased, we finally played this simple matching game. Most of all, we did something that he enjoyed and allowed us quality time together.
His memory actually proved to be better than his mom and dad’s. He won all three games and was beyond excited for winning. I’m sure he would have loved for us to have hosted a victory parade throughout the streets of Walterboro.
I love seeing any of my kids smiling and knowing that we love them. I’m convinced that nothing communicates that love more than quality time together. It’s something I don’t feel I’ve do enough in the past, but I’m trying to change that trend.
Maybe you’ve got young kids or grandkids that God has blessed you with. If you’re not setting aside intentional time to spend with them you’re all missing out. We all know kids grow up way too fast. And, while they are still young it means so much for us to go out of our way to make time with them.
I’ve said this many times in the past. If everybody says I’m great, but my kids don’t feel I love them I’ve failed. I believe that love is best spelled TIME. If I can’t make time for them then I shouldn’t be spending time with anyone else.
Maybe it’s time you leave work earlier, you quit making time for everybody else, and you make time for that young man or woman who would give anything for your attention. As they say, rarely has anyone got to the end of life and said I wished I would have worked longer hours and spent more time away from my family. I pray this gives us all something to think about.
(Psalm 127:3) Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.
WALK WITH ME
Posted on August 1, 2016 Leave a Comment
Recently, God blessed me with a few days away from my normal outside distractions & demands. My main goal was simply to allow God to refresh, refocus, and detox my soul. I went into this time physically tired, emotionally overwhelmed, and quite honestly feeling spiritually stuck. I knew in my heart, God was calling me to get away and meet with Him. That He had something BIG He needed to share with me.
Within just 24 hours into my spiritual getaway, God revealed to me the BIG news. As a man, husband, father, and minister I needed to hear this. God simply said, “WALK WITH ME.” I know I was looking for something a bit more profound myself. But, after further time processing this revelation I’m convinced this will have a profound impact on my life.
You see, God created each of us in His image. Scripture says, God hand crafted each of us in our mother’s womb. None of us were made to walk without Him in this life. Walking with God is simply putting your little hand in His big Hand. Walking with God is letting God lead you instead of you running, gunning, and doing things your way in this life.
Those who don’t choose to walk with God give up many things. Without walking with God you can’t reach your full potential. Without walking with God you can’t feel complete. And, without walking with God you can’t live empowered.
Too many overlook the impact of their relationship with God. Many make time for everything else, but neglect the most important relationship on the planet. GOD IS SAYING TO EACH OF US…..WALK WITH ME. And, I’ll take you where you can’t take yourself and to places you can’t dream possible.
(Micah 6:8)(NLT) “O people, the LORD has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.”
What Is Your Secret?
Posted on July 25, 2016 Leave a Comment
STAY CONNECTED (John 15:5)
The church I pastor has been growing rapidly over the past two months. In fact, all of June and July we’ve had way more in attendance than most churches will ever see on any Easter Sunday. I had a gentlemen recently ask, “What is your secret to success?”
From the look on his face I’m not sure I gave the answer he was expecting. I imagine he was waiting to hear me spit out some magic formula or profound insight never spoken. Honestly, I’ve never been someone who was sophisticated or eloquent with my words. But, here was my response.
I told him I’ve found that the key to doing God’s work is for it to come out of the overflow of your heart. You can’t take anyone where you aren’t headed. People need to see you living for Jesus, honest in all you do, and sincerely caring about what’s going on in their life.
I told him the biggest key to making a difference period is making sure you stay close to God’s heart. Reading His word, listening for His voice and obeying His every command. Scripture is clear without a close relationship with Jesus none of us can do anything. Disconnecting from Jesus is like unplugging an electrical appliance. You nor that appliance can do anything without staying connected to the right power source.
Every time we try to march to the beat of our own drum things fall apart. However, if we stay connected to Jesus he gives us strength, direction, and grants us success. Scripture is clear that apart from Jesus we can do nothing.
I’ve had this verse written in the front of my bible for years. But, it’s taken a lot of high mileage on many rough roads for me to fully know that it’s the key to any of us becoming all God created us to be.
Jesus said, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”(John 15:5)
Praise Him In The Storm
Posted on July 18, 2016 Leave a Comment
Another late night just hoping for sleep. I can’t believe I still ache this much almost a year after back surgery. I keep hoping that I’m going to wake up and this storm will be over. However, I can’t deny how God continues to use this purposeful season in my life to draw me closer to Him. I’ve had to learn to give thanks daily even when the rain keeps pouring.
Maybe what you’re going through is actually a blessing in disguise. Maybe what you’re struggling with today is making you stronger for tomorrow. Wherever you are, God has a plan. Simply let God work and thank Him for allowing you to continuing living.
I love the lyrics in Casting Crown’s popular christian song called “Praise You In The Storm”. The first verse and chorus are so powerful. I bet you can relate to these heartfelt words.
“I was sure by now. God You would have reached down. And wiped our tears away.
Stepped in and saved the day. But once again, I say “Amen” and it’s still raining. As the thunder rolls I barely hear Your whisper through the rain, “I’m with you.”And as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away.
(1 Thessalonians 5:18) “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
(Psalm 46:10) “Be still, and know that I am God.”
WHAT NEXT ?
Posted on July 8, 2016 Leave a Comment
I don’t think I’m far off to assume that the average American is just thinking, What Next? Where will the next riot take place? Who will be the next crazy gunman who makes CNN headlines? When will the next terrorist attack happen?
Yes, these same thoughts periodically go through my mind. I don’t dwell on them, but every time I flip on the news I’m forced to ponder these realities. After all, things that used to be periodic tragedies all of sudden seem to be daily. I honestly believe we should all be asking ourselves, What Next?
Now, here is one option we need to just take out of consideration. While we should do all we can to stay safe in this crazy world, I’m afraid we can’t fix the crazy around us. In fact, there is no sense in pondering on things we can’t control, predict, or stop from happening. So, let’s move on to what we can do something about.
If you’re a believer in God’s word, you can’t help but believe that we are living in the last days. Scripture made it very clear many years ago that these types of things would happen. For instance, many can identify with the following prophetic words.
“But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God—having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.”(2 Timothy 3:1-5)(NIV)
So, what next? I think the first step for all of us is to WAKE UP. We can’t deny that every day is unpredictable. Therefore, instead of living in denial we need to live prepared. This always starts with making things right with the God who created us, knows us inside out, and will have the final say. I recently shared the following words on social media.
“I don’t watch the news as much as most. But, how can any of us see the chaos around us and not fall on our knees? Why aren’t churches full of all races coming together to seek God’s divine intervention? Protest, criticism, racism or arguments change nothing. No matter how much things change around us Jesus will always be our only constant hope!”
Yes, times have changed. Yes, we live in uncertain days. But, God’s word never changes on how we must deal with such times. Especially as chaos abounds beyond what we can fix, understand, or deal with alone.
“If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” (2 Chronicles 7:14)(NIV)
Guns can’t protect us from everything. The next president can’t fix the biggest problems we face. Only by fully surrendering everything to an Almighty, All Knowing, All Powerful God can peace or healing be found. Because our greatest battles in this life are not physical, but spiritual.
If you have a church home I encourage you to faithfully gather with those believers. If you don’t have a church home I personally invite you to Refuge Church of Walterboro (203 Eddie Chasteen Dr) where I promise you will always find hope. I pray nothing but God’s best for all of you!
60 Days And Counting
Posted on July 3, 2016 Leave a Comment
I have to admit, I never thought I would still be recovering 60 days later after major surgery. I simply blame my perspective on ignorance and I guess thinking I would just be the exception to the rule. But, here I am on a journey like many before me.
I still recall day 20 thinking that I was halfway to recovery. Then, by day 4o reality began to set into my heart. Suddenly, I realized that I was in for a much longer ride than anticipated.
Don’t get me wrong. Not one day regretted this surgery. I just know there are no quick fixes and you have to keep walking out this faith journey. A journey that is full of life lessons, gut checks, faith tests, and God moments.
I have no doubt that I’m improving. Yet, here are the things that are making the difference from my perspective.
#1 I keep walking through pain. Every day I get up, dress up, and show up. I don’t just lay in the bed and hope I get better. I walk when I don’t feel like it, I eat & drink what’s best for me, and I stay determined.
#2 I keep listening to what professionals with experience have told me. If they say I can do something, I do it. If they say I can’t, I don’t. The last thing I want to do is anything that could set me back in my recovery.
#3 I maintain a daily, consistent routine. I set anywhere from 4 – 6 alarms per day to remind me of things I should do. I take my meds on time. I walk when my body needs movement. And, I make sure I sleep when my body is totally exhausted.
#4. I keep reducing my meds on a weekly basis. I don’t just take pain meds just to take them. I only take pain meds when necessary at this point. I have a huge respect for any narcotics and any pain meds that could leave you a lifetime addict. In fact, I quit taking any narcotics weeks ago.
#5. I keep recognizing my limits. Not once have I lifted anything over 5 pounds. In fact, 60 days in I still get help putting on my socks and shoes. I’ve trained my mind to think before I do anything. You see, that one wrong move could quickly set you back.
#6. I’m honest with everyone around me. I don’t pretend like I’ve arrived. I let people know that I will do whatever I can, but I will keep taking care of myself. Pretending has no value, especially when it’s only going to sideline you longer.
#7. I threw my pride out the window. I don’t worry about what other people might think. Friends or family that love you will stick by you. They will give you the space and support you need to get better.
#8. I pray, pray, pray. I’m giving my recovery everything I’ve got. But, at the end of the day I’m relying on the GREAT physician more than I am my human physician. I give Him daily all I know I can’t control and no one else can do.
#9. I keep believing God for my healing. My faith only grows stronger by the moment. I fully believe God is taking me on a purposeful journey. It’s not a matter of if, but when that my full healing will take place. Faith carries me often when my flesh completely fails me.
#10. I daily let God use my journey. A huge part of healing is knowing that not one second of your struggle is a waste. God wants to use your struggle to help someone else going through a similar battle. It thrills my heart to know that my weakness is able to reveal God’s strength to others. I can identify so much more now with others who are struggling the same and much more than me.
These are just 10 things I’m doing at this time towards recovery. It’s not an exhaustive list, but it’s likely my top ten. I pray this helps someone else who has been knocked down in life.
Today, I’m so thankful for how far God has taken me. And, I’m super excited about how much further God is going to take me.
(Philippians 1:6)(ESV) And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.
Creating A House Of Love
Posted on July 2, 2016 Leave a Comment
A huge goal of mine is that our family always be full of God’s love. I believe it’s the glue that keeps everyone together. I know it’s something that will carry on for generations to come.
In our house, loving everybody is not an option. It is not acceptable at any time to think you’re better than anyone else. It’s not acceptable to treat anyone any less than you would want to be treated. I think most of society refers to this as “The Golden Rule.” But, I’m afraid for many it’s just a slogan.
It’s important that we all remember that “Loving your neighbor as yourself” is not a man-made idea. In fact, it’s quite natural for us all to be selfish, self-centered, judgmental, and all about us. The only thing that changes any of us is God’s love in us. After all, how can you share something with others you don’t have flowing through your heart?
As parents, we have to be intentional about everything we do. “If you aim for nothing you’ll hit it every time.” My wife and I are clearly aiming to raise four boys full of faith and love. These are not things we think about some days, but every day.
First, please allow me to address the faith issue. Most homes today are living faithless. Just throwing the words around “we have faith” is not enough. Your kids have to see your faith in action. Then need to see you living like a man or woman of God, studying God’s word, praying, and making being a part of a local church a priority. By the way, over 30,000 folks throughout Colleton County alone don’t attend church. Most kids are being raised in homes that don’t even show a sign that faith is anywhere near a priority.
Now, faith was important to mention because it’s only by grace through faith that we are able to receive God’s love into our hearts. Once God’s love consumes our hearts it will spill into our home and family. However, your love must be intentional and you have to constantly teach your kids to do the same. Not just by your words alone, but your genuine actions.
We teach our kids to love the unlovable. We make it clear to our kids that God sees no color, stereotypes, past, but only souls. We make it clear to our kids that if you can help someone hurting or in need, do what you can. Anything less is not of God.
My heart smiles when one of my boys gives someone a hug that could be the only hug they receive. My heart smiles when one of my boys prays with someone struggling. My heart smiles when one of my boys tells me he stood up for someone who was being bullied at school. My heart smiles when there is no doubt my boys know we love them, Jesus loves them, and God has called them on a mission to love others.
Don’t get me wrong. Our home is not perfect in anyway. But, I can promise you that we do everything we can to walk in God’s love and teach our four boys what it means to really live and love like Jesus. This can’t ever be taught by words alone, but parents we must live by example everyday.
(John 14:12)(NIV) My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.
(1 Corinthians 13:1, 4-8)(NIV) If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
Craig Crosby is pastor of Refuge Church of Walterboro a place you will always experience God’s love, grace, & truth. Sunday Services are 9:15 or 11am @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Rd. (Right across from Wells Fargo & McDonalds). For more info got to www.RefugeChurch.org
Lessons In The Storm
Posted on June 27, 2016 1 Comment
I’ve not written an article in quite some time. Why? Because I’ve been consumed for almost 8 weeks with recovering from major back surgery. God has taught me so much during this storm. I would like to share with you just a few of those lessons learned.
#1 God doesn’t always calm the storm. However, He always calms His child. In the midst of a constant battle I’ve found such great peace. Peace that is not dependent upon my ever changing circumstance, but peace that can only be found in a never changing God.
#2 God always has a purpose for the storm. We may feel we’ve just run into some bad luck or experienced an accident. However, nothing happens in our lives apart from God’s knowledge or allowance. With God there are no such things as accidents, but only appointments. God always has a reason for the season you’re going through.
#3 God plans to use the rain. By rain, I’m referring to the trials in your life. God uses things we face to wake us up, grow us up, and lift Himself up. Without rain your faith would never develop. In the midst of uncertainty you learn to trust God more. In the storm, God is developing you into the person He created you to become.
#4 God is still at work even if you feel sidelined. Often, we look at storms in life as nothing but a hindrance. But, maybe God is giving you a pit stop. He is allowing you the opportunity to reflect, regroup, and hopefully return back to life refocused. God is no less at work in the midst of the storm than He was before the storm. He does His greatest work through the storm.
#5 A lot needed to change. While I’ve been out of work and life as I used to know it, God has really opened my eyes. He showed me I was living life way too fast. He showed me I was missing meaningful times with Him. He showed me how to get back to being God-driven instead of self-driven. I’ve decided that I never won’t to return to life as I used to know it. Instead, I want to keep faith walking until the day God calls me home.
“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. 4 So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” (James 1:2-4)(NLT)
Walking In The Rain
Posted on June 6, 2016 Leave a Comment
I don’t even know where to begin right now. One month into recovery from major back surgery God is teaching me so much. I can honestly say it’s been the most painful, purposeful journey I’ve ever been. In fact, I believe this “Faith Walk” journey has just begun. How was I to know that God would use such a dreaded time in my life to breathe life into my soul?
Earlier I walked out the door for my morning recovery walk. The rain that was pouring down made me walk right back inside. I kept waiting on the rain to die down, but it just would not. Finally, I decided that I needed to put on a red poncho and walk anyway. I’m pretty certain I looked like Little Red Riding Hooding walking through my neighborhood.
During that walk God flooded my heart with truth. He reminded me that there is always a purpose for the rain and pain. And as long as I allow Him to continue to lead me forward through the rain, there is nothing to fear. After all, the opposite of faith is fear.
Maybe you’re going through something right now that you just don’t understand. You feel like the rain just won’t stop and the pain is breath taking. Trust me, you just need to keep walking in the rain. Knowing that God is still God. God is still good. God is doing something greater than you can see or comprehend at this time.
(Proverbs 3:5-6) Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
I just started a new message series that you can listen to by going to www.RefugeChurch.org. There you will hear how God birthed in my heart the understanding of this faith walking journey. Also, you can discover how learning to faith walk yourself can change everything about your life.
Seasons Of Perspective
Posted on May 23, 2016 Leave a Comment
Pretty much everything I every write comes from personal experiences or learning from other people’s experiences. Since May 4th my life has been consumed with focusing on recovery from a very painful back surgery. Along with strategically seeking to do my best to get back healthy, I’ve been keeping a daily journal of each day’s progress. According to social media my Day 18 update seemed to relate to most. Maybe it will encourage you.
Day 18 Surgery Recovery Update: Why am I awake at 2am? I just went to sleep around 11pm last night and was sound asleep. At this point that’s a pretty easy question. So far day or night my body screams for some kind of pain medication around every 3 hours. And until I get some kind of relief sleep is never an option.
Right now my active bag of medicines resemble something you would only find by a dying man’s bed side. The good news is I’m not dying even if sometimes I feel like it. Seriously, I can’t believe how far I’ve come and yet the pain still feels so bad many times a day. This is when it really helps to understand the process.
I recall often the words my doctor told me prior to surgery. He said, “This surgery is going to be very painful. You may hate me for at least 6 weeks. But, you might love me in 6 months based on the relief this surgery could provide.
My journey is very similar to what many of you are processing. Whether grieving the loss of someone you loved or healing from some painful accident or procedure.Healing always takes time when the pain is deep. You have moments you feel so much better. Then you have moments when the pain feels just as fresh as before.
I’m very hopeful because I know things will get better with time. I’m also very realistic knowing that moments of pain are normal for this process. Praise God with each day my pain becomes less. The medications I need continue to decrease. I’m able to do things today I could not even think about days before.
For example, 8 days after my surgery I was still spending over 23 hours per day in the bed. Now, I’m up able to sit up several hours a day and walking one to two miles every day with a walker.
You see, progress should never be measured by just feelings. It’s about recognizing how far God has taken you today and trusting God to take you even further tomorrow.Most people recovering from anything tough in life don’t just get back on their feet over night. They simply keep taking the next right step in front of them and God blesses our efforts.
(Ecclesiastes 3:1-8) 3 For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.2 A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest.3 A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up.4 A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance. 5 A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones. A time to embrace and a time to turn away. 6 A time to search and a time to quit searching. A time to keep and a time to throw away. 7 A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak. 8 A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace.
Spice Up Your Marriage
Posted on May 16, 2016 Leave a Comment
There aren’t many things I want to remember from my recent three night hospital stay due to major back surgery. However, one thing I will never forget is what ended up meaning the most during that time. I’ve been so blessed to have hundreds praying for me. All those prayers have and still do mean the world to me. But, one special prayer warrior surfaced during this time that I’m afraid before was extremely underrated.
Contrary to what many believe the average pastor and spouse don’t sit around always singing hymns of faith and praying together. However, I recently rediscovered there is nothing more powerful a married couple can do than hold hands and pray. You will find more lasting power in those divine encounters than any romantic moment.
I don’t recall every moment in the hospital between the pain and the much needed medications. But, I clearly recall every time my wife grabbed my hand and began praying for my relief. I may be the one referred to as the preacher. But there is nothing that touches my heart more than when my wife is my pastor. Her prayers comforted my soul and became one of her greatest expressions of love.
One thing I know for sure after nearly nineteen years of a happy marriage. Your greatest need in marriage is not perfect communication or sparks to fly every time you kiss. Your greatest need in marriage is for both your hearts to be united through God’s spirit, truth, and love. For this reason, Satan does anything he can to keep us from joining hands, hearts, and praying together in Jesus name.
I’m certain many reading this were thinking much differently when I mentioned spicing up your marriage. But, trust me Jesus is the most critical spice for any relationship to thrive. Why? Because apart from Jesus Christ everything falls apart.
Jesus said, “I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains me and I in him, he will bear much fruit. Apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)
Jesus said, “For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”(Matthew 18:20)
Caught In A Storm
Posted on May 2, 2016 2 Comments
Not sure I can explain the long battle I’ve been in the past many months. Every step has been a struggle. Most nights have been filled with pain and often time restlessness. The battle is real, relentless, and more than disruptive to life as I once knew it. Even after making every adjustment possible, I continue to wake up to the reality of this storm.
Doctors say I have a very large annular tear that just won’t heal on its own. I’ve had numerous injections to ease the pain in my lower back. I’ve endured countless hours of physical therapy. I’ve given my body more than enough time to heal. Multiple experienced doctors have concluded surgery is my only option. Therefore, on May 4th I will undergo an (ALIF) Annular Lumbar Interbody Fusion. Hopefully this will finally relieve my discomfort, give my spine greater support, and take pressure off my nerves.
Now, I would have never signed up for this season of torment. I could write a book on all the things this experience has taught me and put me through. I seriously would not change anything. Because I know that God has grown me, used me, and opened my eyes to many things during this seasonal battle.
You know, anytime we are going through something it always feels like a total inconvenience. I admit that I felt that way for a long time. God finally changed my perspective. Instead of thinking I had an accident, I believe God has a purpose for my trial. I firmly believe that nothing happens apart from God allowing it to happen. And if God allowed it to happen then He has a purpose for the inconvenience.
Through this season I have clung to the following words of truth: “THE LORD WILL FIGHT FOR YOU. YOU ONLY NEED TO BE STILL.” (Exodus 14:14). I switched from fighting with God to allowing God to fight for me. I discovered that kicking and screaming changes nothing. Trying to figure it all out fixes nothing. But, choosing to allow God to use the most difficult season in your life changes everything. God willing, this season of my life will soon come to an end.
This May Be Your Biggest Problem
Posted on April 4, 2016 Leave a Comment
What I’m about to write comes out of great conviction. All of us have our share of problems. Not every problem can be solved or easily diagnosed. But, I believe I’ve discovered one of my biggest problems. Sadly, it’s one I really hate to admit as a pastor. Here it goes….
I don’t pray enough. I talk about issues and I process things to death. I seek to allow my thought process to be guided by God’s word. But, I’m convinced that none of that can substitute for good old fashioned prayer. Now, I know faith without works is dead. However, prayer is likely the greatest act of faith we can demonstrate.
What is prayer? Prayer is wholeheartedly seeking the will of God. Prayer is putting on God’s shoulders what you just can’t handle on yours. Prayer is when you trust God with the overwhelming, frustrating, and impossible things in life. Prayer is connecting with a God who cares and who can do more than you could ever dream or imagine.
Ever wonder what message you just didn’t get because you didn’t seek God in prayer? Could there be miracles that have not occurred simply because you chose to do things in your own power? Could you just simply be surviving when earnest consistent prayer would take you to thriving?
It’s always stood out to me how much prayer was a part of Jesus’ life on this earth. (Luke 5:16) says, “Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” We discover time and time again where Jesus just had to get away. It didn’t matter what was going on around him. Prayer was not an afterthought, but a true priority. Through prayer Jesus found peace, direction, and strength. It seemed he was plugging into the greatest power source. His time in prayer helped him deal with life’s struggles. His time in prayer tuned his heart into God’s heart. His time in prayer empowered him to take up his cross and overcome the grave.
I wonder what difference prayer could make in my life. I’m certain it made a huge difference in Jesus’ life. It could reduce our stress, change our hearts, and breathe hope into every situation. Personally, I’ve tried really hard for a long time to fix things around me. I’m thinking it might be time to consistently seek God’s help and divine intervention. This could be the root of many of our problems.
Why Go To Church This Easter?
Posted on March 21, 2016 Leave a Comment
I won’t tell you that not going to Easter service will send you to Hell. I won’t tell you that not going to Easter service will change God’s love for you. And, I won’t tell you that not going to Easter service means you don’t believe in God or His one and only Son, Jesus. What I will tell you is that Easter is a big deal.
I’m convinced that too many believers belittle this historical and life changing event. We fill ball fields and stadiums cheering for our favorite team. We go out of our way to celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, and other signature events. Yet, will we have the same enthusiasm and devotion this Easter?
You see, there is a reason that even secular history books acknowledge the magnitude of Jesus’ birth, death, and resurrection. (B.C.) Before Christ mankind didn’t have a chance, was hopeless, and was destined for Hell. (A.D.) After Christ, every man, woman, boy, & girl was given a chance. A chance to repent, to believe, and to receive eternal life through Jesus Christ our Savior & Lord.
This Easter you could choose to stay home. But, the moment you fully realize all that Christ has done for you, you should rethink your decision. You will realize as I do now that I can’t ever thank God enough for sending His son Jesus to die for my sins. Jesus changed my life forever and it doesn’t matter what you’ve done in your past, Jesus can change yours too.
I pray you make your way to an Easter Celebration. Not just to say you did and take a family photo. But, to celebrate the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. To say, thank you Jesus for I am a life that was changed and eternally grateful.
Should you not have a church home, I want to personally invite you to Refuge Church. We have four identical worship opportunities this Easter. Saturday, March 26th 5pm & 7pm. Sunday, March 27th 9:15am & 11am. We’re located at 203 Eddie Chasteen Dr, Walterboro. Directly across the street from Wells Fargo Bank.
The dress is casual, the people are friendly and the service will have incredible impact on your life. I promise we’ll change the way you think about church. During every service we have light refreshments, activities for Birth-5th graders, and no offering plate will be passed around. Come as you are, Never leave the same!
Are You Leaking?
Posted on March 7, 2016 Leave a Comment
Recently, my physical battle has been great as I battle with a lower back issue doctors say will likely only be fixed by surgery. Friday a week ago, I received my 3rd Lumbar Epidural Steroid Injection in just 4 months. Everything felt like normal until everything didn’t.
As I attempted to get up off the table where I just received the shot I knew something was different. With no warning, pressure rushed to my head like never before. I thought I was having a stroke. As I was forced to lay back down I realized everything from my waist to both my knees were numb. This was beyond disturbing. The staff at this pain center kept me much longer than normal for further observation, but before I left my heart rate and blood pressure were fine and the extreme pain and numbness had subsided.
The next week following my shot would reveal there was still a problem. On top of battling major nerve pain I would begin experiencing headaches that would make any grown man beg for mercy. These terrible headaches would keep me up all night just praying for relief. I thought it might be a side effect from a nerve pain med I recently started but after checking into the hospital this past Friday morning the source of the problem was discovered. Apparently, my last steroid injection left me with a cerebral spinal fluid leak. That leak was the cause of the extreme pain in my head. I was overjoyed to discover the root of my misery and get relief from those atrocious headaches. Praise God, doctors were able to patch this leak with blood they transferred from my arm. I’m now able to just focus on healing.
Now, God has led me to say this to you. All of us have pain. It’s very important we recognize and deal with the root of that pain. Otherwise, if we don’t it will leak things into our minds and hearts that aren’t good. Unprocessed pain makes us someone we never wanted to be. And keeps us from becoming all God created us to be. We can’t try to ignore it, numb it, or or run from it. But, if you don’t deal with the pain in your life it will deal with you.
I encourage you to give your pain to a God who cares deeply about you (1 Peter 5:7). Share your pain with others as this kind of confession brings healing (James 5:16). Know that only Jesus can give you lasting peace (John 16:33). Only God can fully understand. And, God often takes the greatest struggles and creates the greatest stories.
(Romans 8:28)(NLT)And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Join Pastor Craig Crosby Sundays 9:15 or 11am @ Refuge Church. The church is located @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Dr, Walterboro. Come as you are. Don’t expect to the leave the same.
Hold My Hand
Posted on February 29, 2016 1 Comment
I know many remember the song by Hootie And The Blowfish called “Hold My Hand.” Or what about the oldie, but goody that says “Lean on me. When you’re not strong. And, I’ll be your friend. I’ll help you carry on. For, it won’t be long. Till I’m gonna need. Somebody to lean on.” I’m not sure any truer words have every been spoken.
We all have times in our lives that we just just need a hand to hold. We just need to know somebody cares and somebody is there. I know recently, it’s meant the world to me to feel the support of those who sincerely care. Not just by what they say, but what they choose to do.
A local nurse recentlly said something I still find very profound. She said, “I’m not sure there is anything more powerful than holding someone’s hand.” We discussed the fact that this is especially true when someone is really struggling and feeling alone. Even if a person can’t communicate to you it doesn’t mean they can’t be blessed by your presence.
I recall countless times throughout my ministry that I’ve realized there was nothing more I could do for the one struggling. Prayers had been spoken, but there was nothing left for man to fix. However, there was one thing I discovered I could do when possible. I could hold their hand.
I believe when a sincere Child of God grabs the hand of another something special happens. God’s love is transferred from one heart to to another. The person lying in that bed no longer feels alone as God uses us to be His angel.
So, the next time you feel you can’t do anything more to comfort that person you dearly love. And, you’re wondering what you can do. Just reach out, grab their hand, and let God’s love flow through you. You will be surprised just how much it means to know you’re not alone.
(Genesis 2:18) “The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.”
Dear Mom & Dad
Posted on February 18, 2016 Leave a Comment
I’m about to turn 41 years old. I’ve been happily married for 18 and 1/2 years. I’ve got four boys ages 16, 14, 12, and 6. I’ve been a minister for 21 years. I realize more everyday how blessed I am to have the parents that raised me. I would like to explain and express just what I mean. Not to compare them to others, but to encourage other moms and dads.
My dad Steve Crosby, a former Marine has been a local pastor practically my entire life. My mom, Helen Crosby was a school teacher for years and most of all a daily teacher inside our home. Neither of my parents are perfect, but I can confidently say they are way beyond average. Here are just a few things that set them apart from most.
- Thanks Mom & Dad For Loving Jesus. At our house, we didn’t just talk about faith. We were taught God’s word and that faith in Christ was all that mattered. We learned that in this life you will have trouble, but with God’s help you can make it through anything. Not going to church weekly together was not even an option. I’m grateful that I learned early in life to look to Jesus, not this world for my peace, purpose, and hope.
- Thanks Mom & Dad For Loving Each Other. I cringe to bring this up because I realize most marriages today end in divorce. Yet, something special happens when two people are led by faith and keep working at their love commitment. I don’t know what it’s like to be torn between two parents or homes. I don’t know what it’s like to worry about my family falling apart at any moment. Thanks mom and dad for continuing to work through your struggles with God’s help. I’m glad you’re still together.
- Thanks Mom & Dad For Unconditional Love. At our house there were expectations. There were non-negotiables. But there was never an absense of unconditional love. I’ve never doubted my parent’s love. I can remember being told we want you to do your best, but our love will never change. Thanks mom and dad for loving me no matter what I did or did not do.
- Thanks Mom & Dad For Always Praying. I’m learning myself as my kids get older that you can’t do everything for your children. You can always pray for them. I always knew my parents were praying for me and lifting up my struggles to God. I sincerely believe those prayers have carried me to anywhere I am today. Thanks mom and day for all the morning, daytime, and late night prayers!
- Thanks Mom & Dad For Leading By Example. I said earlier, my parents aren’t perfect. However, I’ve never doubted their integrity and efforts towards being all God has called them to be. I’m not sure there is anything a parent can say that is more important than what they do. None of us can be perfect parents, but our children need to see we’re at least trying to practice what we preach. Otherwise, most of what we say will fall on deaf ears. Thanks mom and dad for continuing to set a Godly example in life.
Mom and Dad I love you, appreciate you, and I will not forget these principles as I continue to raise my children. Thanks for being such a blessing!
(Ephesians 6:1-3) Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
More Than A Test Drive
Posted on February 15, 2016 Leave a Comment
Recently I took my oldest son out for lunch. Afterwards, I told him he could drive us home. All it took was him backing the car up and putting it in drive. Next thing I knew my blood pressure was rising very similiar to the last time we tried that experiment.
In hopes of not spoiling our time together, I quickly took back the driver’s position. I could see the frustration on his face. I’m sure he figured he would never have more than his driver’s permit. It was at that moment I realized I drastically needed to change my approach.
I told him we weren’t headed home, but would be going somewhere with much less traffic. The first thing I did was start covering the basics of driving. I showed him how to be cautious, prepare to turn, make a turn, park, parallel park, and make a three point turn. Then, I allowed him to do all those things as I played coach. Most importantly, I approached him with a much greater patience and purpose.
Sadly, I had been expecting him to know things I never took time to teach him. With little experience, I expected him to pull out into a busy highway and make all the right decisions. No wonder he felt overwhelmed and seemed totally unprepared. I never covered the basics or gave him enough opportunity to gain experience.
When we got home from over an hour of driving basics my son hugged my neck. He said, “Thanks for taking me to practice driving. Most of all thank you for not blowing your top while I was driving.” Honestly, I believe I learned way more that day than him.
I was reminded that we can’t expect our children to know things we don’t teach them. We must take time to love them, show them, teach them and encourage them in the way they should go. And, our attitude will make all the difference.
In the past, my son had every right to feel frustrated while driving. Thank God his dad learned how to settle down and teach him on his level. I don’t think it will be long before he is ready for that license.
(Proverbs 22:6) Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.
(Ephesians 6:4) Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
She Won The P.H.T. Award
Posted on February 6, 2016 Leave a Comment
Let me begin by saying this is far from my wife’s idea. She has no clue I’m about to tell the world what makes her so awesome. Honestly, she would rather be punched in the face repeatedly than to be swarmed by recognition. That is just one more reason I love her.
What in the world is a P.H.T. Award? I actually never knew myself until around 2001. The seminary I received my Masters Degree from in Fort Worth, Texas sent this certificate to my wife Aimee. P.H.T. stands for Putting Him Through. I still find it very thoughtful that even others recognized the significance of my wife’s support.
Thinking about this award has prompted me the reasons she deserves this award. I could share a million ways she has touched my heart and gotten me through so much. But, here are five things that makes her an above average “First Lady.”
#1 She Never Leaves Me Lonely. No one gets married to be alone. You get married in hopes that you can share life together. My wife has never made me feel alone or left my side. In a day and age when people leave at the first sign of difficulty, I would say she is above average. I’ve said many times that since I got married years ago, I’ve never had even a feeling of loneliness.
#2 She Understands Real Love. She has actually taught me by her example what real love is. I’ve learned from her that talk is cheap, but love is an action verb. She realizes that love is more than just feelings or words. Her daily love demonstrates the following traits that God’s word says define real love.
(1 Corinthians 13:4-8) Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
#3 She Meant Her Vows. You know that part of your wedding ceremony. We said, “For richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, for better or worse. To you I pledge my love.” She continues to love me at my worst, when my health is failing, when my attitude stinks, and when the bank account comes close to empty. None of these things has changed her commitment or the demonstration of her unconditional love.
#4 She Always Makes Time For Me. Of course, we both love our four boys dearly. And, yes they demand a lot of her time and energy. Yet, she doesn’t just live for the kids. She continues to be my help mate, my best friend, and the love of my life. We still date, have adult talk, and grow closer daily. She realizes that one day the kids will be grown and it will just be the two of us contuining to grow old together. Hopefully we’ll have matching rocking chairs!
#5 She Supports Me Unconditionally. Many underrate the power of support. I know firsthand what it means for someone to believe in you when you’ve lost belief in yourself. I know what it means for someone to support you from a dark place back to a happier place. You name it my wife has done it. And, it only makes me love her more.
Over the years, we’ve made a lot of big moves and sacrifices together. We’ve actually moved all of our belongings & family at least 14 different times as we’ve followed God’s dream for our lives. Many see things that I’ve accomplished and things I do. But, let me assure you that behind any good man is an even greater woman. Therefore, my wife Aimee Crosby is more than deserving of her P.H.T. award.
Some reading this don’t get the recognition you deserve. Don’t ever think your love, support, sacrifice and commitment are meaningless. God sees it all and others appreciate your efforts. Your role is just as important as what those you support are doing.
(Ecclesiastes 4:9-10) Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.
Will You Rub My Feet?
Posted on January 26, 2016 Leave a Comment
Recently, I was visiting one of my favorite patients. He is literally in his last days. The least I can do is provide him some spiritual comfort. This man always tells me he loves me and never grows tired of me singing his favorite hymns. I mean never grows tired. I usually just have to let him know that I can’t stay with him all day.
As I got ready to leave his bedside, I made the mistake of asking him a question. I said, “Sir, is there anything I can do for you today?” He said, “Yes, will you rub my feet they hurt so bad?” For a moment, I did consider saying let me go get your nurse. Then, God grabbed my heart and assured me this mission was for me.
I admit to wondering just what this would like look to anyone who might suddenly enter the room. After all, I was just the chaplain and for some reason I was rubbing another man’s feet. But, God really spoke deeply to my heart during this experience.
Rubbing his feet for the next twenty minutes many things went through my mind. I was reminded we should never think we are above doing something. That we really should love our neighbor as ourselves. After all, what if that were me lying helpless in that bed. Yes, God was humbling me and showing me what it really means to be His servant.
As I looked up this man was smiling ear to ear. After a while he was just so relaxed and grateful. I could see God using something so simple to connect our hearts even deeper. That man knew I didn’t have to rub his feet. But, it meant the world to him that I was willing to bring him such comfort.
When I finished, he grabbed my hand and reminded me he loved me. I reminded him that God loved him and sent me there to express that love to him. And, in this case to show that love to him. You see, sometimes actions do speak louder than words.
(Matthew 25:45)(NLT) Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help me.”
The Brain Is Broke, The Spirit Is Alive
Posted on January 19, 2016 1 Comment
He was lying in bed seemingly asleep. I entered the room and our eyes met for the first time. Some would think he was totally confused. Many would not even attempt to have a conversation with someone doctors say has lost their mind. But, experience has taught me that as long as the soul is there, so is the person.
This hospice patient looked deeply into my eyes as God created a heart connection between us. I began to sing familiar hymns full of truth and he just listened. I read scripture from God’s word and assurred him of God’s continued presence. I reminded him that even when words don’t come, God still hears each prayer. I did wonder for a few minutes whether he was really understanding what I was saying.
But, then he grabbed my hand very firmly. He looked at me as if we had been part of the same family for years. I could tell quickly that the same spirit that lives in me, lives in him. From that moment on I knew our time together was more than words.
I observed what I’ve seen so many times with others who can’t speak, but still have faith in Christ. God’s spirit communicates things words can’t express. Somehow God speaks things from one heart to another. You can feel God’s presence strongly in the room. What might sound like a one sided conversation is actually a divine encounter. An encounter not established by man, but created by God.
Maybe you have a loved one that can’t think or communicate like they did in the past. Maybe they can’t even recall your name or verbally respond to your words. Realize that words aren’t always necessary to communicate love, faith, or hope. A simple prayer by their bedside can lift their faith. The reading of scripture can bring hope. A hymn of faith could remind them that God is still there. And, just God’s presence working through you can assure them they are still loved dearly.
(Romans 8:26)And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.
Are You Color Blind?
Posted on January 4, 2016 Leave a Comment
I’m about to ask you a question I believe matters deeply to the heart of God. It’s a question everyone needs to be asked. Or we can just ignore an issue that is very near and dear to the heart of God. That question my friend is “Are you color blind?”
Growing up in the south I’m well aware of the word “racism.” And, I realize that most people aren’t trying to be racist, but it’s just in their blood. They were raised in societies that naturally segregated themselves and were usually taught to hang out with their “own color.”
I can recall on more than a few occasions someone saying to me, “Preacher, I just believe God wants us to stick with our kind.” Their “our kind” was referring to our own race. I’ve thought long and hard about this statement. I’ve searched scripture to ponder this matter. Here is what I’ve concluded.
#1 GOD HAS NO FAVORITES
The popular childhood song got it right. “Red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in His sight.” God loves us all the same. In fact, the bible says “God so loved the World that He gave His only son that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life.” (John 3:16). God created every color and loves us all the same.
#2 GOD SEES SOULS, NOT SKIN
I honestly believe God is color blind. He knows the outside is just skin making one man look different than the next. God wants the best for all of us. Regardless of our skin color, he loves us deeply and wants us all to know it. Sadly, even most of churches don’t reflect God’s point of view. Many focus on simply gathering those around them that appear “their kind.” Or let’s be honest their race.
#3 GOD HATES RACISM
God doesn’t approve of symbols that only escalate racial divide. God doesn’t approve of any organization that only promotes their race matters. God hates it when we look at each other through racist eyes. When we repeat racist jokes and behavior passed down by generations before us. Bottom line, God hates it when a man’s skin color changes the way we see the man. “Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)
God has really put it heavy on my heart this issue must be addressed. We must quit separating ourselves by the color of our skin. You see, we all bleed red. We all fall short of God’s glorious standard. And, we all desperately need a Savior named Jesus who died because He loves us all. When going through life don’t just think about “your kind.” Realize there is only one kind. Men, women, boys, and girls who were handcrafted by God. Those who are all special in the eyes of God.
(Romans 10:11) “For God does not show favoritism.”
Whatever your race, you are very special to God. If you don’t have a church home, I would love for you to visit me at Refuge Church. Services are Sundays 9:15 and 11am @ 203 Eddie Chasteen Drive, Walterboro. Come as you are, Never leave the same.
If I Only Had One Year Left
Posted on December 26, 2015 Leave a Comment
What if 2016 was the last year you had on planet earth? Suppose your doctor after studying test results looks at you and says, “I’m sorry, but based on what we’ve discovered you have only a year or less to live.” No doubt this revelation would change the way you approach this life. Trust me, as a hospice chaplain and minister for over 21 years this kind of news is always life changing. I’ve observed countless folks who just discovered this kind of news and it’s always life changing.
I love the song “Live Like You Were Dying” by Tim McGraw. However, if I knew death was near I would not be making plans to go sky dying, rocky mountain climbing, nor would I care about riding some bull. Forgive me if any of those things are at the top of your bucket list. Here are some things that would probably top the list for each of us if we thought this year was our last.
#1 I would THANK GOD FOR EACH DAY.
Usually when I ask a person who knows they are dying, “How are they doing?” There reply is, “I’m just thankful God woke me up!” You see, they are truly thankful for each breath and another day on planet earth.
(Psalm 118:24) “This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.:
#2 I would PREPARE TO TRANSITION.
I still can’t believe the words of a 103 year old man who lives in an area Nursing Home. I asked him, “What do you think happens when you die? He replied, “Hadn’t even thought about it.”
I said, “Sir, I think once a person reaches a hundred it’s about time to start thinking about life after death…don’t you think?”
“I won’t care, I’ll be dead” he replied, to which I responded, “But, sir you will care…because we are each made to live eternally. The only question that remains is where we will live eternally. Heaven or Hell.”
(Ecclesiastes 3:11) “…God has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”
(Hebrews 9:27) people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment,
#3 I would MAKE THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT.
I’ll never forget one of my sickest hospice patients looking me square in the eyes and saying, “Pastor, I’m more blessed than you.” I replied, “How is that sir?” He said, “Because I know how to live like I’m dying. I seek to make the most of every moment.”
(Ephesians 5:16-17) making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.
#4 I would VALUE RELATIONSHIPS.
Never heard any man or woman tell me this at the end of their life, “I spent way too much time with my friends and family.” Or,“I wish I would have spent less time with my family and friends.” It’s always “I wish I would have spent more time with those I love.”
(1 John 4:7-8) “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God…”
#5 I would SEEK GOD’S WILL WHOLEHEARTEDLY.
Do you know what I think is one of the greatest problems with professing Christians and therefore the church today? Very few are living with a true sense of urgency….Very few are wholeheartedly seeking God’s will.
(James 4:13-17) 13 Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” 14 Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15 Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” 16 As it is, you boast and brag. All such boasting is evil. 17 Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins.
#6 I would LIVE WITH ETERNITY IN MIND.
If you’re like most, you got a lot of stuff this Christmas. Two days after Christmas, I visited with a man who only has weeks to live and I asked him if he had a good Christmas.He said, “Yes, I think so. I got a few things, but I haven’t gotten around to opening any of them.” Over on the bed next to him was a stack of “Things” wrapped in boxes and gift wrap. Those things really didn’t have a lot of value to this man at this time in his life.”
(Matthew 6:19-20) 19 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.
#7 I would WANT TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
I have a patient who just drew his last breath this past weekend. I find it amazing that every time he woke up the last week of his life he spoke one recurring theme. He says, “Pastor, I just want to touch one more life. I just want to make a difference in one more life.”
(Matthew 5:16) “Let your light so shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”
My friends we only get one dash between when we are born and when we will die. Either we live in such a way that matters or our dash on this earth will be wasted. My prayer is that this article will inspire you to live this year as if it were your last. You don’t need a doctor or a preacher to tell you that you need to live each day as if you’re dying. Now, go make 2016 the best year of your life!
*If you don’t have a church home please join us @ Refuge Church. On January 3rd, we’ll be starting a message series entitled “2016 Difference Makers.” Worship with us Sundays 9:15 or 11 am. Located at 203 Eddie Chasteen Drive, Walterboro. Come as you are, Never leave the same.
Pain Speaks Loudly
Posted on December 10, 2015 1 Comment
Pain comes in many forms. Physically, emotionally, or mentally we can all be knocked down quickly. Maybe you’re processing the sudden loss of someone you never imagined living without. Maybe you’ve experienced some tragedy that has changed every bit of life as you once knew it. It really doesn’t matter where the pain stems from it always speaks loudly. It’s very important we don’t miss what the pain is saying to us.
- PAIN REVEALS OUR HUMANITY. None of us are immune to hardship. None of us can escape physical or emotional pain. You could be healthy all your life and find out tomorrow you have cancer. You could have thought you could handle anything, but then find yourself in a battle way over your head. Pain reminds us we aren’t in control and we all have human limitations.
- PAIN REMINDS US WE NEED GOD’S HELP. As you fight to even get out of bed you suddenly realize you were never strong enough. Every day of your life is a God made day as He alone breathes life into us. It often takes uncontrollable pain and circumstance to help us realize our desperate need for a Savior named Jesus.
- PAIN MAKES US GRATEFUL. Not sure there is a truer statement than “You don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone.” Pain teaches us that nothing should be assumed or taken for granted. You really don’t know what tomorrow will bring and every good gift comes from God. Every day we should thank God for our health, relationships, and circumstances. Because any of those things could be gone tomorrow.
- PAIN CHANGES OUR PERSPECTIVE. Not until we’re on our knees can we begin to see life through different eyes. Before that moment, we’re too busy feeling large and in charge. Suddenly we find ourselves flat on our back and realizing that life is a precious gift. God often uses our most painful experiences to develop within us a different attitude and perspective.
- PAIN FORCES US TO “WAIT ON GOD.” There are many pains that can’t be healed by a bottle or pill. There are many pains that just don’t go away overnight. You have to call on God, trust God, and wait on God for the healing. Healing is often a process, but rarely an event. Pain forces us to be patient and dependent on God. Let’s admit it. None of us enjoy pain or discomfort. Yet, there is no denying that God speaks loudly through every second of it. During my present pain a lady in my church sent me the following quote. It certainly spoke to my heart.
“Every person experiences pain, but only the child of God experiences purposeful pain.” – Skip Heitzig
“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” – Romans 8:28 (NLT)
Find Your Shut-Off Valve
Posted on December 5, 2015 1 Comment
You’ve got to hear what I’m about to say. Ignoring this message will affect your marriage, your family, your sanity, and many other things in between. Many reading this right now need to realize this message is not just for your neighbor, but it’s one we all need to take to heart.
We live in a world that only knows one speed called “Wide Open.” We run here and we run there. Often we say, I just don’t know how I’m going to get everything done. I’ve got so much on my schedule and there just aren’t enough hours in the day. Does this sound too familiar?
I readily admit that for too many years I’ve run around like a chicken with my head cut off. Of course, my excuses were very convincing. I just HAD to go to that next meeting. This person over here needs me right now. And, if I don’t do this or that the world will certainly fall apart. I’m not just choosing to be busy, life is just busy. We all just need to put our big boy britches and accept it.
Well, I’ve finally concluded that I can’t keep up with this world. In fact, I’ve quit trying to see how fast I can run. I’ve discovered that all it guarantees is that you will neglect your family, you will lose your joy, and burnout will come. Honestly, I just got sick and tired of being sick and tired.
It wasn’t until my health slowed me down that I found my shut-off valve. I realized that I was so busy living life that I was missing key moments in my life. I had a vision to help everyone else, but no true plan in place to keep myself or family healthy. One of the first steps I had to take was learning how to say “No”. I realized that saying no often is not only an option, but necessary.
You see, man brings guilt, but God brings conviction. God has clearly convicted me that I need to slow down. There has to be cut-off points in my life. There has to be times that I make my marriage and my family a top priority. I have to constantly make sure that I live with clear boundaries and most importantly healthy boundaries. Otherwise, I will live life too fast like everybody else. And, I will be miserable like everyone else.
I presently do one third of what I used to do. I say no often to the wrong things, so I can say yes to the right things. I seek to remind myself daily how running too fast will cost me way too much. I can’t follow the patterns of this world and expect different results. I have to use my shut-off valve often and not get caught up in the rat race around me.
(Romans 12:2)(NLT) Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
(1 Corinthians 10:23)(NLT) You say, “I am allowed to do anything”–but not everything is good for you. You say, “I am allowed to do anything”–but not everything is beneficial.
(Matthew 5:37)(NIV) Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one
My Family Almost Drowned
Posted on November 23, 2015 1 Comment
We had just gotten the news that a nearby dam broke. We knew the flood waters were headed our way. There was simply no way to escape this natural disaster. My heart was pounding as I frantically sought to prepare my wife and four boys for the unknown ahead.
Through a house window we could see the water gushing our way from a distance. I became very emotional as I really didn’t know if I would ever see my family again here on earth. Everyone was holding on tightly to each other, just bracing for the worse. My five year old had his arms locked around my neck just hoping his daddy would take care of him.
One of my sons asked, “Daddy, why are you crying so much?” I said, “Guys I just love you all so much. And, I don’t want anything to happen to any of you.” He says, “Daddy, it’s not like we’re going to die or something.” I quickly replied, “Son, I can’t promise you what’s going to happen next. Let’s just pray right now and put it all in God’s hands.”
Praise God, right after that my cell phone rang. As I checked to see who was calling I realized I had just been dreaming. Never was I anymore thankful that this was just a dream. I immediately went into the kitchen, gave my wife a great big hug and told her I just had the worst dream ever.
Ironically, I had gone to bed the night before preparing a sermon entitled “Guard Your Home.” This served as a reminder that none of us know what tomorrow or even the next moment will hold. We have to do everything we can to prepare ourselves and our family for the next unknown moment.
Truth is we’re all going to die someday. There should never be a day we don’t live with eternity in mind. Daily we should express our love for one another. Never should we lose sight that in the end, only our hope in Jesus Christ will remain.
(Hebrews 13:8)(NIV) Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
(Romans 10:9)(NIV) If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.
(Hebrews 6:19)(NIV) We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.
When You’re Going Through Hell
Posted on November 15, 2015 Leave a Comment
I’ve been in one of the toughest, most intense battles of my life. I feel like flaming arrows are coming from every direction. Physically I’ve never felt worse. Emotionally, I’m one step away from the crazy house. Yet, spiritually I actually feel stronger than ever before. Put all that together and I’m a pretty hot mess. During this time, I’ve learned some very important lessons.
One, if you choose to surrender everything to God expect adversity. Satan doesn’t bother you near as much if you’re just coasting through life. He loves it when you just go with the flow of society. Yet, when you decide to let God make an above average difference through you, expect your enemy the devil to attack.
Two, in your toughest seasons you should never walk alone. The worst thing you can do during an already trying time is to play lone ranger. You desperately need others there for you, praying for you, and walking with you through this time. Walking alone drastically decreases your odds of making it to the other side.
Thirdly, your faith will grow most during crisis. None of us enjoy trials, but there is no denying this is when God does His greatest work within us. We learn to hold on when otherwise we would fall apart. We learn to trust God even when things don’t appear promising. God uses the crisis to draw us closer than ever to Himself. God uses the crisis to make our faith stronger than ever before.
Finally, I’ve learned that God is faithful. God will carry you when you feel you can’t carry on. God will bring things together even when you’re far from having it all together. God honors those who seek to honor Him. He always provides, protects, and does immeasurably more than we could ever dream or take credit for ourselves.
My battles on this earth are far from over. There will always be another valley to go through or mountain to climb. This I know for sure. God is with me, God is for me, and God will help me handle whatever comes my way.
“What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31)
Join Pastor Craig Crosby Sundays 9:15 or 11am @ Refuge Church. Come As You Are, Never Leave The Same.
ATTENTION: Colleton County Unchurched
Posted on November 1, 2015 4 Comments
Come As You Are, Never Leave The Same
I’m sure this article will offend someone, but I can honestly say I have no selfish agenda as I write these words. If you already attend church this article isn’t for you. If you live in Colleton County and are one of the nearly 30,000 folks that don’t attend church, this message is for you.
Yes, I realize there are many reasons people don’t attend church. Some feel the church is full of hypocrites, boring, irrelevant, self-centered, after their money and just another social club. I’m not even going to attempt to argue with you about these accusations. In fact, I fully understand why many of you may feel the way you do. However, maybe you’ve just not had the best of experiences.
Before I go any further, please let me say that I know several great pastors and churches in the area. Believers that would give you the shirt off their back if they really knew you were in need. Folks that spend most of their days trying to leave this world a better place.
For the record, I don’t believe churches need to change the truth. I believe God meant every word He wrote in His best selling book called the Bible. I believe whether you’ve ever darkened the doors of a church or not, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God. To know God’s truth and to not follow that truth is sin. And, sin will always separate us from a right relationship with God. Thank God for His amazing grace!
Now, God did put it heavy on my heart a few years ago to start a church here that approaches things differently than most. A place where people can truly “Come As They Are.” A place where people will never feel judged, but always loved. A place where the truth is always presented in a relevant way that changes people’s everyday lives. A place where people can wear what they have, give what they can, and never leave the same. A place that “Changes The Way You Think About Church.”
In March 2011, my wife and I started Refuge Church after a lot of prayer. It probably appeared foolish for a family of six to rent the Colleton Rec Center for weekly worship. All we knew was God had called us to this mission and that was all that mattered. You see, I learned a long time ago that God’s plans don’t have to make sense to any of us. If you do what’s right, you can’t go wrong.
After setting up for weekly Sunday worship the past 2 years and 8 months, God has more than proven His faithfulness. Word has traveled that Refuge Church is a place that is very serious about meeting people on their front porch. We understand you don’t care how much we know, until you know how much we care.
Hundreds of previously unchurched folks have walked through those Recreation doors. Many touched by the genuine love they’ve felt. Many shocked by the fact that we’ve never even passed around an offering plate. As one gentlemen said, “I just don’t think most people believe church could ever be like this.” I’ve often said that anytime you mix calling, compassion, competancy, and consistency you will discover something great.
Refuge has grown from a family of six to a house full of worshippers. We offer two identical Sunday morning worship experiences where lives are always changed. Most importantly, the majority of our members were once like some of you. They never attended church before, nor did they have any desire to do so. Now, we can’t keep them outside the doors.
This Sunday, November 8th Refuge Church will relocate into our own 24/7 Worship Facility. Many will feel right at home in our new building located right in the heart of Walterboro. If you are among the many unchurched please join us Sundays @ 9:15am or 11am. I guarantee we’ll change the way you think about church. Learn more about our vision and what to expect at www.RefugeChurch.org.
Our new location is 203 Eddie Chasteen Drive. Right across from Wells Fargo and beside Walterboro Eye Care Center.
(Hebrews 10:25) And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.
Lessons From The “Band Of Blue”
Posted on October 26, 2015 Leave a Comment
The band of blue is about to kickoff a new season. It’s my son Joel’s second year playing in the Colleton County High School Band of Blue. Tom Finigan and his staff do an amazing job of assembling together one of the best high school bands in the state. Anyone looking closely can see their effort and the results of their hard work. As lead pastor of Refuge Church, I know how much sweat and prayer goes into leading something that strives daily to be above average. I can promise you things don’t just happen by accident. Here are some things you’ll observe that are key to Big Blue’s success.
- VISION.
Before I ever moved to Walterboro, I heard of the Band of Blue. Not because I was a big band person, but because vision travels. It is clear the Band of Blue strives to be the best high school band possible year in and year out. Band members come and band members go. Yet, the vision is bigger than it’s members and outlives any single performance. Those who sign up for the Band of Blue understand that it is a movement greater than any one person. Everyone matters, but following the vision is what’s best for everyone to accomplish much.
- TEAMWORK.
When it comes to the Band of Blue, I’m very impressed with its team work. Parents, boosters, teenagers and the community all work together in making this band a success. The more unselfish people you have working together to accomplish a common goal, the greater chance you have of accomplishing that goal. What makes Big Blue great? The people who work together to make it great.
- ATTENTION TO DETAIL.
Accomplishing anything big always starts with doing a bunch of little things well. They are constantly practicing, tweaking, evaluating and striving to do a little better than before. They evaluate past performances, transitions, props, processes and anything that might help them perform at a greater level. They celebrate accomplishments, but then its back to discovering ways to improve.
- STRIVING FOR EXCELLENCE.
They are proud, but not content. There is nothing wrong with being proud of your effort. But, where things begin to fall is when we think we’ve arrived. The Band of Blue understands they are always a work in progress. Each and every day they strive to improve towards their goal of excellence. Excellence is simply seeking to do the very best you can and leaving the results in God’s hands.
- FUELED BY PASSION & HEART.
I’ve seen firsthand Tom Finigan’s heart and passion for the Band of Blue. He is not just focused on process, but on developing people. He has already left my almost 15 year old better than he found him. Passion and heart are contagious. It’s not something you pretend, but will reveal itself over time. Today, many share Tom’s heart and passion to see young people perform and develop to the best of their ability.
My friends, these are principles that will make any organization, mission or church great. There are no short cuts to success. It’s always a daily grind of taking the next right step in front of you. The Colleton County Band of Blue seems to do that as well as anyone. I can promise you this, I will seek to lead my church in the same fashion. I encourage you if you can to go out and checkout the band of blue this season. Go Big Blue!
(Philippians 3:12-14)Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
A Big Lesson From The Head Ball Coach
Posted on October 14, 2015 3 Comments
The Head Ball Coach
The college football world has been dominated with the recent and sudden resignation of University of South Carolina Head Football Coach Steve Spurrier. For years, he has been a proven winner on the field. He certainly carried an average USC football program to greater heights than ever on the field. Yet, I feel one of his greatest accomplishments was likely when he chose to step off the field.
Anyone who has ever watched this man knows he is a true competitor, fighter and loves to win. As a college football player he walked away with their most coveted honor the heisman trophy. As a college football coach he has posted nothing but winning records everywhere he has gone. Suddenly at the age of 70 he found himself sputtering. In fact, he had to admit to himself he was no longer the effective leader he once was. This year’s team reflected his struggle and his ineffectiveness.
Absolutely no one expected Spurrier to resign midway through the college season. But, he shocked the world when he said, “I’m Done. My run here is over and it’s time for me to move on.” Some called him a quitter and others may have felt he left on a losing note since his team was sitting at 2-4. But, I say he left a winner as he showed great leadership character.
You see, too many leaders today let their pride stand in the way of making right decisions. Too many leaders today let the postion they hold define who they are as a person. Spurrier knew his coaching spoke for itself. He knew staying in his position would just hinder the progress of the mission he fought so hard to build over the last decade. In the end, he determined it was best he got out of the way and let new leadership take things further.
I really believe most leaders today aren’t man enough to make such prompt decisions. Life is full of seasons, assignments and times when change is absolutely necessary. We all have to recognize when it’s our season to step up and when its time to step down.
Trust me, I know what it’s like to immediately walk away from something you’ve poured your heart into and step down as a leader because you realize you’re no longer the best man for the job. No amount of money, recognition, or comfort should dictate us otherwise. I have found there is no greater fulfillment than to be who God made you to be and where God has called you to be. We need to listen to his voice and be willing to move promptly when he says move.
As I write this, I fully believe there is someone needing to hear this message. You know in your heart if you’re just drawing a pay check and holding onto a position you need to release. You know in your heart if it’s time for you to move on, but you’ve not admitted it to yourself or others.
My friends, it’s worth getting over your pride and moving on. You’re moving on will give you greater peace as you make yourself available to whatever God has for you next. It will also allow the next right someone to step into your present position and take things forward. Don’t be afraid to obey God’s voice and make the right decisions promptly. Here are a couple verses you might take to heart.
(1 Timothy 3:1)”Here is a trustworthy saying: Whoever aspires to be an overseer desires a noble task.”
(John 10:27)”My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me.”
(2 Timothy 1:7) “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”
God’s Not Done With Me Yet
Posted on October 5, 2015 Leave a Comment
Pre-Surgery Prayer
As I write this, tears are rolling down my face. I’m exhausted from getting up at 4am to see a dear friend prior to his triple bypass surgery. I’m even more relieved that God is not done with my friend just yet. At just 38 years of age, none of us saw this day coming. However, last friday revealed Trey Asbelle was facing a true life or death situation.
I learned quite a bit of history on the day Trey’s three major heart blockages were revealed. Heart issues run strong in his family. Trey’s dad passed away suddenly at age 42 from a heart attack. His granddad passed away at age 40 from the same. I’m more than certain these past statitics were rolling through trey’s head as he waited three long days for mandatory surgery. Doctor’s say he could easily have passed away anytime over the past year.
God gave me a strong peace as I stood by Trey’s bedside. I’ve learned over time that with God statistics are thrown out the window. With God in the mix it doesn’t matter what happened in the past, but simply what is God’s will in the present. I actually began to get excited deep within as I believe this is just the beginning of Trey’s God’s story.
Trey and I became friends after I was the hospice chaplain for his “Pops” or granddad. We also got to know each other through our mutual love for Gamecock Football. Trey has allowed me the opportunity to minister to nearly 100,000 Gamecock Born & Bred fans through his Facebook page that continues to grow. It was his idea that I continue to share weekly scripture and inspirational thoughts. He would always say, “I want this to be bigger than me and actually make a difference in people’s lives.” He never backed down from this statement as we still work together to this day.
During out time together, I’ve seen Trey come to faith in Christ and continue to grow in his faith. I’ve never doubted that God had big plans for a man who once only knew how to celebrate a ball team. As I shared on facebook of recent. “Often it takes the fear of losing what matters to realize what matters most.” I have no doubt that Trey has learned that lesson well.
As we gathered early for pre-surgery prayer, I only asked Trey to do one thing. I said, “Please make sure you don’t waste this God story. Because God is about to do something really special through your life.” I honestly believe Trey’s best days are yet to come. His faith in Christ has taken him far. Once again God has proven his faithfulness. May we all now pray for his continued recovery as God continues to write the next chapters of his God story.
My friends it doesn’t matter where you’ve been or what you’ve been through. God wants to use it all for you good and His glory! “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28)
Join Pastor Craig and many others Sundays @ Refuge Church. “Come You As You Are, Never Leave The Same.” Find out more info @ http://www.RefugeChurch.org
My 5 Year Old Missionary
Posted on October 1, 2015 Leave a Comment
Recently, a dear friend and former next door neighbor become one of my hospice patients. We had not seen each other in a few years. The patient had not seen any of my growing boys in at least four years. I was grateful for the opportunity to see my friend even if it was just a day prior to his eternal transition.
I had a great first visit with my friend who was comfortable, but clearly in his last days on earth. Surprisingly, he could still recognize who I was and carry on clear conversation. Before I left his bedside, I asked. “Is there anything else I could do for you my friend?” He said, “Yes, bring me that boy.” I was like, “What boy?” He said, “Bring me that little boy.” I said, “Are you talking about my little baby Asher?” He said, “Yes.” I said, “He is not a little baby anymore. Last time you saw him he was not quite one years old, but he is now five. But, I’ll see what I can do.”
Honestly, I really just wanted to go crawl in my bed after a very long, hard day of seeing patients. But, I knew this man might not wake up the next day. So, I went home and asked my five year old son if he would go visit my friend. It was obvious he had no idea who I was even talking about since he was just born the last time we lived near each other. But, the promise of some Mexican Cheese Dip at least got him to jump in the car with me.
As we headed to the hospital he asked. “Is Mr Tommy a boy or girl.” I said, “A boy.” He asked, “Is Mr Tommy big like you or little like me? I said, “Big like me. Son, Mr Tommy is a Grandpa.” Finally, at least he had a mental picture of who he might be visiting. I told Asher that Mr Tommy just wanted to see him. That we needed to pray for Mr Tommy and let him know that Jesus loves him. He said, “Ok, daddy.”
We finally entered his hospital room and I really didn’t know what to expect. I wondered if Mr. Tommy really wanted to see my youngest son. Even more I wondered would my five year old be alright seeing a man struggling for his next breath. I decided I would leave that to God. I then observed a very moving scene.
A man who earlier stuggled to lift an eye lid was suddenly wide eyed. He lit up when my son entered the room as my five year old sought to let God use him. We bowed our heads together for prayer. My son, simply prayed, “Dear God, please help Mr Tommy feel better.” It was a short prayer and visit, but the divine connection was obvious.
After our visit, we headed to the Mexican Restaurant as promised. My five year old son said this on the way there. “That man was a Grandpa. I’m glad I could make that Grandpa happy.” He smiled and everything within me leaped. I knew he understood something that so many miss today. It really is more blessed to give than to receive. And, it doesn’t take much to encourage a soul and be someone’s answer to prayer.
The next afternoon, Mr Tommy drew his last breath this side of Heaven. He had faith in Jesus and he had made peace with the God who called him home. And, somehow in the last twenty four hours of his life God used a five year old boy to help with that process. My friends, it’s doesn’t matter where life finds you. Young or old, God can use you. The question is, “Are you willing to let him.” You don’t have to know all the answers to life’s situations. You simply need God’s love in your heart and a willing spirit to let that love flow through you. You make yourself totally available and I guarantee God will use you.
(1 John 4:7-8) Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
They Say Lightning Doesn’t Strike Twice…
Posted on September 24, 2015 Leave a Comment
Every generation has lessons and legends they pass on to the next. Like who ever discovered a rabbit’s foot brings good luck? Who ever decided it’s just not good luck to have a black cat cross your path? I hope it wasn’t the same people that said lightning doesn’t strike twice. Which is to say that the same bad thing won’t happen to the same person twice. Let me briefly put that last theory to rest for you.
Over the last five years alone, I’ve ministered to hundreds of hospice patients inside homes, hospitals, and skilled nursing facilities. For me, it’s never been a burden or just a job. I feel called by God to help people find God’s peace, comfort and hope even in the midst of great crisis. However, in just a brief moment my ability to do that drastically changed.
About two years ago, while trying to help a family process their grief a rather large lady passed out into my arms. I did the best I could to keep her from pounding the hard floor. Her body did the best it could to make it where I never walked again. I really thought I would just work through the pain. Six weeks later, I could barely take a few steps. MRI results showed that I had a muscle tear in my right side and a lower back bulge in my L3,L4, and L5 vertebrae.
It took quite a while to get back on my feet. After many months of physical therapy, pain shots, time and faith I finally got back to what I loved doing so much. I still had a little discomfort, but I had avoided surgery and was 85% stronger. You know, sometimes you have to know where you were to appreciate where you are.
Recently, I was out visiting several hospice patients inside a facility. I was feeling great and doing what I love so much. When all of sudden, my legs were literally knocked out from underneath me. Someone had spilled a trail of fluids that obviously I did not see before me. One young lady watched as this pastor flew about three feet in the air. I’m willing to bet I would have been a youtube sensation if there was video surveillance. I did everything I could to just keep from breaking my neck.
Praise God, I didn’t break my neck. However, it does appear that I struck more than one nerve in body. I was beyond sore the next day. As each day has passed the pressure in my legs has only gotten worse. Evidently, this time around I have done something that isn’t just going away tomorrow. It’s all I can do to stand on my legs while wearing knee pads and a back brace. And, honestly this time around I’m not feeling near as crazy inside.
First of all, let’s just say the heck with that lie that lightning doesn’t strike twice. The truth is, anything can happen on any given day. You and I have to find a way to work through and most importantly trust God to take us through whatever happens in life.
A few days after my injury, I was talking with a military veteran who had years of wear and tear on his body. From his wheelchair, he told me about all his falls. He told me how he fell out of a helicopter, broke his back and lived to tell about it. He said, “I’ve found in my years that time plus faith will always bring healing. You might not be as you once were, but you can always come out even stronger on the other side.”
Those words are healing to my heart and soul even now. Especially as I once again find myself on the trail of the unknown. I have no idea what tomorrow holds, but I do know who holds tomorrow. I know from my first time of being knocked down that God is faithful and will take me through even these days.
I pray that whatever you might be facing you know that God is there, God is bigger and God is still in control. And that sometimes God calms the storm, but He can always calm His child.
(Luke 8:24)”The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Master, Master, we’re going to drown!” He got up and rebuked the wind and the raging waters; the storm subsided, and all was calm.”
(James 1:2-4) “Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.
5 Things Your Pastor Needs You To Know
Posted on September 12, 2015 2 Comments
1. He Has A Boss.
Yep, I have someone I report to daily. My boss sees everything I do and even knows my motives while doing it. Scripture tells me that I need to focus on pleasing God, not man. I have to let God lead me as I seek to lead others. A pastor is called, not hired. At the end of this life we will all give an account to God for what we’ve done and not done. I’m hoping to hear those words, “Well done, thy good and faithful servant.”
2. He Has A Family.
Scripture tells pastors that we must manage our family before we seek to manage the family of God. It means so much when others recognize and value a pastor’s family. I have a wife that deserves more than left overs. I have four boys that need a dad who just happens to be a preacher. Try to love your pastor’s family as much as he loves yours. As one pastor friend once said to a church member. “You go to bed with just your family in mind. I go to bed with countless families on my mind.”
3. He Has Limits.
In 20 years of ministry my humanity has been revealed on more than a few occassions. I’ve concluded that pleasing everyone is not an option. Even on my best day I can’t be everywhere, I can’t do everything, and I can’t make everyone happy. Over time I’ve realized that prayer can take things much further than me. I have to maintain a balance of my time and keep myself healthy. If I don’t stay healthy, I won’t be helpful for long.
4. He Has Issues.
Maybe there is a pastor out that thinks he is perfect. Personally, I’m a hot mess covered by the grace of God. I lose my patience. I say things I wish I never did. I have bills I can’t pay. I run out of energy often and have to go to the doctor when I get sick. As one lady said to me, “I realize you put on your pants just like the rest of us.” Remember that the next time you expect your pastor to act like an Angel with wings.
5. His Job Is Much Bigger Than Him Alone.
Many in churches sit back and expect the pastor to do all the work. Any church totally dependent upon the pastor for everything is a church bound to fail. Every believer is a part of the body of Christ. We’ve all been called to minister, just in different ways. A pastor is only as strong as those who surround him. A healthy church is made up of a group of unselfish believers who take seriously God’s commands and mission in this life. Pastors should be held to a higher standard, but so should all who claim to be Christ followers.
*Join Pastor Craig @ Refuge Church where you can always come as you are, but never leave the same. Go to http://www.RefugeChurch.org for more information or to listen to messages that could help you in everyday life.
THANK YOU JESUS
Posted on August 31, 2015 Leave a Comment
Recently, I stopped to fill my car up with gas. I couldn’t believe the sign read $1.88. Inside my heart, I was doing the chicken dance. For whatever reason, this prompted me to consider many other blessings. In the gas station parking lot, I thanked God for giving me two jobs I love. I thanked God for a wife that has stood by my side for better or worse. I thanked God for not one, but four healthy boys I’m proud to call my sons. I thanked God for family, friends, and a world full of opportunity to carry out His will. I promise not to bore you with any further details.
I appreciate more than ever the words of an old hymn. “Count you blessings name them one by one. Count your blessings see what God has done.” From my viewpoint, God has done a whole lot. Often, we don’t take time to thank God for his endless grace, mercy, and undeserved blessings. My mind can easily drift to what is broken and needs to be fixed. Yet, if God never gave me one more thing in this life I would die rich!
Have you stopped to consider all God has done for you? Are you focused on your problems or your blessings? God wants us to give Him our problems and thank Him continually for the blessings. Prayer combined with thanksgiving will increase our joy and peace in life. Take out a piece of paper and list some of the ways God has blessed you. I guarantee most will run out of space to list them all.
(1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)”Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.”
My Love Story
Posted on August 25, 2015 Leave a Comment
Aimee and I just celebrated 18 years of marriage together. In celebration of that I would like to share our love story. Hope it encourages someone who is praying for that special someone.
We met in high school a few years after her family moved to Dorchester, South Carolina. We had just one class together and really only saw each other in passing. She was a cheer leader and I was on the football team.
After graduation, I came home the next fall to watch a high school football game. It was the begining of her junior year in High School and my first year in college. I still recall the day her beautiful smile totally captured my attention. It was as if God put a halo over her head and said, “Look here son.” One conversation led to another. Before I knew it we were talking for hours on the phone. I began looking for excuses for us to spend time together.
One of the biggest highlights of my life happened early in our relationship. After attending a youth bible study together we were hanging out together in my car. She said, “I think I’m ready to give my heart and life to Jesus Christ.” Right then and there, I led her through God’s plan of salvation. We bowed our heads together and she invited Jesus into her heart. She was already a wonderful person, but now she was totally changed forevermore. All because “God so loved the world that He gave His only son that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life.”(John 3:16)
This marked the begining of us getting on the same page. You see, I knew I couldn’t just marry anybody. The person I married had to know and love the same God I loved. The God who called me into the ministry had to be calling her too. I knew growing up a Pastor’s son that being a pastor would not be easy. I knew the Pastor’s wife had to be someone extra special.
We dated the next 4 plus years. She followed me to Charleston Southern University where we both attended classes. Just like any young relationship we went through many ups and downs. I still recall the day God made it crystal clear that I was to marry Aimee Lynn Perrin. I realized she was not just someone I could live with, but someone I could not live without.
I began the process of buying a diamond ring. Thank God my mom fronted me the money before I could pay her back. The night of our engagement we got a window seat at California Dreaming in Charleston, SC. She had no idea what was ahead or that I was even pondering popping the question. After purposely making her think that diamond rings were way too expensive, I pulled the ring out of my jacket pocket. Her smile made it worth every dollar spent.
Less than six months later we got married on August 23rd, 1997. Praise God, she said YES. Outside of saying yes to Jesus she became the second best yes of my life. I have never had a lonely day since.
We started our marriage together at just 20 and 22 years old. We were simply kids who thought they knew what they were doing. Fortunately, this was all part of God’s divine plan. He grew us, watched over us, and kept our marriage from falling apart for 18 years.
I thought I loved my wife years ago. But, time has proven that I’m just learning how to love and appreciate her. I thank God for answered and unanswered prayers. For sending me someone that not only completes my sentences, but loves me unconditionally. Someone who makes me better just by her presence.
Many just see her as the preacher’s wife. I see her as the half that makes me whole. The one God uses daily to help me accomplish His mission in this life. I can promise you this for sure, my life would not be the same without her. Aimee Crosby thanks for giving me room to grow, supporting my dreams, and never leaving my side. I pray we share many more years together!
Back To School Prayer
Posted on August 17, 2015 Leave a Comment
It’s that time of year again. When back packs, pencils, and notebooks are flying off the shelves. Kids and parents have to get used to being on school schedule after a possible lazy summer. This year we’ve got children headed to 11th grade, 9th grade, 6th grade, and Kindergarten. It will certainly take a tag team effort to get everyone to school on time. Oh, and my wife is telling me they even expect us to pick them back up.
Watching the way my wife prepares for these events is nothing short of amazing. Not to mention, her heart is aching watching her baby boy transition to all day school. I personally have very mixed feelings. Sure, I’m glad my boys are growing up and becoming all God created them to be. On the other hand, I feel like our time with them is slipping away so quickly. Maybe you have some of these feelings and more.
Earlier I found myself compelled to pray not only for my children, but all children. We all know the evil one is always looking to steal, kill, and destroy. We can’t be with them all the time. But, God can watch over them moment by moment. So, here is my school prayer.
Dear God, I come to you on behalf of our children. Please continue to grow them into the men and women you want them to become. Protect them from Satan’s attacks. Strengthen them where they feel weak. Assure them that no matter what you are with them. Guide their teachers and parents in the way they should go. May all work together as one. May no child be left behind. May every family have a blessed school year. May your will, not ours be done. In our homes, in our schools, and in this world. In Jesus name we pray, AMEN!
“Do not be anxious about anything. But, in everything by prayer and petition present your requests to God with Thanksgiving. And, then the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7
“It’s Such A Cute Church”
Posted on August 14, 2015 Leave a Comment
Recently, I over heard two adults talking about how sad it was that so few attended their church. The lady said with all sincerity, “And, it’s such a cute little church.” I’m sorry but I just couldn’t keep my mouth shut about a matter that is so dear to my heart. They both looked so perplexed over this matter. They just couldn’t understand why people don’t go to church anymore.
I felt like a kid in the classroom with his hand raised. I was just waiting on someone to ask “Do you know the answer?” I looked at them both and asked, “Can I say something about this matter. “Gone are the days that people just run to the church, but it is time for the church to run to them.”
Over a decade ago it was predicted that within the next 20 years the average church would be closed. One, because most realize that if it wasn’t for the senior adult population the doors would have already been closed. But, just as big as that fact is knowing that if churches don’t change their approach nothing much will change.
Many know I started a new church called Refuge because I realized that over 30,000 folks throughout Colleton County alone don’t attend church reguraly. Crazy to me is all the folks that assume we’re just changing our music and not meeting in a traditional church building. Trust me, if that’s all any church changes that will not be enough. Here are some things I’ve learned are critical to seeing different results.
1. BE REAL.
Nothing turns off people more than preaching one thing and then doing another. People must know you are just real people, with real problems, looking to a real Jesus for answers. The average unchurched person is not looking for another church club, but a place they can have a real encounter with an Almighty, All Loving, & All Knowing God. We’ve got to get out of God’s way and let him lead our churches. Not just the pastor, but every believer who makes up the Body of Christ.
2. BE COMPASSIONATE.
“People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Loving people on the outside of the church should be a greater concern than getting people on the inside of the church. Caring doesn’t have to cost a dime. It’s being there when life falls apart. It’s going the extra mile when you didn’t have to. It’s doing what you can, when you can to encourage another soul with God’s love. The church focused most on who they are keeping than who they are reaching is bound for decline. Jesus said,”I’ve not come for the well, but the sick.”
3. BE PATIENT.
Too many expect instant life change. Yet, that’s not how change takes place. It’s a process of understanding what it means to surrender all to Jesus. It’s a process of people loving you unconditionally and teaching you along the way. To help today’s culture you have to be willing to reach people on their front porch, get your hands dirty, and trust God with the life change. Our job as Christ followers is not to judge or produce results. We are called to be faithful, give God all the glory, and trust God with the growth.
“Some plant, some water, but God brings the growth.” (1 Corinthians 3:6)
I promise you this. You show me a church that sincerely cares about lost & broken people. You show me a church that is willing to do whatever it takes to reach those around them. You show me a church focused more on God’s agenda than their own. And, I will show you a church that will never stop growing!
*Local Pastor’s & Churches I sincerely pray for everyone of you. May we all keep our eyes on Jesus, do what Jesus did, and never grow weary in doing all we can to lead others to Jesus.
Carolina or Clemson, WHO CARES?
Posted on August 10, 2015 1 Comment
Recently, Clemson Tigers Head Football Coach Dabo Swinney lost his dad after a long battle with an ugly disease called cancer. I really was not aware of this family’s loss until I read the following facebook post from another die hard Gamecock fan.
She said, “..”Some may consider this treason, but that’s their problem. Tonight, my prayers are with Dabo Swinney,who lost his father this weekend. I know what it means to lose a father – he is the compass and the light that guides you! When we meet on the field, it’s all business, but tonight, the Gamecock nation needs to say a prayer for the Swinney family – I know I will!”
This post from a friend not only moved my heart, but the hearts of several other Gamecock fans. Bigger than just some moving words it began to build a bridge. A bridge between two fan bases that love to watch football, but must understand deep down it’s just a game.
It’s amazing how it often takes crisis for us to put things in proper perspective. Consider all the good that has come from such a horrific act inside a Charleston AME Church. Many observed as that single event not only unified a city, state, and in many ways a nation.
Before we know it football will be back in full swing. I’m sure the Carolina vs Clemson rivalry will be as intense as ever. But, please don’t let your love of football get out of hand. Remember that people will always matter more than scoreboards. Even if somebody doesn’t play on your team they still matter deeply to God.
Jesus said, “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you.” (John 15:11)
Dabo Swinney and family you’re all in our prayers at this time! Why? Because some things are just way more important than any football game!
Come Near And I Will Shoot Myself
Posted on August 10, 2015 Leave a Comment
I’ll never forget a man who just found out his wife of several years was leaving him for another man. He was devastated to say the least. His emotions really got the best of him. He made threats he didn’t mean and did things he would never do in his right mind.
Things got so bad that cops were on the ground and helicopters were in the air searching for him. He was considered armed and dangerous. But, I knew deep down he just felt scared and hopeless.
During this all out man hunt, my phone rang. To my surprise it was this devastated man. He said, “Craig, I’m about to end it all. And, if anyone comes near I will shoot myself. I don’t have anything left to live for anyway!”
We exchanged many words. But, then God prompted me to ask the following. I said, “My friend what about those boys of yours? They would be heartbroken if you left them so early in their lives.” I said, “Do you have your wallet with you?” He said, “Yes, Why?” I said, “Open up your wallet and see if you have any pictures of your boys.”
Next thing I know I’m hearing nothing but a grown man weeping. You see, he was looking at a picture of his youngest son. He realized at that moment that he still had a purpose to exist. He was then driven to live another day and hold on for another moment.
He would soon agree to meet me and some officers for his arrest. Today, those boys still have their loving father as part of their life. All because a man realized a purpose to live in the midst of his darkest hour.
Purpose is a powerful thing. It gives us a reason to wake up each day. When it comes to our God-given purpose it’s not something we create, but we discover. God’s purpose and plans always trump our best ideas. We simply need to seek God’s will with all our heart and soul. God will reveal His plans for your life through His word, His spirit, other people, and even life circumstances. I pray you settle for nothing less than God’s best.
(Ephesians 2:10)(NIV)For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
(Proverbs 19:21)(NIV)Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.
Join Pastor Craig any Sunday 9:15am or 11am @ the Colleton Rec Center. Find out more about his church and listen to his sermons by going to www.RefugeChurch.org.
I QUIT TRYING
Posted on July 27, 2015 Leave a Comment
Ever just not know what to say? Ever reach your limit of heartache? Ever realize that you just can’t handle anything else? I personally have reached the end of myself. In fact, the only thing I’m certain of right now is there is a God and I’m not him.
I’m surrounded by things I can’t explain or understand. I’ve observed firsthand more crisis in the past month alone than most will observe in a lifetime. I have to admit that it has me wondering what will happen next. Sadly, I’m not even surprised anymore when my phone rings telling me another unthinkable thing has happened.
You see, for the past twenty years of ministry I’ve been one of those guys accustomed to playing rescue ranger. You know, I’ll show up at your house and just fix everything. Honestly, I finally met my match enough times that I’ve quit trying.
No, I’ve not given up on God’s goodness or greatness. No, I’ve not quit trying to do anything I can to help someone in need. But, I have quit trying to play God in anyone’s life. This has been liberting to say the least.
You see, we all have to know where we end and God begins. We all need to know our limits and how to turn things over to a God who has no limits. I’m learning that processing things to death only causes me more griefs. I got tired of pretending like I could fix things that were way beyond me. So, I just gave everything over to God.
Yes, I’m letting go and letting God. In the midst of a recent heart wrenching crisis, I just kept saying “You take it God, this is way too big for me. Accomplish what you want through this situation. I don’t understand it, but you do. I have no control over anything, but you have control over everything.”
I really do believe we have to reach the end of ourselves before we will truly surrender everything into God’s hands. Well, I’ve reached the end of me and I’ve decided I will no longer try to play God. What peace I’ve found in giving God everything and everyone that used to weigh so heavily on my heart.
(Matthew 11:28-30) Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
*Join Pastor Craig Sundays 9:15am or 11am @ the Colleton Rec Center. At Refuge Church you can always “Come As You Are, But Never Expect To Leave The Same.”
Be All That YOU Can Be
Posted on July 23, 2015 Leave a Comment
I’ll never forget the words of a fellow pastor early in my ministry. He said, “Craig, you don’t have to be Billy Graham. Just be the best you that God created you to be.” It took a few years to really understand that statement, but no truer words have never been spoken.
Too often we try to be someone we were never meant to be. Policies and principles can be duplicated, but every person is uniquely hand crafted by God. It’s important to discover who you are and how God has wired you to function. Your strengths and weaknesses are things God plans to use for His glory.
Six months ago, I started working with a great company called Patriot Hospice. Because of my passion for hospice, I started out as their Community Liasion. My job was to help connect those who need hospice with a company they can trust to care for them and their loved ones. I still got to interact with families and patients, but most of my job was getting out in the community.
God used those six months to make me realize that I’m called to be by the bedside of patients, not just discover patients. You see, I’ve spent over six years as a hospice chaplain in the past. During that time I’ve helped hundreds make their eternal transition. I find great joy in helping the dying find God’s peace, comfort, and hope in their greatest valley.
I’ve now transitioned back to being the full time chaplain of Patriot Hospice. After just two weeks of being by many bedsides, I feel back where I belong. I’m not doing less work, but I’m doing the work God created me to do. Any time you’re doing something that is a God fit it really doesn’t feel like work. It may require work, but you know that God has called you to the mission at hand.
Maybe you’re struggling because you’re trying to be someone God has not called you to be. Take time to seek God’s face and God’s will. A big part of discovering God’s will for your life is eliminating what is not. Write out what you believe should be your life mission statement. Then make sure you take that life mission wherever you go in this life. Nothing you do should ever change who God made you to be. Instead, wherever you go, BE ALL THAT GOD CREATED YOU TO BE.
(Romans 12:6)”We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us.”
(1 Peter 4:10) “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.
(1 Corinthians 10:31) “whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.”
(Jeremiah 29:11) “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
*If you don’t have a church home you can join Pastor Craig @ Refuge Church of Walteboro. Sundays 9:15am or 11am @ the Colleton Rec Center you can discover God’s will for your life. Come as you are, but never plan to leave the same.
Flag Up, Flag Down: WHO CARES?
Posted on July 11, 2015 3 Comments
I typically stay away from hot topics, politics and cultural wars. But, I actually believe the lowering of a Confederate Flag has opened a huge window. A window to speak truth into the hearts of all who will listen. Here are some things I feel led to share to anyone who might listen.
1. IT’S JUST A FLAG.
Yes, that flag like many things in our society has become a very important tradition to many. I totally get why some people feel that part of their historical heritage has been removed. But, has it really? Lowering a flag doesn’t change history or heritage. That flag is just a symbol that no longer flies at our state capital.
2. PEOPLE MATTER MOST.
I believe most of us deep down agree with this one. At the end of the day people are more valuable than any old flag. I know, that flag represents people that you feel should be remembered for their sacrifice. But, for many others that flag has made them remember days they wish they could soon forget. If removing a flag can help in even a small way with our state’s racial divide, I say bring it down. People will always matter more to God than any old flag ever will.
3. IS IT REALLY THAT BIG OF DEAL?
At the end of a very emotional South Carolina day when that flag was lowered, I posted the following as my Facebook status. “Just a few reasons I’ve not had time to grieve over a flag. Today alone I’ve visited with 3 people battling cancer, one man completely paralyzed, one lady near death, and counseled a lady grieving the loss of her daughter. This floods my daily perspective.”
Too often, we are so focused on secondary things they we totally miss the primary things that matter most to God. Loving God, Loving people, and sharing Jesus with a lost world is what tops God’s list. There is no debating that we live in a very broken world and society. I sincerely pray we might all be more passionate about God’s will than we are any old flag or tradition.
5 Ingredients For A Great Family Vacation
Posted on July 9, 2015 Leave a Comment
Aimee & The Boys -Vacation 7-9-15
Just got back from a week long vacation with the family. This year we rented a lake house with a great view of Lake Murray. Vacation has always been a really big priority for my family and my sanity. We’ve been on a lot of trips over the years, but this year’s getaway was the best ever. Yes, even compared to Disney World. Here are a few things that we’ve found makes for a great vacation:
1. Consider A Place Everyone Enjoys.
There is no one size fits all, but it’s always good when you can consider the interests of everyone. My five year old lived in the pool. My 11 year old loved the video games. My 13 year old fished day and night. My 15 year old, enjoyed the hot tub and having his own room to unwind. My wife enjoyed time together and especially seeing smiles on every face. A place doesn’t have to be perfect to be a great vacation location.
2. Make Sure You Get AWAY.
I’m sure my phone rang over 25 times thoughout the week. However, I only returned two phone calls in response to true emergencies. If your trip doesn’t get you away from most daily stress and demand it will likely be a waste of money. Personally, I’m not a big fan of staying home for vacation since my profession is always in demand.
3. Create Quality Moments Together.
I purposely took time with each of my four boys during vacation. Sadly, they don’t always get my undivided attention back home, but they do on a bass boat. Play games and eat together. Look for moments to share deep thoughts, express your love, and listen to the heartbeat of each family member.
4. Relax And Take It Easy.
One of my favorite parts was knowing that I could just breathe in and out. I could sleep in late. I could stay up late. My greatest stress was deciding what I felt like eating for breakfast, lunch or dinner. I’ve concluded that it’s better to take a week away than just a few days when possible. For me, it takes a few days to even remember how to unplug and unwind.
5. Get Feedback From Everyone.
How can you continue to improve anything without feedback. Our last night together we all got in the outdoor hot tub. We went around the circle and gave each person the opportunity to tell us three things. One, what did you enjoy most? Two, what was your most memorable moment? Three, what was your favorite meal? These may sound like small questions, but they can lead to greater understanding of each other. You might be surprised what really stood out to someone.
(Mark 6:30-32)(NLT)30 The apostles returned to Jesus from their ministry tour and told him all they had done and taught. 31 Then Jesus said, “Let’s go off by ourselves to a quiet place and rest awhile.” He said this because there were so many people coming and going that Jesus and his apostles didn’t even have time to eat. 32 So they left by boat for a quiet place, where they could be alone.
*Craig Crosby is the Chaplain for Patriot Hospice. He is also the lead pastor of Refuge Church which holds weekly services Sundays 9:15am & 11am @ the Colleton Rec Center.
More Than A Catfish
Posted on June 22, 2015 Leave a Comment
This past Father’s Day was one of the best I can remember. After worship that Sunday, I took my two oldest boys fishing. God has blessed me with a house full of boys ages 15, 13, 11, and 5 years old. Of course, there are few dull moments at our house, but I wouldn’t trade one of them.
Honestly, most of our fishing trip didn’t bring much luck. Yet we joked, laughed and smiled the entire time we were together. Lately, I’ve been able to see that my boys just want me to be there for them. More importantly, to make time for them.
My boys have seen firsthand for years that someone is always begging for my attention. And just like their mom, they don’t mind sharing me with someone really in need. But at the end of the day they don’t just need a preacher. They need what every child needs, someone who really loves them.
As I watch them grow up way too fast, I’ve decided I won’t waste another moment. I will make time with each of them with no apologizes to others. My first ministry will always be my family. God gave them to me and I need to do my best to enjoy and lead them.
As I looked into their faces, I saw boys that were just happy to be with their dad. It didn’t even matter if we caught a fish. What did matter was that whatever we did, we did it together.
As dark drew near our fishing trip was about over. And, all we had to show for it were two little bream my oldest caught with some crickets. Suddenly, one of my catfish rods on the dock began to bend. I picked up my reel and thought I must have a huge turtle.
I fought for nearly 20 minutes to see what was on the other side of that line. Then, I realized I would never get this big fish to shore without some major intervention. Thank God a nearby man in a boat came to my rescue. He reached down into that water like the guys you see on television and grabbed that monster. This professional fishing guide said the catfish was easily 30-35 lbs.
Now, I must admit that catching that big fish was exciting, but nothing compared to the quality time and fellowship I had with my growing boys. I may never catch another fish that size, but I sure do look forward to my next adventure with those boys. As Trace Atkins says in his song, “…and they thought we were just fishing.”
(Ephesians 5:16)(NLT) “Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days.”
DEAR STRANGER, I’M SO SORRY
Posted on June 20, 2015 Leave a Comment
I was raised in the south where no one can argue that putting racism behind us has been quite a journey. Also, looking back in history no one can argue that progress has been made in this area. Maybe I’m just strange, but the recent shooting at the Emmanuel AME Church in Charleston, SC has compelled me to express my deepest apology to many total strangers. Please allow me to explain.
No doubt, many hearts are heavy after a mentally disturbed white male opened fire and killed 9 precious souls. Now, God saw no color as he looked down on this event. But let’s be honest, most Americans were not as color blind. Due to media venues stirring racial tension, this event has deceived many into thinking we are still a world divided by the color of our skin.
Yes, there is still much that can improve when it comes to human equality and race relations. But, I’m in no way convinced that what that sick young man did reflects the majority of white Americans. In the same way, I’m convinced that just because a small percentage of black Americans commit crimes doesn’t mean their actions reflect the majority.
For example, a great church could have a few members that don’t reflect Christ in their everyday lives. Some great businesses could have a few employees that don’t refect their overall integrity. And someone raised in the best of families could do something that makes everyone in that family look bad. Does it mean that entire church, business, or family is terrible?
Well, this is not a time for debate. It is a time to pray for and love one another even deeper. I found myself just 24 hours after this mass church shooting approaching random African Americans. Keep in mind, none of them had I even seen before. Many I hugged. I told them that I was so sorry for what occurred in that church. I so much wanted them to know that most white Americans don’t think this way.
One black man, shed tears after our elevator ride together. All I did was give him a big hug. Then, I told him and his two boys that I was deeply sorry for what this young, sick man had done. I wanted him to know He was my brother in Christ and constantly in my prayers. You see, this man knew personally many who were a part of this church fellowship and all I could say was “I’m so sorry”.
I hate what happened. But I’ve already seen so much good come out of such a terrible situation. How moving are the pictures and video of black and white worshipping hand in hand. I believe this is a reflection of Heaven to come. In Heaven, there will be no color, no church denominations, no fights and no more heartache. There will only be souls that all said yes to Jesus praising God together forever and ever.
Revelation 21: 3-4 says, “He will live with them, and they will be his people. God himself will be with them. He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.”
4 Reasons To Quit Your Job
Posted on June 16, 2015 Leave a Comment
I believe our life decisions should always be under review. We need to often evaluate our priorities, movtives, and even progress. Otherwise, we’re likely headed down a dead end road if we simply go with the flow of society. Here are four reasons you might need to quit your job.
#1 IT’S KILLING YOU.
Health is one of the most underrated things in our society. Anything that kills you physically, emotionally, mentally, and for sure spiritually is not good. You should definitely consider a different approach and greater balance. Maybe you’re just over doing it and have to realize you aren’t as young as you used to be. Or, maybe the job you’re working just isn’t worth the toll it’s having on your health. Don’t tell me you’re killing yourself for your family. I’m pretty sure your family would rather have you around longer healthy and happy. The wrong job over time could lead to an earlier grave.
#2 YOU CAN’T DO IT ALL.
Sometimes you reach a point where something on your plate just has to go. Many pride themselves in working day and night. Listen, you can always make another dollar, but you can’t buy back another minute of life. You have to establish order in your life. A great place to start is making sure your faith and family are headed in the right direction. Everything else should flow out of the positioning of these things called priorities. Often, we have to say no to one thing in order to say a stronger yes to another. Too many people just fill up their calendars and then quickly find themselves burnout and bummed out. Sometimes a job works on paper, but it just doesn’t work in real life.
#3 YOUR HEART IS NOT IN IT.
Anyone in a care position such as nursing, teaching, or pastoring knows your heart matters. Any job that involves caring for others demands calling and heart. You have to feel compelled by God above all else to do certain things effectively. Your heart has to be in certain things to really do the job at hand. Sometimes we just need a break, but sometimes we need a career change because we know our heart is no longer in what we’re doing.
#4 IT’S NOT GOD’S WILL.
If everything within you says what you’re doing is not pleasing to God, there is nothing else to discuss. God certainly doesn’t want you to do anything illegal or that contradicts His Word (The Bible). No amount of money is worth doing something that you know is wrong. No amount of money can subsitute for a clear conscience before God. Knowingly staying on the wrong path will take you places you never wanted to go and cost you way more than you ever wanted to give up. After all, that is actually the definition of sin.
(James 4:17) If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them.
*Pastor Craig is the lead pastor at Refuge Church. Where you can always come as you are, but never leave the same. Services are Sundays 9:15am & 11am @ the Colleton Rec Center. Check it out http://www.RefugeChurch.org
What Cancer Couldn’t Take (A Tribute To Julie Smoak)
Posted on June 13, 2015 Leave a Comment
Several months ago, I had a private conversation with Julie Smoak on one of her many stays at Trident Hospital. Julie was of very clear mind and heart at that time. She said, “Craig, if I had time, I would write a book about what God has shown me through this time.” I promised her that when I finally wrote a book that God has been birthing in me for some time called, “By The Bedside”, I would make sure she has her own chapter.
Occasionally, you run into someone ordinary, who chooses to allow God to do through them the extraordinary. Julie was one of those people. Someone you just felt blessed to know. Someone who left you knowing God is great, God is good and God is love.
I recall like yesterday Julie walking into my church office and telling me those words we all hate to hear, “Yes, I’ve got cancer.” Having lost in the past to cancer an Aunt that was just 30 and an Uncle that was just 44, I was very familiar with this battle. At the time of Julie’s diagnosis, she was just 36 years old. Her daughter Sarah was only 7. Her husband Charles was my associate pastor and still is a dear friend.
Keep in mind, Julie and Charles were not just two people I met later in life. We grew up in the same community and attended for a season the same church my dad used to pastor. One summer, Julie and I actually rode to and from summer school together. I think we both wished we had tried a little harder in Algebra that year.
Many observed Julie’s long, hard fought battle with cancer. No doubt, God was with her day and night. He carried her when otherwise she couldn’t carry on. Family and friends were by her side and never quit loving her. They continued praying God’s ultimate healing for her. Selfishly, we would all have loved for her healing to have taken place this side of Heaven. But God had different plans.
Over the past few years, God performed many miracles in Julie’s life. She defeated the odds so many times. When it looked like she would be leaving us, we all gathered to say goodbye. God showed up, and showed us His ability to overcome anything. Doctors and bystanders couldn’t help but say, “There goes that miracle girl again.” Julie just kept bouncing back even when there were no medical explanations.
Now, I would never say cancer took Julie from us. It did present challenges and viciously attacked her body. But the only reason Julie left us was that it was her time. Her mission on earth was complete after just 41 brief years. Death is always an appointment. In God’s eyes there are no accidents. Nothing takes Him by surprise, nor will it ever.
While she was sleeping peacefully beside her husband Charles, God said, “Julie my child, it’s time. Your work on earth is done, your mission is complete and your ultimate healing has come. You will now be in Heaven with me. Where cancer, tears, pain, or heartache will never threaten you again.” Julie taught us with God’s help we can weather any storm. She showed us what cancer can’t take away from the believer who trusts Jesus as their Savior and Lord. Here are three things Julie never lost during her battle with cancer and never will:
1. Cancer never stole her FAITH.
With a huge smile on her face, she knew more than ever that God was with her. She discovered that closeness with God that can only be found in the midst of a deep valley. Her faith grew, her peace increased and her light was brighter than ever for all to see. She did what many only dream of. “She fought the good fight, kept the faith, and finished her race.” Her great faith was on clear display for all to see.
2. Cancer never stole her HOPE.
Cancer may have taken her strength, changed her plans, but it never stole her hope. Years before Julie had trusted Jesus as her Savior. But in the last years of her life, there was no doubt Jesus was her Lord. You see, our hope in Christ has nothing to do with our circumstances. Hope comes with our faith in Jesus colliding with God’s grace. Julie knew whose she was in Christ and where she was headed when this life came to end.
She knew as a believer that “To be absent from the body, is to be present with the Lord.” Julie is now not only cancer free, but living in a place of eternal hope.
(1 John 5:13)I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life.
Julie’s hope is no longer in the future, but she is experiencing it in the present.
3. Cancer never stole God’s LOVE.
Illness does not mean God has turned his back on us or doesn’t love us anymore. It’s through the illness we discover that God’s love is all that is guaranteed. Julie loved those around her deeply and unconditionally. For most of her cancer battle, Julie continued to work at Williams Memorial Elementary school. She poured her heart out for others even while taking treatments and enduring great hardships. What others call ministry, Julie simply called “love”.
Julie loved many and many loved Julie. She was full of God’s love and carried by God’s love to her eternal home. Fortunately, Julie left this earth holding onto things that matter most in this life and the life to come.
(1 Corinthians 13:13(NLT) Three things will last forever–faith, hope, and love–and the greatest of these is love.
Yes, Julie Smoak battled plenty in her brief time on this earth. She had 4 different chemotherapy treatments weekly totaling over a years worth. She had 3 different radiation treatments daily that total over two months. Yet, through all the storms she learned that God is faithful. God is always with us. And God does some of His greatest work in the midst of crisis. Because when we are weak, He is strong. And now she knows it all happened for God’s glory.
None of us know what tomorrow will bring, but we do know who holds tomorrow. May we all hold on to the things that matter most just like Julie. Because in the end, only three things will remain. Faith, Hope, & Love.
Getting Up With The Sun
Posted on June 13, 2015 Leave a Comment
A Picture Took That Morning
As I write this, I’m literally sitting at a Myrtle Beach pier just an hour prior to daylight. All I hear are waves crashing. All I feel is a cool morning breeze that reminds me God is always is still awake.
It’s been quite awhile since I’ve actually watched the sunrise. I’m certainly not a morning person. Meaning, unless I set my alarm clock I will never naturally enjoy getting out of my warm, comfy bed before daylight. But, I know from past experience that waking early can be the biggest blessing.
(Luke 4:42) says, “At daybreak, Jesus went out to a solitary place.”
(Luke 5:16) says, “Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.”
I believe Jesus started each day on his knees. Before his busy day got underway. Before He faced the challenges before him. He humbled himself before his Heavenly Father. He prayed “Father not mine, but your will be done.”
Now, I’ve never read in scripture a command that says we have to rise early in the morning to pray. But, based on firsthand experience and research I would say it doesn’t sound like a bad idea. Every believer should at consider starting each day on their knees.
Only once in my past did I seek to experience forty days of sunrise with God. It was tough and often inconvenient. Yet, I remember well how much closer I felt to God. Especially when my only motivation was hoping to hear God’s voice and encounter His presence.
(Jeremiah 29:13)”You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”
Maybe God is calling you to come closer. To set aside the first part of your day seeking His heart, will, strength, and peace. I know many who will rise early to go hunting, fishing, or to go on some other adventure. Why not rise early to draw closer to the God who knit you together in your mother’s womb.
(James 4:8) “Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”
Are You Pastor At That New Church?
Posted on June 7, 2015 Leave a Comment
I’ve had this asked more than a few times. “So, you’re pastor of that new church?” My response, “No, we’re actually pretty old school. We just looked back at the Book of Acts and copied the early church. They worked together, operated unselfishly, and did everything they could to reach as many souls as possible.”
Over two years ago, my wife and I prayerfully started a new church in Colleton County called Refuge. This church is not designed to compete with other churches. Instead, it was started to reach the countless number of unchurched and lost throughout our county. Research revealed to me that nearly 75% of Colleton County alone was unchurched. That’s nearly 30,000 folks that are not connected to any local church.
Too many folks living in the southeast assume that most people around them go to church. When in reality, church attendance has been on the decline for quite some time. God put it on my heart to do everything possible to change that. So, we started a church that exists to change the way people think about church. We do this by removing many of the barriers that keep many unchurched.
One, we don’t expect the unchurched to run to us, so we run to them. We look for windows to show God’s love. Why? Because people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. We aim to love people with no strings attached on the outside and then invite them to join us on the inside.
Two, we create genuine environments where everyone feels loved. There is nothing worse than showing up at God’s house and feeling like you’re on the outside looking in. God never called us to start country clubs. He has called every church and believer to love their neighbor as themselves. Love is more than words, but its doing everything you can to make someone feel important. Trust me, people know when they don’t matter.
Three, we simply do church differently in hopes of reaching as many souls as possible. It takes nearly 20 volunteers a month just to provide ministry to our birth to fifth graders during our two Sunday worship services. We can’t expect young families to come if all we do is cater to old folks. We make sure hot coffee, water, and refreshments are waiting for all who attend. Who knows, not being able to get breakfast beforehand may just keep someone from seeing us. We’ve actually never passed around an offering plate. Why? Because we don’t want anyone letting a dollar bill keep them from walking into God’s house. Our dress is casual, our music is contemporary and our messages connect with people’s everyday lives. We’re not inviting people to just come to church, we’re inviting them to a worship experience that we believe will be life changing.
Finally, we are a church family. Growing up a preacher’s son I’ve learned that it’s critical we maintain unity, operate with a clear vision and bring people together for a greater mission. All of our people are challenged weekly to “Love, Lift, & Lead” people to Jesus. I tell them there should not be a day that goes by they don’t tells others what God is doing in their life and in their church.
Now, I’m not saying that dealing with people is easy, but reaching out to people is a pretty simple process. You simply love them as they are, lift Jesus in all you do, and leave the results to God. This past Sunday we baptized 24 folks who were previously unchurched. As I pondered their journey I was reminded that people reach people. Many who were getting baptized led others to Jesus that were getting baptized that same day as a result.
My friends, I believe ministry is easier than it’s ever been. The needs are great, people are hurting and God is still in the business of changing lives. Let’s make sure we’re all doing our part to love, lift, and lead others to Jesus. Because when we’re not, somebody is going unreached. It could be your neighbors, friends, or family.
COLLETON COUNTY: A Great Place To Love
Posted on June 6, 2015 Leave a Comment
Unlike some of you, I’ve not lived here all my life. I did however grow up in a small town called St. George, where everyone literally does know your name. Before God moved my family to Walterboro, I really wasn’t sure what it would be like to live in Colleton County. Yet, as each day passes my love only grows for the people in this area.
I’m sure being a pastor and hospice chaplain to so many has only accelerated my getting to know this community. Not to mention my four boys have attended 4 of the 5 public schools in Walterboro. I can’t say enough about the experiences my family has had over the past four years. I love the schools, teachers, community events, recreation activities, coaches, parks and a place that just feels like home. Most of all, I’ve really fallen in love with the people that make up this county.
I know there are many that still live wrecklessly and carelessly. But, overall, I’ve been impressed by the heartbeat of this county. Many people here really do care and love each other. When someone local is going through a tough time, many will do whatever they can to lend a helping hand.
This past week, tragedy hit several local families. Seemed like every other day someone was being air lifted to MUSC in Charleston. On one of my visits there, I was surprised to hear what one man said at the MUSC information counter. He said, “Most of the visitors we’ve seen lately have all come from the Walterboro area.” I couldn’t help but smile because I knew that reflected many of the hearts I know in Colleton County.
Yes, I know there is much work to be done in this community and there are many areas that need improvement. But I’m proud to live here. A place where people really do care about each other. A place where we understand it’s not about how much money you have in your pocket, but the amount of love in your heart.
So, let’s all continue to do our part in carrying out one of the greatest commandments given to us by Jesus. Because as I tell the folks at Refuge Church often, people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you.” (John 15:12)
Dear Child: Have Your Forgotten?
Posted on May 20, 2015 Leave a Comment
What a journey it has been since “I knit you together in your mother’s womb.” I’ve watched you grow each day. Sure there were times you wondered how things would work out. Yet, how could you ever deny or forget my faithfulness.
Never once have you had to worry about where you would live, what you would eat, or how your bills would be paid. Even when you thought things were about to fall apart, I always saved the day. I’m the one that holds you together, your marriage, and your family. I’ve always taken care of every detail of your life.
I bet many of your adult mentors wondered how you would become much of anything. After all, you could never sit still and never appeared to be taking anything seriously. Yet, I was using everyone and every circumstance in your life to shape and mold you into the person I created you to be.
Even now, I supply your strength, wisdom, and passion. I’ve done amazing things despite you, around you, and through you. Knowing that I’ve never failed you should compel you to keep trusting my divine plan. Just keep going where I tell you to go and doing what I tell you to do.
Your entire life you’ve tried to figure everything out. Haven’t you realized that my ways are higher and my shoulders are broader. Jump on my back, take up your cross, and continue to follow me. You think you’ve seen it all, but I’ve got even greater things in store for you.
Promise me this my child. That no matter where I lead you’ll never forget. I will always take care of you, always be with you, and never forsake you in your many times of need. Remember to give me all the glory for all the great things I’ve done, I’m doing, and will do.
Love,
Your Heavenly Father Who Loves You More Than Words
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11)(NIV)
Sky Diving Should Not Top Your Bucket List
Posted on May 19, 2015 Leave a Comment
Many know the lyrics by heart of Tim McGraw’s famous song “Live Like You’re Dying.” You know where he says “I went sky diving, rocky mountain climbing, I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu. I’m sorry, but if I just found out that I had only months left to live none of those things would top my bucket list.
In defense of a great song, I do think the rest of the lyrics are well worth topping anyone’s bucket list. McGraw says, “And I loved deeper, And I spoke sweeter, And I gave forgiveness I’ve been denying, And he said someday I hope you get the chance, To live like you were dying.”
“He said I was finally the husband, That most the time I wasn’t. And I became a friend a friend would like to have. And all the sudden going fishing, Wasn’t such an imposition. And I went three times that year I lost my dad.Well I finally read the good book, And I took a good long hard look at what I’d do If I could do it all again. And then.”
I’ve been by the bedside of hundreds of dying men and women. I’ve been there when they first discoverd the news. I’ve watched how knowing they were dying radically changed the way they viewed and lived life. In fact, being around those folks has dramitically changed my own life perspective and approach.
Honestly, we’re all just one step closer to the grave. Our days on earth are numbered, short, and uncertain. “Yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not promised, and today is a gift. That’s why they call it he present.” I have no idea how you might be living your life. But, I hope you’re living like you’re dying. This is done best by focusing on things that don’t just matter in this life, but in the life to come. Focusing not on the temporary, but the eternal. Seeking not our will, but God’s will.
” Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogant schemes. All such boasting is evil. If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them. (James 4:13-17)(NIV)
More Than A Pack Of Cigarettes
Posted on May 13, 2015 5 Comments
Countless folks have already been touched by her story. I’m praying that you might become another soul on that list. I am hoping to pay tribute to the life of Sharon Horne. A lady who fought a long, courageous battle with cancer. She requested I preach her funeral back in September 2014 at St. George Indian Field United Methodist Camp Meeting. I told her the only thing that could stop me was God calling me eternally home first.
Years ago, my dad was her Pastor. She literally watched me grow up as a child. Later I would become her pastor as she made her way to the first church I started in St. George. Then in February 2015, we would once again unite as I found my way by her dying bedside.
I assured Sharon we would walk together through this valley called death. She assured me that she had made peace with God and was not afraid to face death head on. She struggled way more with giving up her independence and leaving behind so many she loved.
Her journey before cancer was not easy. She was no stranger to heartache, struggles, pain and many days of depression. Yet the word quit was never in her vocabulary, even up to her dying day. She certainly looked forward to transitioning to a place where “there will be no more pain, sorrow or heartache. For the old order of things will have passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)
Sharon was a courageous person and a “tell you as she saw it” soul. Her heart was full of God’s grace of which she gratefully embraced herself. She knew apart from God’s grace and her faith in Jesus Christ alone she had no hope, but with Him a brighter tomorrow did await.
Very shortly after the doctor said, “Sharon you have cancer”, God’s peace swept over her and she learned to cling to her faith like never before. I said, “Sharon, when it’s all you have left it means more than ever, doesn’t it?” She said, “You better believe it.”
Cancer began to speak loudly through her increased pains and limitations that she was dying. Sharon had an increased desire to allow God to use her story to touch others. One Easter Sunday at Refuge Church in front of many she shared her heartfelt testimony. After just a few days of her message being posted online, Sharon’s testimony was listened to by a few thousand.
When I told Sharon we even created a video clip of her speaking she was all smiles. She said, “I’m famous. I’m famous.” She was tickled to death that God was using the toughest, most challenging time of her life to draw people unto Himself.
She and I had a very special relationship. We always knew God had connected our paths for reasons even beyond our comprehension. Sharon was the only person ever that compelled this Pastor to buy a pack of cigarettes.
A few months before her eternal transition, I was about to leave her house. I asked, “Sharon, is there anything else I could possibly do for you my friend before I leave?” She laughed and said, “Yes, go buy me a pack of cigarettes.” I said, “Yeah, right.” And I made my way back towards Walterboro.
But before I even got out of St. George, I stopped at the nearest gas station. At 40 years of age, I bought my first ever pack of cigarrettes. I was praying hard my mom wasn’t shopping that day. As I came back to her house to give her the cigarettes, I’ll never forget her response.
Sharon looked at me with tears rolling down her face. Hugged my neck tighter than ever and said. “Preacher, these cigarettes mean as much as any prayer you’ve ever uttered for me.” I ask, “Why?” She said, “Because now I know that your love for me has no bounds.” Those words have stuck with me ever since.
I told her, “God doesn’t look at the cigarette in your hand. He looks much deeper than that. He looks straight to your heart.” I know many might not agree with what I did, but I felt God’s approval and that was all that mattered.
Sharon Horne taught us all so much even through great suffering and adversity. She taught us how to love unconditionally. She taught us how to fight even when you don’t feel like it. She taught us how to stare death in the face with great hope knowing that in the end Jesus will save the day.
Sharon will be deeply missed. But there is no doubt in my mind where she now resides. Where she is now, there is no longer need for anti-anxiety pills, pain meds, or even a cigarette. She is now reunited with other believers who’ve gone on before her. Sharon is now smiling ear to ear, walking around with no limiations and praising God for His amazing grace that saved a wretch like her. For once she was lost and suffering. Now she is safe, sound and healthy forevermore.
Just Hours From Eternity
Posted on May 8, 2015 Leave a Comment
I’ve had it happen on more than a few occasions. Someone will call me and just simply ask, “Can you help me find peace with God?” But, this time was more than urgent as the other person on the phone knew she only had hours left this side of eternity.
The nurse had just informed this young lady that based on clear signs this just recently admitted hospice patient would not make it through the night. It was well after midnight and I was driving as quickly as I could in route to her house. Yet, there was no promise that she would still be breathing when I got there.
Still able to hear and talk clearly this lady requested to talk with me by phone. She said, “I know I’m about to die, but I have no idea where I’ll spend eternity.” I let her know that even though I could not stop the dying process, I could share with her the keys to eternity in Heaven. I could tell she was literally hanging on every word I could share.
I let her know we’re all sinners (Romans 3:23). And, that our sin is what separates us from a Holy God and eternity in Heaven (Romans 6:23). She asked, “What can I do about this?” I said, You can’t do anything for yourself, but you can accept what Jesus has already done on your behalf.
You see, God sent Jesus to die on a cross for your sins. Through Christ alone you can be forgiven, you can find peace, and you can be confident that you will spend eternity in Heaven.
“For God so love the world that He gave His only son Jesus that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16).
She’s like, “It’s that easy. I just believe and receive.” I’m like, yes mam we can’t buy it, we can’t earn it, and we won’t ever be good enough to deserve it. (Ephesians 2:8-9)”For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast.
I then led her in a prayer like this. Dear God, Please Forgive me for my many sins. Thank you Jesus for dying on that cross for me. I believe in your death, burial, and resurrection. Please come into my heart, save my soul, and be Lord of my life from this day forward.
You could hear the peace in her voice. No longer did she have to wonder where she would spend eternity when her appointed time of death came. Just hours later, with family surrounding her this once spiritually lost lady breathed her last. But, not without first finding a forever hope through Jesus Christ that can’t ever be taken away.
(1 John 5:13) says, “I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God. So that you might know that you have eternal life.”
(Romans 10:9) “If you confess Jesus as Lord you will be saved.”
Maybe someone reading this doesn’t know where they would spend eternity. Just know Jesus is the way and eternal hope is only a prayer away. I hope you find that peace and make things right before you breathe your last. Because none of us are guaranteed the next breath.
(Acts 4:12)Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to mankind by which we must be saved.”
(John 14:1-6) Jesus said, “Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. “In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. “If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. “And you know the way where I am going.” Thomas said to Him, “Lord, we do not know where You are going, how do we know the way?” Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.
God Used The Rice Festival
Posted on April 21, 2015 Leave a Comment
Refuge River Baptism
Over two years ago, my wife and I setup a booth at the Rice Festival to let our community know about the start of Refuge Church. It was to be a place where we will always meet people on their front porch with God’s love. Long before we would ever hold a Sunday morning worship gathering, God planted some seeds. One of those would be in the heart of a 16 year old girl named Emma.
At our booth that year we provided free stroller rentals and a baby changing station for those visiting the festival. Thanks to my wife’s brilliant idea we served many families in just two days. One afternoon we were loading things up to go home. One of my boys was attempting to carry way too many strollers to the car. Emma and her mom stopped to lend a hand. It was at that time we gave them information about the new church God led us to start in the community.
We never saw Emma or her Mom for months after that day until they popped in one evening to visit our church which at that time was so small that we knew each other’s middle names. Emma informed me later that she told her mom that she was going to visit Refuge Church one way or another. I remember how thrilled we were to see them join us for worship.
Nearly 1 1/2 years after our Rice Festival encounter, Emma would continue to attend Refuge Church. She invited several others along the way. On September 6, 2014 Emma (then a senior in high school) her sister, and her sister’s boyfriend would all confess their faith in Christ and follow through with Believer’s Baptism. Many cheered from the river bank at the Colleton State Park as we celebrated the salvation of several souls that day. You can check out the video on Youtube by searching Refuge Church Walterboro River Baptism (https://youtu.be/BIRvGBFYSKc) .
My heart is still moved by what God has done since we simply sought to follow Him. Two years ago, we were just setting up a booth at the Rice Festival hoping to connect with our community. Just a handful gathered for worship every other Sunday night at the Colleton Rec Center. To be honest, I even wondered at times if this ministry would ever take flight. In January 2014, we launched Sunday morning worship and watched as God began to fill each seat.
We’ve seen hundreds walk through those doors since. Today we now have two morning worship services, many volunteers and newcomers every week. I say all this to say, “How great is our God!” To the faithful you show yourself faithful. You oh God have done great things and there is still so much ahead. But, I want us to acknowledge that it is God who builds His church. He just chooses to use men and women to be His hands and feet as we all seek to reach out to the next Emma.
To find out more go to www.RefugeChurch.org. We hold services every Sunday 9:15am & 11am @ the Colleton Rec Center (Ace Basin Complex).
Colleton County Got Talent
Posted on April 17, 2015 Leave a Comment
I feel many folks may feel like Colleton County is just a struggling bunch of folks. Full of rednecks, thugs, and poor educational systems. If that’s how you feel, nothing could be further from the truth. Yes, there are many who struggle paycheck to paycheck and live life recklessly. But, those kind of folks live in every city and county throughout the world. The more I discover about this place called Colleton County, the more I can’t help but be proud to reside here.
With four boys, we’ve been able to see the functioning of almost every public school here. The constant observation has been the same. Teachers that really care about students excelling, schools that really value community and togetherness, and I can’t say enough about the excellence that so many faculty members display.
Outside of academics, you can’t help but be impressed by the Performing Art Programs. I’ve seen band performances that leave you speechless. I’ve seen choral productions that leave you in tears. And, I’ve seen local dramas at the Hampton Street Auditorium that were second to none.
This opinion does not come from someone home grown. I grew up in St. George, lived in Texas, lived in Georgia, and God brought me back to South Carolina. As a full time youth pastor for nearly 11 years, I spent large amounts of time inside some of the best schools around. None of them would I place above those I’ve discovered in Colleton County.
For those in this area that have embraced God’s call to teach our young people, thank you. Your efforts seen and unseen are making a BIG difference. You are shaping the next generation. You are helping those who might be struggling at home find something to smile about. With every display and performance it’s obivious that Colleton County is full of talent. And I believe the future is bright if we all continue to play our God called part.
*Craig Crosby is the Lead Pastor of http://www.RefugeChurch.org. He is also the local Community Liaison for Patriot Hospice. He and his wife Aimee have four boys ages 15, 13, 11, & 5. All are involved in Colleton County Public Schools.
Does Anybody Care About Me?
Posted on April 16, 2015 Leave a Comment
I tossed and turned in my bed prior to writing this article. No matter what I seemed to do I just couldn’t get comfortable or fall asleep. While struggling in a way I’m not accustomed to I could not help but think of the many whose tossing and turning have become a way of life.
Every day I come alongside those who are battling great illness, discomfort, distress, depression and what I’m sure is a daily battlefield of the mind. They can’t help but reflect on past glory days gone by and all that has changed. They wonder if they will ever walk again. Will they every see better days this side of Heaven? Even bigger, most of them wonder does anybody even care.
Many of these folks are residing in homes, hospitals, skill nursing facilities, and assisted living facilities all over the world. Have you even noticed them yourself? These folks could be your grandparent, parent, aunt, uncle, sister, brother, or next door neighbor. These folks used to live life at a different pace just like us. Now, they find themselves battling what my granddad has ingrained in my head, “High mileage on rough roads.”
What am I trying to say? I’m sure you’re wondering. I’m saying that in a world that runs quickly it’s real easy to forget those who ran before us. I truly believe that anytime we’re too busy for people, we’re too busy. After all, what greater commandment did Jesus ever give us than to “Love one another.”
So, take the time for those struggling around you. Those that can’t get up and around like they used to. Those who can’t even get to church like they did before. It’s time for the church to come to them. Be Jesus with skin.
I still recall a lady who had devoted her life to her community and church. Yet, she ask me time after time, “Does anybody care about me?” Why? Because nobody took the time to come see her and show her they cared when she needed it most. When she could no longer get out and give to others, no one was there by her bedside. “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” Show somebody you care today and every day!
Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” (Matthew 25:40)
The Preacher’s Life
Posted on April 12, 2015 Leave a Comment
It’s been considered one of the top five hardest jobs in America. Every month at least 1700 ministers leave the ministry for reasons other than retirement. 50% of ministers won’t make it more than 5 years before calling it quits. One of those reasons is the unrealistic demands many have embraced. Allow me to shed just a little light into “The Preacher’s Life.”
You see, I grew up a pastor’s kid all my life. I’ve been a pastor for over 20 years myself. Can I say that some things don’t really change?Sure, culture is always changing, but here are some challenges that remain the same for the average pastor.
1. Most Live In A Fish Bowl. Like or not, everyone keeps up with what you’ve done and especially what you’ve not done. Rightfully so. We’re held to a much higher standard than many. Yet, to fail to see a pastor’s human side is very unfair. Many are just waiting to cast a stone that says, “I knew it… you’re human.” Sure, we know that, but you would think at times others forget that. The average pastor lives under the perception that they have to be perfect, which will never be possible.
2. Most Have Few “Real” Friends. This might be one of the most overlooked things about pastors. Sure, we’re around folks day and night, involved in many people’s lives and conversations. But there are few people the pastor and especially the pastor’s wife feel they can really be themselves around. It’s hard for a pastor sometimes to transition from being a pastor to just being a person. Those who allow the pastor to just be honest, not feel condemned and are fully supportive no matter what are priceless.
3. Most Struggle To Minister To Their Family. My kids don’t call me pastor, but Daddy. My four boys want what every child desires: love, attention and devotion. If a pastor does not constantly guard his time he will lose his family while building his ministry. I tell my church often and I will remind you. A pastor’s primary ministry will always be his family. Yes, there are times that your family suffers because of your call and demand. But if I have to choose between my family and the church it won’t even be a close race. I’m going home and taking care of the family God has given me.
4. Most Don’t Know A Weekend. The average pastor will tell you that Sundays come very quick. We’re not done with one service before we’re already prayerfully planning for the next. Considering most of society is built around a normal work week, Pastor’s never feel they have a weekend. In my house, we spend all day Saturday making final preparations for Sunday.
5. Most Feel On Call 24/7 . Like a firefighter waiting with his gear beside him, so is the pastor knowing crisis can hit at anytime. There is no such thing as part-time ministry or even shift work. A pastor lives knowing his number can be called anytime, especially in today’s society where families falls apart every second. Being a pastor feels sorta like being Santa Claus. You know that many men, women, boys and girls depend on your faithfulness. And deep inside you don’t want to let anyone of them down. You often feel like you just need to get away. And, you always end your day knowing there is so much more to be done.
If you’re a pastor reading this right now I pray God’s blessing on your family and ministry. I understand firsthand the many sacrifices you make and the heavy burden it can be. Remember God has called you to be faithful, not fix the world. And, know that if God is pleased with your efforts that is all that matters.
To others reading this know that being a pastor is a calling, not a job. Your pastor needs your support and your prayers. He needs for you to want for him, the same as He wants for you and that is God’s best.
Dear Self: 3 THINGS YOU MUST DO
Posted on April 11, 2015 Leave a Comment
I wrote the following inspired words down for myself. Maybe someone else can relate and needs the reminders. May God use these words in your life as He continues to do so in mine.
DEAR SELF,
1. SLOW DOWN. Life is not a race. The one who runs the fastest does not get extra points or necessarily accomplishes more. However, it is very likely that if you continue to speed through life you’ll miss a whole lot more. Take care of yourself, spend time with your loved ones, be still and know that I’m God.
2. SETTLE DOWN. I see you down there stressing all the time. As if this world can’t go on without you. My friend, you worrying yourself into a frenzy changes nothing. But, it does lead to greater stress, higher blood pressure, and a person that is never at peace.
3. STAY THE COURSE. Remember, you don’t make up your own agenda. I put together specific plans for you when I knit you together in your mother’s womb. Listen to my voice, do what I say, and leave the results to me. I will take you further than you could ever dream or take yourself. Just let me lead the way and you stay focused on the cross.
As I’ve told you before my child, “I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit. Apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)
Never doubt I love you. I am always with you. And, I will continue to carry you through the ups and downs of this life. Slow down, settle down, and stay the course I’ve marked out for you.
Love, The God Who Knows You Inside & Out
Dear Colleton Medical Center
Posted on March 19, 2015 2 Comments
I’ve spent most of my life in ministry. I understand what it takes out of you to come alongside people in need. You give at times when you feel you have nothing left to give. You care at times when you really need someone to care about you.
I know how rewarding it is to feel you are God’s vessel, to feel God has handpicked you for a particular task that has greater impact than you may see at the time. There is no doubt that “it is more blessed to give than to receive.”
I also know what it feels like for people to jump to conclusions about you. To think they know your heart. To think things are as simple as they appear. When in reality, they have no idea just how big of shoes you are wearing.
I’ve heard a lot of folks over the past years talk negatively about Colleton Medical Center. For many reasons I feel led to share some positive light on this institution. I guess I’ve learned that hospitals and churches have one thing in common for sure: they both can be quickly judged for an isolated incident and even things beyond their control. I’m in and out of this hospital daily. I know many of the employees firsthand. I’ve seen their efforts from the first floor to the top. The more I’ve seen, the more I believe a new story needs to surface. Here is what I know for sure:
First of all, there is no doubt that many depend on this local hospital. Especially when you’re fighting for your life and you don’t have time to ride thirty extra miles down the road. You need folks ready and willing to take care of you right in your backyard. Day and night, Colleton Medical is there to provide just what you need in possibly your greatest time of need. Thank God!
Secondly, there is no doubt that Colleton Medical is full of compassionate and competent team members. I’ve seen the hearts and efforts of so many locals who work at Colleton. Many of them could work at any hospital, but they’ve chosen to keep their heart and talents in Walterboro. I’ve always said, that no one cares for their own like their own. In that hospital are some of the finest people I know. People that I would be honored to have by my hospital bedside.
Thirdly, the truth is working in the medical field is just not easy. Only God has the power to bring ultimate healing, but many expect these folks to be miracle workers. Yes, God does use them, but they too are totally dependent on a higher power. Often what man calls an accident, God calls an appointment. It’s important we don’t get those two things confused.
Now, I could share many more things and stories. But, I just want all those who work so hard at Colleton Medical Center to know you are making a difference. This community or this County would not be the same without you. I have personally grown to appreciate each of you. And, I thank God for sending you to Colleton County.
(Philippians 1:3) Every time I think of you, I give thanks to my God.
Dear Worthless
Posted on March 11, 2015 Leave a Comment
Someone reading this feels worthless, unworthy, and like you are the root of everyone’s problems. You wonder why you were even born and how you alone could have made such a mess. You just wish you could numb the pain and fix all the issues. At this point, you wonder why am I even still living. Doesn’t God know I’m just taking up space.
Lately, I’ve been running into more and more people who find themselves feeling this way. Maybe you’ve suffered a painful event. Maybe, you’ve done something you feel even God can’t forgive. Maybe you just can’t shake the feelings that everything is your fault. Here are three things God wants you to know.
#1 YOU ARE NOT AN ACCIDENT. Whether planned or not planned by man, you are not an accident. God knit you together in your mother’s womb, scheduled your day of birth, and created you for a purpose. Nothing you have ever done or will do can change that reality.
#2 YOU ARE PRICELESS. God didn’t just create you, but He sent His only son Jesus to die for you. Even knowing that we’re all sinners and fall short each day. Jesus stepped down from Heaven and went to that cross because He believes you’re worth it. God does not love us based on performance, but He always sees us as His prize creation. Never doubt God’s love and the fact He is absolutely crazy about you.
#3 YOU ARE GONNA BE ALRIGHT. When you find yourself in a dark place it can be extremely difficult to see the light. Life is full of seasons, some of which we wish would never come. But, through every valley and mountain top experience God promises to always be there. When your strength is gone, He will carry you. When you’ve created a train wreck, He will use it all for His good and glory. And, even when you feel things are so out of control, God is still in control.
Truth is, all of us have our moments. All of us make our share of mistakes. But, God’s grace is sufficient. God’s love is constant. And, God specializes in taking hopeless causes like me places otherwise impossible. So, don’t forget you are not an accident, you are priceless, and you are gonna be alright.
(Ephesians 3:18)(NLT) And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is.
*Join Pastor Craig Crosby @ Refuge Church every Sunday 10:30am @ the Colleton Rec Center. Come as you are, but expect to leave encouraged.
Why I Fight For Hospice
Posted on March 6, 2015 Leave a Comment
Recently, someone told me that I really needed to separate my real ministry from hospice care. I quickly told that person, “that’s impossible because hospice is ministry at it’s highest level.” If you want to start a fight you’ll never win, just tell me that hospice is just a business. I will fly out my seat and tell you countless stories of how hospice has changed many lives.
Please, let me just say this out of the gate. “There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under Heaven. A time to be born and a time to die.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-2) None of us choose these times, but these times have already been appointed by an Almighty God. Here is why you need hospice when it’s your time:
1. Dying is never easy.
Most don’t even like to talk about it, but the reality is we’re all going to die one day. Statistics say that most of us will not die from some sudden tragedy, but most will die of a terminal illness discoverd by doctors. When that time comes, you need all the support you can get from family, friends and those who specialize in helping folks make the most of their last days. With hospice you are provided spiritual, physical, mental, emotional and even financial support. For those of us who really feel called by God to your bedside we can help make the otherwise unbearable, the best possible. Patients and families especially need all the support they can get during these difficult days.
2. No One Should Suffer.
I’ve been by the bedside of hundreds of dying men and women. There are peaceful deaths and then there are those who suffer greatly all the way to the end. Yes, I’m passionate about the fact that no one should suffer unnecessarily. Hospice was designed to bring patients as much comfort as possible. Hospitals aren’t designed for this, nursing homes aren’t designed for this and your primary physican doesn’t have time for this. Hospice done right will ensure that any patient is kept comfortable twenty-four seven. Once you’ve seen someone suffer it’s not a sight you care to see again. Hospice works very hard to ensure that your loved one has the maximum comfort possible. This is why hospice services are available to be provided in homes, hospitals and inside any skilled nursing facility such as nursing homes or assisted living facilities.
3. You Only Die Once.
You may brush this one off, but I take dying very seriously. Those last days with your loved ones are very precious. Who wouldn’t want to make the most of what time they have left? Hospice focuses on quality because none of us can control the quantity of our days. Called hospice workers can help make those last days be some of the best days. Death is one of the most life impacting things we deal with in this life. Peace awaits those who feel their last days with their loved one went well. Years of regret await those who feel death snuck up on them and the moments they had left were not seized.
I could give you countless more reasons of why you need to be pro-hospice. I had a lady one time say, “Pastor, I just don’t like that word hospice because it means I’m going to die.” I told her, “Mam, with or without hospice you are going to die one day. We’re just here to make that process a lot easier.” And, if I had my way we would change the name to “Help Us”. Why? Because that is why hospice exists. To help patients and families get the best end of life care possible.
So, when man has done all he can and death comes knocking at your door, call hospice. We not only feel called to be by your bedside, but we can help make that bedside experience a peaceful experience for everyone involved. May God bless you and your family.
*Pastor Craig Crosby works with Patriot Hospice located in downtown Walterboro, SC. They serve patients and families throughout South Carolina. Call him @ 843-542-5572 or email him any questions you might have about hospice @ ccrosby@patriotcares.com. If he can’t help you he will certainly put you in touch with someone who can.
My Next 40 Years
Posted on March 2, 2015 Leave a Comment
Forty, its just a number. But, in my heart its a turning point. A time to reflect on the past. And even more a time for me to seize the present and future.
In just a flash, I’ve reached what is considered by many to be the halfway point of life. I was born on March 4th, 1975 in an Oklahoma City hospital. Some might say the best days are behind me. But, I say the best days are still to come. In fact, I’m claiming and believing God to do in my life what He did for a man named Job.
(Job 42:12a)The LORD blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part.
Like many my age and older, I know enough to be dangerous. But, if I waste my knowledge and experiences it will all be meaningless. As a dear friend used to say often,”it took all I’ve been through to get me where I am today.”
Over the past forty years, I’ve had some high and low moments. I’ve felt on top of the world only for life to humble me very quickly. By God’s grace I’ve tasted many successes, but I’ve also experienced the pains of defeat. Through it all, God has sustained me and carried me to this point in time.
As each day passes, I’m reminded just how short life is here on earth. One day we’re born and before we blink our days are over. For this reason, I plan to make the most of what time I might have left. Here are my top three goals moving forward:
1. I Plan To WALK WITH GOD. I’m not just talking about going to church, saying some prayers, and spitting out bible verses all day long. I’m talking about taking time each day to seek God’s face and listen to His voice. I want to know God’s love, see God’s power, and follow God’s will. With whatever time I have left I don’t want to waste another minute doing things my way, but God’s way.
2. I Plan To BE A GAME CHANGER. I don’t want to be just another person simply existing. I want God to use my life in such a radical way that everyone I encounter is encouraged and inspired to change. When I’m dead and gone, I want my funeral full of folks that were touched by God through my life. When I get to Heaven I hope to find countless folks that I had the joy of introducing to Jesus. I don’t want to just be different, but be a difference maker.
3. I WANT TO FINISH WELL. I truly believe it’s not how you started, but how you finish that matters most. I know many trials still await. I know that I will grow weary, be discouraged, and life will continue to throw curve balls my way. But, no matter what come my way, I pray I stay the course God has mapped out for me. Until, I breath my last I will aim to remain faithful to the God who created me and called me to Himself.
(James 4:13-17)(NLT)Look here, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business there and make a profit.” How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.” Otherwise you are boasting about your own plans, and all such boasting is evil. Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.
*Join Pastor Craig any Sunday 10:30am @ RefugeChurch. Come as you are, but don’t expect to the leave the same!
Pastor Craig Crosby 